[atomicc]

Hi guys, I'm not sure this fits here..but I'm not sure if any of these things coincide with the disorders I have been diagnosed with (BPD, GAD, OCD).

I have recently noticed that I talk EXTREMELY fast around and hardly ever shut up. I am constantly going and I switch topics almost immediately after starting one. I have a lot trouble when other people talk because things feel like they're always bursting out of me. My boyfriend also says I start sentences where they have no beginning and he has no idea what I'm talking about. I forget sometimes that other people aren't aware of constant chatter in my head and I just start talking out loud.
I know that moods are varying with us with BPD, from anxiety to depression to anger and so on.
I get in these kind of "delirious" moods where everything seems so surreal and I laugh at everything. Things come out of my mouth that are very odd and I don't even know where they came from. I repeat myself over and over (that may have to do with my OCD?) It drives my boyfriend nuts. It's like a get stuck in a loop. I often don't realize I'm being extremely loud or saying inappropriate things loudly when they come out of my mouth.
Does anyone have any insight into this? Are these perhaps just my quirks?

[wushuduck]

How long are your periods of disorganised speech?

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by Twigg

How long are your periods of disorganised speech?

Um well when stuff comes out of my mouth and I talk loudly about inappropriate things it usually lasts a few minutes to a few hours. I'll get in this really weird place where everything is so funny to me and nothing I say makes sense. As for the fast talking, I'm almost always like that. I always have to be talking and feel like words are always pouring out of me one topic to the next without even realizing I'm doing this.

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by atomicc

Um well when stuff comes out of my mouth and I talk loudly about inappropriate things it usually lasts a few minutes to a few hours. I'll get in this really weird place where everything is so funny to me and nothing I say makes sense. As for the fast talking, I'm almost always like that. I always have to be talking and feel like words are always pouring out of me one topic to the next without even realizing I'm doing this.

Hmm... I mean, I'd say it sounds like bipolar personally, but if it only lasts a few hours at most then it probably isn't. Have you spoken to your psychiatrist about it?

[atomicc]

No, I just have a T and a PsychNurse the prescribes my meds in the counseling center at my college. I'm graduating this year though so I'll have to go out and find a doctor on my own. :/. I'll bring it up to someone someday. It may just be how I am?

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by atomicc

No, I just have a T and a PsychNurse the prescribes my meds in the counseling center at my college. I'm graduating this year though so I'll have to go out and find a doctor on my own. :/. I'll bring it up to someone someday. It may just be how I am?

Yeah, maybe. As long as it isn't a major disruption in your life!

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by Twigg

Yeah, maybe. As long as it isn't a major disruption in your life!

No, people just find me very odd and I think they avoid me for these reasons. I have few friends and my boyfriends family thinks I'm a weirdo. I'm proud to be weird though.

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by atomicc

No, people just find me very odd and I think they avoid me for these reasons. I have few friends and my boyfriends family thinks I'm a weirdo. I'm proud to be weird though.

Good on you!

Sounds like a typical BPD "manic" moment. Your T should be able to help you with coping skills to detect your warning signs of when this mood is about to hit and help you get through it with minor disruptions to your life. Dont be too concerned, this is normal for your diagnosis

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by Supanova

Sounds like a typical BPD "manic" moment. Your T should be able to help you with coping skills to detect your warning signs of when this mood is about to hit and help you get through it with minor disruptions to your life. Dont be too concerned, this is normal for your diagnosis

Can you get short manic episodes with BDP? I often get intense sudden mood changes, like on Saturday I was extremely hyper and elated and euphoric for the first time ever for about four hours and then I crashed and suddenly hit rock bottom.

Thats pretty usual for someone with BPD.

[eskielover]

It might be something you look into before you graduate & want to establish your career.....don't want anything getting in the way of a successful career if it's something that can be taken care of possibly with meds & worked on through T.....there's one thing to be "proud to be weird" vs ending up damaging the possibility of a future career if it ends up getting in the way.

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by Supanova

Thats pretty usual for someone with BPD.

Really? I've looked at countless websites, the DSM and research papers and found nothing.

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by eskielover

It might be something you look into before you graduate & want to establish your career.....don't want anything getting in the way of a successful career if it's something that can be taken care of possibly with meds & worked on through T.....there's one thing to be "proud to be weird" vs ending up damaging the possibility of a future career if it ends up getting in the way.

Thank you, but I can actually completely contain myself in those sorts of situations...at least I have so far. I'm extremely competent at my job and at the top of every one of my classes. It's only noticed by people who see me often and in a more personal way.

Ask in the BPD forum, Im sure there will be people who can relate. I know it was common for my BPD mates. They'd go from feeling like you've described to crashing lows in no time. It is able to be controlled with the right therapy.

Affective (Emotional) Instability. Early clinical observers noted the intensity, volatility and range of the borderline patient’s emotions. It was originally proposed that borderline emotional instability involved the same problems of affective irregularity found in persons with mood disorders, particularly depression and bipolar disorder. It is now known that although individuals with BPD display marked affective instability (i.e., intense episodic depression, unrest, anger, panic, or despair), these mood changes usually last only a few hours, and that the underlying dysphoric mood is rarely relieved by periods of well-being or satisfaction. These episodes may reflect the individual’s extreme reactivity to stresses, particularly interpersonal ones and a neurobiologically-based inability to regulate emotions.

