[cdillon]

<font color="#880000"> </font> HI! everyone. My husband is currently in our state mental hospital being treated for paranoid schizophrenia. He's 58 years old and has never been on medication nor had treatment for his illness until now. His family feels the illness has been progressive for at least the last twenty years. There are several criminal charges pending related to a severe psychotic episode last May.The man has NO memory of the incident (thankfully) or much of what happened during the preceding month when he was spiraling downward into the episode. Unfortunately, he spent eight months in jail unmedicated before finally being transferred to the hospital.

Now that Dale is medicated, it's so wonderful to have my sweet, gentle husband back, still somewhat delusional but so very different. My concern is this, and maybe one of the doctors can answer the question. Part of his "treatment" during the ninety day evaluation phase, is trying to force him to remember what happened while he was in the episode so that he can "aid and assist" in court. While I certainly understand the position of law enforcement, it's very upsetting for him to be "pushed" to try to remember something that he doesn't know or believe even happened. How far will they go to force the issue? Knowing my husband as I do, IF he ever does come to a knowledge of his actions, the remorse will be overwhelming and devastate him. His daughter and I were the victims.

At what point should the doctors begin to involve the family with his treatment? Unfortunately, Dale's still in the denial stage and we expect he will be until some of the pieces start fitting together for him. He lives for our visits and phone calls. We cannot discuss the criminal case with him at all and very gently try to let him know the changes we are seeing in him that are positive. Personally, I don't believe that he'll ever remember the "incident" and will get a civil committment through the courts. I'm just not sure what the whole process entails. Perhaps someone who's been through a similar circumstance could offer some help and advice.

Thank you! Carol

welcome to the forums. i'm afraid that i cannot help you but wanted you to know that i'll keep you and your family in my thoughts. xoxoxo pat

[cdillon]

Thank you! This life experience has been a lesson in forgiveness, humility and finding our inner strength. Everyone that is suffering from mental illness or is a caregiver needs all the love and support they can get.
Carol

[bipolar_bear]

Carol I wish I could be of more help but I have nor do I know anyone who has been in such a position. I am glad your husband is getting the help he needs and sorry that you and your daughter were the targets as a result of his illness. I hope the best for you and your family.

I would also like to welcome you to the forums and hope you find some support that you are looking for.

since criminal charges are involved basically what is going to happen is:

1. they can try him based on the evidence that they have from witnesses and so on and he will be found innocent or guilty solely based on that. If the witnesses and evidence point to his guilt and he does not remember it may turn out he was innocent but without his testimony and eveidence locked up in his brain he may end up in prison, which is why his lawyer and everyone is pressing him to remember. If he really is innocent of the charges he deserves to be free not locked in prison due to lack of evidence that points to his innocence.

without his remembering he could also be deemed incompetent to stand trial. if That happened he will not be release. He will be sent to a prison or security type mental facility until he is deened competent to stand trial, meaning either he remembered the situation or the doctors feel he can go through with trial without memory and take his chances of being convicted or not based on what the prosecution and defense already has.

It would be in his best interest to "remember" and as soon as possible. Mental facilities are not places you want him to spend possibly the rest of his lifetime because no one can say for sure that he won't commit the same crime again expecially when he can't remember what happened to set him off the first time if he committed the crime and they will assume he did without his remembering the situation.

[January]

Hi Carol,

Welcome to PC. You'll find many caring and supportive members here.

I can't help you, but Doc John has a chat for all of us at 9:00 pm est on Tuesdays. Perhaps he will be able to help you. It may be crowded when you get to the chat, but speak right up. Start with, "Doc" at the beginning of your sentence so he can see it. The conversations sometimes fly in there and it's hard for him to catch everthing.

I wish you and your family every sucess.

(((((((((((((((( C & family )))))))))))))

Best,

January

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

Hi Carole welcome I too am another one who has no first hand experience with this but I wanted to say hi...send you some well needed hugs and say I think its nice that you are standing by him....in todays world thats not often the case

[DaveyJones]

Hi, Carole...

I'm no lawyer, but this I do know...if your husband has charges pending, then he should not speak to law enforcement or their representatives without an attorney present. Trust me, I learned this the hard way. They'll fuss and carry on and threaten...don't let him do it!!!

DJ

[jmo531]

Hi Carol and welcome.

I am so very sorry for what you and your family are going through right now. I just wanted to add that I beleive that they can not make a spouse testify against eachother. So if you are called as a witness, you can refuse without punishment. I beleive that is the case. Someone please correct me if I am wrong.

Carol,

I would suggest some couselling for you and your daughter as you guys are really dealing with some heavy things right now. You need some sort of support to help you through this. We are also here for you.