hi everyone. business & stuff

Hello,

I'm new here. I struggle with depression, ptsd, and impulse control problems. I've been trying to do business for myself, independently, as I am not quite fit to work. I'm doing the auction thing and attempting to "network," as it were.

The problem is I don't think I'm much of a networker. I get paranoid and I start thinking everyone is looking to discredit me or expose my history as a "crazy person." This is getting in the way of my communications with buyers and business partners. I have sometimes sent emails and then thought, wait, what if that didn't make sense?

I am also very, very careful not to reveal any information about myself, but this might be keeping people from trusting me. I don't know because it's not like I can just come out and ask them! All this business stuff is so subtle. I am always getting the sense that people say one thing and mean something different.

Maybe this is just not for me, I don't know. I have been selling successfully though, and I enjoy it, except when I get too anxious about what people might think.

I'd appreciate feedback from anyone who is self-employed or involved in business... how do you handle it? Thanks.

cthonica

My answer to you doesn't have anything to do with self-employment, but... have you had therapy for your problems? Have you tried any meds that would help with your anxiety? That might be a good place to start and the rest could take care of itself with some proper perspectice on your part. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there without having problems to begin with.

Wish you luck.

<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

Hello, and thanks for your reply.

I am in therapy, and on antidepressant medication (Effexor), as well as a low dose of Seroquel. I was also recently prescribed Dexedrine to help with focus, impulse control, and the continuing depression. I think the Dexedrine helps me with those things, but also may be increasing my anxiety and paranoid thoughts. Hell of a tradeoff, huh?

Best regards.
cthonica

Hi cthonica, and welcome to the forums!

I have Bipolar II disorder and Anxiety, and like you, have found that dealing with customers, vendors, even co-workers can be a quite interesting ride. I do try to network, but only because right now I'm working as a contractor with no benefits at all, and I need a full-time job to get those. Networking make me uncomfortable. I'm sure that everyone I meet is taking an inventory of all my shortcomings. I've been very selective about the people in the business world that I've disclosed my disorders to, I have to feel I can trust them. I haven't been let down...yet. I also have my own business and none of my customers know about me, and they never will. I think I've told certain people that I work for because I don't want it to come back on me that I withheld information from an employer.

When you say that you do the auction thing, is it a face-to-face auction, or one that's online? How much direct contact do you have with your customers? Does it cause a lot of anxiety? If so, are you doing anything to deal with that? Meds are an option, meditation can help if you have good concentration techniques, breathing exercises are good too. You've also described some things that sound like ruminating thoughts to me. Those being thoughts that start with one thing and build to another, and another until they get out of control. Am I right about that? There are some meds to help with that, like Zyprexa, Geodon, Abilify. I'm sure there's others but that's what comes to mind.

This all being said, I am not a doctor, and you should take anything I say with rather large grains of salt . I'm just throwing out some ideas that you might talk to a doctor about.

I wish you all the best of luck, and I hope you'll let us know how this turns out. Again, welcome to the forums!

Greg