[desirae]

I have a 17 year old pregnant sister. She is due with her baby boy next month. I am very concerned with her situation.

Right now Dana lives with "mommie dearest", a few miles down the road from my house. I often check on her, and I witness her situation worsening. I'm not sure what to do, and I was hopeing somebody could give me some advice.

Our mom is a crack cocaine addict. Slowly over time she has been losing everything my grandma left after she passed away. She lost my grandma's car, furniture, and personal antiques.

Today I went to check on Dana and my mom was speeding down the road ahead of me. She pulled over to talk to me, and she was as high as a kite. She told me the police were looking for her, since she didn't pay her bondsmen.

I know my mom, as soon as she gets the extra funds. Which she'll obtain probably by prostituting herself, she will abonden Dana, and not even say goodbye.

Dana has nobody but me now. I expected this would eventually happen, since my mom has lost everything over and over again. I don't have nothing to offer her accept a small closet size bedroom, and a refrigerator full of food.

What should I do? What can be done? Should I kick my mom's lousy, worthless ***?

Thanks
Desirae

[bebop]

get your sister out of there. move her into that bedroom. I wouldn't wait another minute!!

[MacD]

What should you do?.....That's a toughy!....but my best advice would be to keep loving and supporting those who need it...but stay out of the trap of being anyone's "only one"....Your sister is not a child....she's expecting one....Don't carry the weight of every family member on your shoulders....lots of love....grace

[bipolar_bear]

Maybe you could consider letting your sister make the decision but letting her know she is welcome in your house. I am sorry you and she find yourselves in this position.

[kimmydawn]

(((((((((desirae))))))))))))

You say to don't have nothing to give her but a small closet size bedroom and a refrigerator full of food. WOW, from the sounds of your post you have so much more than that to offer your sister.

You have insight, intelligence, love, understanding and a whole lot more.

With you in her life, your sister's gonna be alright...so will you.

Peace through this journey...

KD

[SerenitysWave]

<font color="purple">If it were me, I would have her move in to that small bedroom in my place, it is a start. The situation sounds dangerous for her and her baby, and getting her out of there is priority. I would also go with her to the welfare office and check into some programs to help get her on her feet. Some may help with child care while she works and/or continues school. Is the dad going to be in the baby's life? Maybe there is some support on his side. I wish you and your sister the very best.... ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
Melinda </font>

[January]

Hi,

A tiny bedroom and a full fridge sounds like heaven to me. I would take my sister in but make sure she goes and gets the medical and social help she needs. She needs to stand on her own with someone standing at the ready to help when needed.

You sound like a wonderful, giving and loving person. I am so sorry for what your mother has put you through. Neither you nor your sister deserves her out of control actions. Please remember to take good care of yourself, too. You can't help others if you don't take care of yourself.

If I can ever help you, just send me a pm.

I wish you the best of everything.

Hugs,

Jan

[Rhapsody]

As a young mother once at the young tender age of 17, and without any one to lean on, might I say.... your sister needs a FRIEND right now, one that really cares about her and the unborn baby she carries.... and what better person to be that FRIEND than her trusted SISTER.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

[(JD)]

A small place where someone cares is worth more than a mansion where there isn't love or safety, imo. Take her in if you can, and discuss how she can obtain assistance in putting her own life together?

[desirae]

Hello everybody,

Thank you so much for your posts, and opinions.

I'm still very weary of her/our situation. I'm not sure exactly what to do. I have an idea, my conscience tells me to do, and my husband and everybody else tells me to mind my own business.

Right now my sister is at my house, and is on my absolute last nerve. She is very disrespectful, selfish, and hateful. I have bitten my tongue for the last two days, but today I've had enough.

I want to help Dana but I can't tolerate her serious anger and resentment issues. She cusses and rants around my kids. She treats them like their always on her last nerve.

I'm considering calling CPS, and requesting she be put in a home, I had researched on the internet for pregnant teens. I truly believe this would be best for her. I'm unable to provide what her and her baby will need.

I feel very guilty for this. It kills me that I'm unable to help her. But I feel she's made it this way, I've done what I could.

She's not quite sure of who the father is......but all the possibilities are young losers. None have them have even called her or checked on her since she discovered she was pregnant.

What should I do seriously? I'm so overwhelmed with this, my babies, and my college. Should I let the wind blow were it's intended, and control what I can in my own personal life? Please help me.

Desirae