[sandworm]

I was so calm, like a mountain lake, writing my mom and
letting her know the why of "i will not be up, just yet' and
need to sort things out. Then I
reached the end of the letter, the only THOUGHT on my mind was
calmness, and ending the letter. (email). when
I was about to sign my name,
I typed without even thinking
B****H
to refer to mom.
then i suppose my other mind was hoping to
sign off with "S"

It really woke me up as to how much she has
wrecked me. "help"!!!.

I could use a mentor to calm my thoughts when I need to
know what to do. I did join adopt a mom,"dad",
but it is so hard now a days to instill GOOD habits to
learn how to live life well.

(I am imagining a Uncle Sam poster "I WANT YOU" that says"

"I want your hugs". ha ha.

I hope you are all doing well; I also hope you have wonderful
parents who support you emotionally. Struggling with
mental issues without that support sucks.

"S"

[kindachaotic]

(((((sandworm))))) Saying I'm sorry about your life just doesn"t cut it.

Just wanted you to know someone saw your post & cares.

Take care.

[lizardlady]

Hugs for you hon....

[gma45]

Sending hugs to you. Sometimes just writing out how you feel helps even if you don't send it. I am always here to listen.

[Perna]

A spade is a spade! If it feels like your mother has acted like a b toward you, there is nothing wrong with you about that, you aren't wrecked!

[lizardlady]

Sandworm, a variation on gma's idea is to write an e-mail that expresses what you want to say, but send to to a "safe" person, not the person it's addressed to. Re-reading what I typed I'm not sure it makes sense....

I once had a friend who would encourage me to type out the hurt and pain in an e-mail, then send it to him. That allowed me to get the pain outside me and send it off. It worked. Maybe you could ask someone to do the same for you?

[sandworm]

Originally Posted by lizardlady

Sandworm, a variation on gma's idea is to write an e-mail that expresses what you want to say, but send to to a "safe" person, not the person it's addressed to. Re-reading what I typed I'm not sure it makes sense....

I once had a friend who would encourage me to type out the hurt and pain in an e-mail, then send it to him. That allowed me to get the pain outside me and send it off. It worked. Maybe you could ask someone to do the same for you?

HA HA, Lizardlady, I shared that with a 'safe' friend, he claimed he
now needed therapy.

HA HA. hey, that did happen, but seriously. I like here on PC, because I
learn, what I went through was "NOTHING' and more can be survived and
even thrived in. pppbbbbtt.

I guess what really hurts is it is like that movie '50 first dates'
mom will do something just 'yuck' then poof, no memory of it
in THE LEAST only minutes later.
>> NOPE, didn't happen, you are crazy. you coocoo, you need some PROFESSIONAL HELP"
I would say there is a perfect case of ...projection.
OY VAY ha ha.


"S"

[sandworm]

Thank you all for your kind and loving support, hugs all around