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#1
Jun 27, 2007, 05:31 PM
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Sorry I haven't been here lately. I am battling a deep depression and am isolating a lot right now. I am fighting right now not going back home to my little piece of the world. I am out at my parents house right now and will stay here until after supper then will flee home. I didn't go outside at all yesterday except to smoke. I don't smoke in the house. I didn't even go to the mailbox when the mailman came.
I am really trying to stay in the present and not dwell on thoughts I shouldn't be having. I am on daily contact with my T and usually end up having to call him several times during the day. I have an appointment with my pdoc in the morning and I am scared she is going to put me in the hospital. I don't want to go back because there aren't any places around here so I'd have to go to Little Rock which is 4 hours away and no one can come to see me because it is so far away. I am trying very hard right now to stay out of the hospital. I will try to force myself to come in more often and maybe that will help. Jbug
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I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#2
Jun 27, 2007, 07:36 PM
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((((((((( Jannie )))))))))
I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time. Please do what it the very best for you as far as the hospital is concerned. I have missed you. Hugs, Jan
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I still dream and I still hope, therefore I can take what comes today. Jan is in Lothlorien reading 'neath a mallorn tree. My avatar and signature were created for my use only and may not be copied or used by anyone else. |
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#3
Jun 28, 2007, 02:48 AM
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((( jbug )))
I hope you are feeling better today. It's good that you're getting outside even if just for a few minutes so congratulate yourself on that. Take good care of you! hugs |
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#4
Jun 28, 2007, 08:58 PM
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((((((((((((((( jannie )))))))))))))))
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#5
Jun 30, 2007, 11:12 AM
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Well I saw my pdoc on Thursday and I guess I freaked her out according to my T. She called him as soon as I left her office and I guess she has never called him before. She put me on Lunesta for sleep and a low dose of Strattera to help elevate the mood. She also increased my Risperdal Constant. I was like wtf I told her what I was going to do and she gives me more meds? I am on daily contact with my T still and he said if I don't call him he will call the police. So I guess I'd better call huh? The last few nights have been rough and I've called the crisis line except for last night when I just suffered through and ended up cutting. I figured it was the lesser of two evils. I am out at my parents house to babysit my dad LOL. My mom went to see her sister for the weekend and I need to cook for my dad at least its just lunch I need to do. My Grandma has invited us over for supper tonight.
Jbug
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I appreciate long walks especially when taken by people who annoy me. Noel Coward |
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#6
Jun 30, 2007, 12:49 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((jannie))))))))))))))))))))))))
I wish you well and hope that you can keep digging in harder and stronger to help yourself through this difficult time. Maybe the increase in meds is to help keep you out of the hospital hon. I pray they work for you. Take good care of YOU and know we're thinking about you. Hugsssss J |
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