[pgrundy]

I feel like disclosure is fairly risky in this economy. My therapist feels like it could help in setting limits at work, since so far they pretty much ignore my requests to keep my hours part-time and call constantly and over-schedule me so that it's very difficult to do what I need to do to stay well.

Anyone have any experience with disclosing your illness to your employer? I feel like even though there are technically legal protections, disclosing your illness is still an invitation to terminate--like, they'll find a reason if they know.

[gma45]

I would be worried about disclosing my illness to my employer. I would let them know I was hired for part-time and that is all I can work because of other obligations I had before I started here. I may be able to work a few more hours to help you out once in a while, but I am unable to work full-time. Or can you work with me? I have appt's on such and such days and if they ask for what tell them it is personal or medical reasons. I don't know if this is much help to you and your situation, it is what I would try though!

[pgrundy]

Thanks gma45. That's kind of how I feel I should respond, and I've been doing that, but they don't seem to respect my boundaries. My supervisor keeps telling me next week will be better but it never is.

There ARE people who get what they want but they aren't all that reliable. I feel like maybe my reliability is not an asset in this setting and when I say I can't come in, I have to not come in. Hopefully they won't fire me. They seem to have a LOT of trouble keeping people.

[alwaysrejoice]

I disclosed my illness to my bosses and was hospitalized then got promoted! That was years ago though.

[pgrundy]

Wow!

That's a good outcome!

[Fresia]

I have learned over the years as an employee, employers are always short-handed and will always need you to come in. As a manager I know, employees are always calling off and need people to fill in. It is up to the employee to honestly say when they can work, fill in when they can if they can, and stick to it. If it changes, be up front to come in more or less; if not, stick to what they can realistically do, because burnout and unhappy employees does not help anyone. It is the managers job to fill shifts or vacancies, that is why they are paid more even though some unfortunately try to push it off onto the employee. As an employee there is a responsibility to uphold what you are hired for, stick to that, change where you can, and then just be upfront if circumstances change with as much notice as possible.

I have found sticking to 'I cannot work at a certain time due to "medical reasons" ' with plenty of notice is the safer thing to do and much appreciated rather than to disclose the actual illness. I know for some, disclosure has worked out but I don't want to give any reason other than job performance to bias my position, and it has been used against me when it has been disclosed. It helps to keep things more professional as well with less chance of discrimination.

[PurpleFlyingMonkeys]

pgrundy, I'm sorry your work is doing this to you. It's such a hard thing to come out and tell people like your employers that you have a mental illness. It almost makes you feel like you're back in high school about to tell the teacher you have a mental disorder. Although it's illegal to terminate or discriminate against someone for their mental illness, it doesn't stop it from happening unfortunately. I have not informed my work of anything other than my seizure and the only reason I told them was that I needed someone to know what to look for if it happened again. Sure enough I only told one person about the seizure. I even called back and asked her not to tell anyone but the GM because I didn't want people treating me differently because of it. Well not even 3 months later and everyone asks me every day "any more episodes"? and I mean everyone! They all knew about my doctors appointment yesterday... They spread things like a wildfire around here. So unfortunately the work place is not a very confidential place. There's always that person that still belongs in high school that looks forward to hearing negative things about coworkers and they can't keep their mouth shut to save their life. Sometimes it is nessesary to tell the employers but I would be sure to tell ONLY who you think you can trust.

[pgrundy]

Thanks Purpleflyingmonkeys. I know just what you mean and that's what I'm trying to avoid. So far, so good, but the last two months they have been so shorthanded I seem to be scheduled every day and way over what I want.

Thanks for sharing your experience with disclosure. It validates some of my own reservations!

[pgrundy]

Fresia, thanks.

I agree with you, but what has been happening to me the past two months is I keep setting limits (the same ones) and I keep getting scheduled anyway, way more than I want. Half the time I get there and get pressured to stay even longer. I tell my supervisor I can't do it, and he begs me to just do it one more week because he's so shorthanded, and then the next week comes and he does the same thing all over again.

So I feel like I AM setting my limits and saying no, over and over, but he just ignores me, or lies. He's even admitted, "OK I lied. I just needed to find a way to get you to do it and lying was all I had."

What do you do with that?

It took me a year and a half to get this job after losing a good job in 2008 (due to the crash), but I feel like I have no life and no decent paychecks either.

I do think I'll pass on my therapists solution of a doctor's note though I don't want to disclose. I think the down side is too big.

I will bring it up to HR though--like, how can I limit my availability? Other people manage it. And it's not like I'm not being clear. I am.

[pgrundy]

BTW I'd try to see the 'up' side of it more if I thought I had a future, but it's minimum wage, no raises ever, and I get a monthly review saying my 'stats' suck and I better improve, but then in the next breath they act like I'm indispensable. So like, which is it? I suck? Or I'm indispensable? Pick one. If it's #2, toss me a quarter or something. I've been there over a year and seen over a dozen people come and go.

So there's no full time work there, no benefits, no future no raises ever...and living in MI, I feel like I can't quit. But I'd like to at least get my boundaries respected, at least most of the time.

[SoupDragon]

I am Uk based and not sure whether you have the same legal protection in the USA. Here we have law which means that an employer cannot discriminate against someone with a long term health problem - although as you say sometimes employers may look for loop holes, although in my experience this is more likely to happen in smaller businesses, the larger ones have more to lose if they are caught out.

Saying that the employer does not need to know someone's actual diagnosis to be obliged to make adjustments for them, they just need to know that the person has a long term health problem, how it may impact on work and what control measures they may have to put in place.