A BPD Brief | Borderline Personality Disorder

In addition to intense emotions, people with BPD experience emotional lability, or changeability. Although the term suggests rapid changes between depression and elation

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by Supanova

Ask in the BPD forum, Im sure there will be people who can relate. I know it was common for my BPD mates. They'd go from feeling like you've described to crashing lows in no time. It is able to be controlled with the right therapy.


A BPD Brief | Borderline Personality Disorder

I appreciate the info, but I already knew all that. What I am asking about is my tendency to speak quite rapidly, jumping from topic to topic assuming every one knows what I'm talking about. I am also asking why I often say odd and sometimes inappropriate things without the conscious thought to do so. They just come out of my mouth without me thinking them at all. I don't see any of that there...unless I'm misreading? Thanks again though.

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by atomicc

I appreciate the info, but I already knew all that. What I am asking about is my tendency to speak quite rapidly, jumping from topic to topic assuming every one knows what I'm talking about. I am also asking why I often say odd and sometimes inappropriate things without the conscious thought to do so. They just come out of my mouth without me thinking them at all. I don't see any of that there...unless I'm misreading? Thanks again though.

I can relate to the bold part. I've always spoke relatively quickly and it's sometimes difficult for people to understand me, but the topic-jumping seems to frustrate people the most. Like, I'll interrupt someone half way through a sentence without realising it because a thought would pop into my head and I have to get it out. Or I'll spring about 20 questions at someone enthusiastically without noticing it and they'll call me out on it and be like "woah, one question at a time." I don't know if I'm explaining it well enough, there's more to it than that, but is that what you mean?

[atomicc]

Originally Posted by Twigg

I can relate to the bold part. I've always spoke relatively quickly and it's sometimes difficult for people to understand me, but the topic-jumping seems to frustrate people the most. Like, I'll interrupt someone half way through a sentence without realising it because a thought would pop into my head and I have to get it out. Or I'll spring about 20 questions at someone enthusiastically without noticing it and they'll call me out on it and be like "woah, one question at a time." I don't know if I'm explaining it well enough, there's more to it than that, but is that what you mean?

Yes! I am like that as well. I feel like I just have to get all these thoughts out and sometimes they don't even really matter or they're odd things. The other part is when I say things I honestly don't know I'm saying. For example I was waiting on line with my boyfriend for comic con, thousands of people around, and out no where I just said very loudly "I'm going to pee my pants!" Granted I did have to pee..but I don't remember thinking that. It just happened out of my mouth..

[wushuduck]

Originally Posted by atomicc

Yes! I am like that as well. I feel like I just have to get all these thoughts out and sometimes they don't even really matter or they're odd things. The other part is when I say things I honestly don't know I'm saying. For example I was waiting on line with my boyfriend for comic con, thousands of people around, and out no where I just said very loudly "I'm going to pee my pants!" Granted I did have to pee..but I don't remember thinking that. It just happened out of my mouth..

Yeah that's it. It's like I need to get the thoughts out before I forget them, but then before the person can respond I'll have another thought and have to get that one out. And they're like... "slow down!"

I literally laughed out loud at that haha, I don't really know what that could be... a quick Google reckons it could have something to do with ADHD?

Bipolar and Borderline Personality Disorder

Mood shifts between mania and depression are common to both but behavior during those episodes differ according to the condition.

Borderline Personality Disorder

Although some symptoms resemble those of bipolar disorder and depression, borderline personality disorder is characterised by intense bouts of anger, anxiety or depression only lasting hours or days. Mood swings vary from periods of dysphoria to periods of euphoria, from manic self-confidence to severe anxiety and irritability. Thus people with borderline personality disorder suffer from a disorder of emotion regulation.

Just after a quick google search.

[IndieVisible]

Originally Posted by atomicc

Really? I've looked at countless websites, the DSM and research papers and found nothing.

That's because it's not at all typical. BPD mood swings consists of depressed, anxiety, irritability (rage), much narrower mood swing and does not include any thing you described which sounds hypomania to me. But it could also be some thing else too. Sure doesn't sound like BPD to me though.

[katheryn]

Hi after reading through your post and replies i. Thought i would comment, i have suffered with depression on and of for years also mild form of adhd two of my children have add/adhd ,
When i talk fast ppl tell me to slow down i also have to say stuff as it comes to me as it may disappear over wise if i don't get what i want out, bk in 05 i was sitting round my kitchen table having coffee with a so called friend and hubby
When i noticed my self talking strange like a steam train on the loose, this was my beginning of deep depression,
I. Also write like this if i am anxious or stressed and write a post it can become un readable, hope this helps

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[thickntired]

Hi

My coworkers and professors used to get so aggravated with me for not following a train of thought when I spoke. I often interrupted or picked up where I left off 20 minutes ago. For me it helped when I was diagnosed and medicated for adhd.

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