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#1
Dec 21, 2011, 01:54 PM
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Ready to throw in the towel yet again. Tired of fighting, tired of convincing, tired or pulling up all the bad memories, tired of being "different" ugh so tired. Don't want to "die" or anything... Just tired of thinking... Shut down? Auto pilot? Just maybe...
Meltdown I guess is what some would call this... I'm lacking the energy to go on this way though. I'm tired of it... It just hit me, what's the point? It's obvious that those who suffer from as many "mental illnesses" as I don't make use of their lives the way society believes they should... So why try? Tired... Ugh... Seems when these sentenses are uttered from my mouth blackouts begin... That's ok... I wont fight it... No point... No point in fighting the hallucinations... No point in fighting anything it just causes more confusion for me... Auto pilot had to be one of mans best qualities in scenarios such as this one...
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I'd lock my hands behind my head, I'd cover my heart and hit the deck, I'd brace myself for the impact if I were you. 
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 beauflow, finonaey, kindachaotic
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#2
Dec 21, 2011, 02:14 PM
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When I get stuck, I start reading, immerse myself in novels
 It's a great retreat but helps because the people in the books are all feeling and doing, etc. and one can vicariously do it with them but it's better than the computer or TV because you have to use your own imagination to "see" it, to get into it and that helps one's positive mental abilities and gives one's unconscious a little workout too.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
 beauflow, PurpleFlyingMonkeys
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#3
Dec 21, 2011, 05:14 PM
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 some times I do something similar to Perna-- I like to do art just for myself if I can gather up the motivation and time--- it some times makes me feel refreshed and I find it to be just-- see not all is so bad.I hope you well and you find what you need to keep going many hugs to you
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 "A laugh is worth a hundred groans in any market." Charles Lamb
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