Obvioulsy if an employer does not know that someone has a health problem then they would not be expected to make any allowances for them. So I would not say that you should never tell your employer about your health especially if the extra demands they may be putting on you may make your symptoms worse. Nor am I saying you should always tell your employer - you may be best placed to know how they may react. I would just think carefully about the pros and cons, bearing in mind that if your health problem is made worse by work then it may even lead to you needing sick leave, when in fact this could be avoided if your employer knew you had health issues and was prepared to acknowledge them and support you.

It is a hard decision I know.....I have not told my employer, although I know the benefits.

[pgrundy]

Soup Dragon, that is well said. Yes, it's complicated and not something to decide without a lot of forethought, which is why I posted this. Thanks so much for your input.

My employer knows I have a general health problem but does not know the nature of it. I've asked to keep my hours to two or three days per week, about 15 hours, no more. At the beginning of the year that was respected, but as the year wore on it wasn't, my immediate supervisor deciding I looked well enough and had recovered (even though he didn't know why I was hospitalized in January).

My impression is that the U.S. has laws prohibiting discrimination, but most corporations can get around them by having you sign an 'at will' employment contract, meaning they can fire you at any time for no reason, because the employment is in no way guaranteed. Most jobs do require you to sign this if hired.

Retail here is especially bad right now. Most large retail establishments pay the legal minimum and try to work you up to 39 hours as a part-time employee--no benefits at all.

So I'm thinking it through, playing it by ear.

I really appreciate all the good input, and you summarized the problem perfectly. I think a lot of people in the U.S. end up ill unnecessarily because our workplaces are so abusive and demanding right now. It's like, suck it up or buzz off. I guess that's why we have protestors in the streets now. (One of the many reasons...)

[LightBlueButterfly]

It's a decision that is hard to make. My supervisor knows that I am bipolar and that I have diabetes. I've been hospitalized several times over the last 3 years for my diabetes and I always worry about my job. However my supervisor is really understanding and only wants me to get better so I can get back to work (LOL). Earlier this year when I was hospitalized for my bipolar he was understanding when my doctor told him I couldn't go back to work for a week after I was out of the hospital. My supervisor's wife has several mental illness so he understands what I am going through. I am thankful for that, because if it wouldn't be for that I'm not sure I would have shared with him about me being bipolar. I'm a manager for the company that I work for, most of my co workers do not know about me being bipolar. They know about my diabetes but not my bipolar. Sounds crazy, but I think they are more accepting of the diabetes than the bipolar illness.

[gma45]

Why no raises ?

[ECHOES]

I'm surprised your therapist is suggesting disclosure as a way of dealing with the demands of your employer.

No, I would not disclose. I don't see any reason an employer needs to know about my psychological issues. I can't imagine my manger telling me about her own psychological issues or emotional struggles.

It would be much better to have a discussion with your employer to make sure you are both on the same page about what is expected of you. They may think that they are giving you a great opportunity for more hours, if they think that's what you want. I'm sure that some part-time workers would welcome that, but that's not what you want. What the company wants and needs is important too, so talking together would really help clarify both what you want and need (all you need tell them is you have other commitments. That your other commitments are not working too many hours is not something you have to specify ), and what the company wants and needs.

[pgrundy]

Originally Posted by gma45

Why no raises ?

They just won't give any, period. I think corporate kind of wants constant turnover to keep costs low. No full time either.

[Fresia]

Even your provider can write that you "are being medically treated" but not what for and scheduling accommodations are needed as to not interfere with treatment; it does not have to be disclosed and you can ask them not to disclose but yet if you do want this back-up to enforce why you cannot work more hours so that you are covered with the employer.

There are some employers who will take advantage of you no matter what and sounds like this is one. I understand the delicate line walking though because you want to keep the job and be accommodating, but yet at what cost; I would too. I can see where the documentation might help you to set boundaries but I still can't see where disclosure will help, especially knowing this is a boss who lies is a tribute to his character; questions for me, that should you disclose, how he/she will use your medical information in the future and cannot be trusted with it. I would not disclose to someone like this.

If they are so short-handed, are they short staffed? Have they considered hiring someone part-time or as a floater to pick-up shifts? No need to answer, just something wanted to throw out there that might want to mention if it had not been considered and to possibly discuss the next time you talk to him/her about scheduling, also if comfortable doing. This might help take the pressure off.

I can understand your dilemma and hear your frustration. We have to do what is best for us and it sounds like you are taking the steps to do just that. Do what you need to to take care of you for your protection and to be well. Take good care meanwhile.

[mala]

Well I came out as mentally ill and it wasnt a good idea, I know that everyone views me as the odd ball, and I dont really care anymore. It really was hell working here, I felt in a terrible trance, still feel under spiritual influences but I dont make a fuss as I know its a symptom of mental illness, esp schozoprenia, nothing I can do about it, except manage each day. Check out your out mental health organisations that can advise.
Love
mala

[SoupDragon]

Supporting those with mental health in the workplace is on the government agenda at the moment - TV and radio adverts challenging the stigma that exists and government organisations funded to support employees in the workplace who may have a long term health problem. Employees do not have to disclose a diagnosis to their employer to get legal support, but just have to evidence that they have a long term health problem and what special support they may need.

I agree that sharing a diagnosis should not be necessary - once that information is out there, you cannot guarantee how it will be used or where it will end up. And also people may jump to the wrong conclusions.