[KaylaLee]

I don't know what to do. Theoretically I can function. I go to lectures, do the work expected of me, socialise and get decent grades. But I feel so empty. When I'm with people I'm just playing a part, when I'm not I feel like everything is pointless. I can't seem to leave scabs or any kind of mark on my skin alone, to the point where I now can't wear shorts or low necked tops, and regularly debate getting a fringe to hide my forehead. My latest method (which worked at first to an extent) is trying to replace the compulsion with the only other thing I've come across which can occupy my thoughts to the same extent; calorie counting. But as the novelty is wearing off it occupies my thoughts less and less and just seems to be starting to be just another obsession. Whether I will lose control of that one too I don't know, but I don't want to stop as it is still having some replacement effect.
I feel like I have no identity - I don't have specific things I like in the same way other people do - there are plenty of things I like (or used to like) or am interested in but none are "favourites", all are things I can take or leave. I don't know who I am or where I want to be - everyone else seems to have such a clear idea of these things. I'm not close to anyone at university despite being almost half way through my second semester here - it's like I just can't make connections. All I know is that I don't want to drop out, but it's getting to a point where I feel I might have to do something just to make staying alive feel worthwhile.
I don't know what to do

[SeekerOfLife]

Originally Posted by KaylaLee

I don't know what to do. Theoretically I can function. I go to lectures, do the work expected of me, socialise and get decent grades. But I feel so empty. When I'm with people I'm just playing a part, when I'm not I feel like everything is pointless. I can't seem to leave scabs or any kind of mark on my skin alone, to the point where I now can't wear shorts or low necked tops, and regularly debate getting a fringe to hide my forehead. My latest method (which worked at first to an extent) is trying to replace the compulsion with the only other thing I've come across which can occupy my thoughts to the same extent; calorie counting. But as the novelty is wearing off it occupies my thoughts less and less and just seems to be starting to be just another obsession. Whether I will lose control of that one too I don't know, but I don't want to stop as it is still having some replacement effect.
I feel like I have no identity - I don't have specific things I like in the same way other people do - there are plenty of things I like (or used to like) or am interested in but none are "favourites", all are things I can take or leave. I don't know who I am or where I want to be - everyone else seems to have such a clear idea of these things. I'm not close to anyone at university despite being almost half way through my second semester here - it's like I just can't make connections. All I know is that I don't want to drop out, but it's getting to a point where I feel I might have to do something just to make staying alive feel worthwhile.
I don't know what to do

Sounds like anxiety and depression. There are forums for both here. Are you in therapy?

[Teacake]

The emptiness you feel is normal. You are young. We feel empty sometimes. Whatever fills the emptiness will be all the more satisfying for the discomfort of the emptiness

Calorie counting is a bore. Do you really look up and memorias the calories of everything you eat? Stop that. It will make you obnoxious company If you can only eat half a donut or look frightened at your friends latte. Work out and eat what you want.

For picking--trim your mails just a little too short. A nice short manicure just covers the fingertips. Trim just a little shorter than that will will make you crazy. It will feel uncomfortable. It will be inconvenient in a thousand ways. You wont be able to pick. When your nails grow If you pick you have to trim the one you picked with. Just a little too short so it grows back in a few days. Just a LITTLE too short. Not dangerously too short.

You can also get a good ointment to treat whatever you are picking.