[serenity2298]

Hi all, this might turn into a bit of a long passage but I hope someone finds it interesting...lol..and can give me some insight... I've been on effexor and risperdal for abt 9 weeks now I suffer with depression with psychotic symptoms. My psychosises usually consists of becoming spaced out and dissociating, I have like characters I turn into but its not DID because I remember (though sometimes blurry) what I do. I had been doing fine for about 4 weeks, fell into depression again but came out of it. Well last weekend I did something very strange; I got into a total strangers mans car for a lift and even met him for lunch two days later. I had no interest in him whatso ever but I believe I relapsed and turned into one of my characters who is very messed up. I even dressed differently. He's called me persistently and wants to see me again but now that I'm back to normal I got frightened and made up a lie that my ex and I got back together and I want nothing to do with him. He accepted. How not-so-normal is this? I mean I put myself at risk and I do believe I know what the trigger was even as my mum has a history of prostitution and still is one and i had heard something very bad about her recently before this happened. Why did I do this risky thing and get into an iranian's car (nothing against iranians) and put myself at risk like that. ANYTHING could have happened! Was it another psychosis? It's not like me at all to do this I'm very shy although I used to do it A LOT in the past when I was more ill and on no meds. Should I tell my T about it, is there a risk I'll be institutionalised as I'm putting myself at risk? Plus my son even because this guy now he almost knows where I live now. Or do i possibly need my antipsychotics increased? I'm on 2 mg at the moment. Thanks for any comments or insight!

[manwithnofriends]

does your T know you take the meds? And their side effects?

[serenity2298]

Originally Posted by manwithnofriends

does your T know you take the meds? And their side effects?

Yea she knows I take the meds they are prescribed

[avlady]

omg you do need to get some type of help as you are endangering yourself.

[serenity2298]

Originally Posted by avlady

omg you do need to get some type of help as you are endangering yourself.

Thank you for your reply avlady. I am kind of getting help I don't have medical insurance and I'm in europe so i have to pay to go see a T privately but only when I can afford to. 4 years ago i saw my T for about 4 months this time round I've seen her only once. At the hospital I'm on a waiting list to see a cheaper psychotherapist which could take months. The only help I have at the moment is my medications which have admittedly helped me at least with my depression...

[JadeAmethyst]

I agree with avlady, yes some additional help IS needed this is endangering for your life.

[JadeAmethyst]

Do you have a friend, clergy or safe person to call?

[serenity2298]

Originally Posted by JadeAmethyst

Do you have a friend, clergy or safe person to call?

I have one friend but once I'm in a psychosis I don't think of asking for help it's already too late But after I got back to normal reality I told her and she got really worried about me. I don't like these psychosises they are scary! Maybe I need more professional help?

[vans1974]

Originally Posted by serenity2298

Hi all, this might turn into a bit of a long passage but I hope someone finds it interesting...lol..and can give me some insight... I've been on effexor and risperdal for abt 9 weeks now I suffer with depression with psychotic symptoms. My psychosises usually consists of becoming spaced out and dissociating, I have like characters I turn into but its not DID because I remember (though sometimes blurry) what I do. I had been doing fine for about 4 weeks, fell into depression again but came out of it. Well last weekend I did something very strange; I got into a total strangers mans car for a lift and even met him for lunch two days later. I had no interest in him whatso ever but I believe I relapsed and turned into one of my characters who is very messed up. I even dressed differently. He's called me persistently and wants to see me again but now that I'm back to normal I got frightened and made up a lie that my ex and I got back together and I want nothing to do with him. He accepted. How not-so-normal is this? I mean I put myself at risk and I do believe I know what the trigger was even as my mum has a history of prostitution and still is one and i had heard something very bad about her recently before this happened. Why did I do this risky thing and get into an iranian's car (nothing against iranians) and put myself at risk like that. ANYTHING could have happened! Was it another psychosis? It's not like me at all to do this I'm very shy although I used to do it A LOT in the past when I was more ill and on no meds. Should I tell my T about it, is there a risk I'll be institutionalised as I'm putting myself at risk? Plus my son even because this guy now he almost knows where I live now. Or do i possibly need my antipsychotics increased? I'm on 2 mg at the moment. Thanks for any comments or insight!

Sorry to hear! I'd up your meds for sure...since your on the lowest dose of each. You can go up to 375mg on Effexor and 16mg of Risperdal. Best of luck!

This happens to me too when I take medication. My husband just took me off of Paxil. I noticed NO DIFFERENCE whatsoever in myself. He said it was night and day. He said it took away all of my inhibitions (like alcohol does, and we all know what GREAT decisions we make while drunk) and I was unable to gauge consequences of my actions etc. I believe him because he knows me from the "outside". Although I still have not felt one difference. For me, getting off of it helped and I went back to normal.Hope this helps!

[serenity2298]

Originally Posted by Lightbulb7Seven

This happens to me too when I take medication. My husband just took me off of Paxil. I noticed NO DIFFERENCE whatsoever in myself. He said it was night and day. He said it took away all of my inhibitions (like alcohol does, and we all know what GREAT decisions we make while drunk) and I was unable to gauge consequences of my actions etc. I believe him because he knows me from the "outside". Although I still have not felt one difference. For me, getting off of it helped and I went back to normal.Hope this helps!

Thanks for your reply. Are you saying it might be the medications that caused this and not a psychosis?

It was for me, and if your medication is the right one for you hopefully you would not have been experiencing psychosis while taking it? Just guessing but makes sense. Since I stopped taking it a number of self control issues and awareness problems have subsided. I on the other hand did not have any perception of my behaviour being different.

[serenity2298]

Originally Posted by Lightbulb7Seven

It was for me, and if your medication is the right one for you hopefully you would not have been experiencing psychosis while taking it? Just guessing but makes sense. Since I stopped taking it a number of self control issues and awareness problems have subsided. I on the other hand did not have any perception of my behaviour being different.

Interesting! But you're right it kinda makes sense...