[Fuzzybear]

To everyone who is thinking of leaving. I hope you stay, PC needs you!!!


Also, it's ok to change your mind. I hope everyone has learnt more tolerance and understanding of others from recent events here. And also as pegasus and Petunia suggested, there are different ways to express the pain of feeling hurt, ignored and so on.... I'm more than familiar with those feelings.....

Leaving posts do trigger me - my background was torn apart by abandonment. But that doesn't make me want people to leave because they may have posted saying they were leaving and then changed their mind. I haven't seen anyone here posting a "leaving" post intending to hurt anyone....

Love
Fuzzy

[MyBestKids2]

I have never thought of leaving permanently....If I need a break, I just take one...I don't make an announcement, I just go away for a few days. But thats just me, I tend to steer away from attention and kudos.

((((((fuzziestwuzziestbear)))))))))



Dee

Fuzzybear
Legendary Wise Elder
- Online! -

#34471 - 12/09/03 05:51 am

I don't get it

I have only seriously thought of leaving here a couple of times, but a few people I know told me recently that they often think of leaving the board they post on, because of feelings of not belonging, conflicts, other people leaving etc. Do you knowledgeable and excellent people think that this is a common phenomenon? How can we improve things here so that people are less likely to leave, unless, of course, they leave when they are truly happy. Maybe we can cut down on the "leaving" and "call out" posts then too, as if they keep occurring I know they irritate some people.....

I still think this is one of the best sites there is though. I might be quiet for a while, but although I will probably be in my (deeper) hole still, I will be watching over you, and thinking about you all.

Sorry for all the "bear" questions.

Take care,
Fuzzy
-------------------------

DocJohn
Administrator & Your Host
Offline

Re: I don't get it [Re: Fuzzybear]

#34478 - 12/09/03 08:29 am

Everyone feels like they need to leave a group sometime, if they are an active participant in it. Whether it's an online support community like this, or a professional networking group, or even a hobbyist group. We all feel burned out by the group's issues, dealing with specific people we might not get along with, and just seeing a lot of similar topics come up over and over again.

This is normal. It means you're reacting to the online community in a healthy way.

Typically what I (and many others) do when we feel this way is to simply take a break. You can announce it, but if you do, stick to your plans to take the break. You can also choose just to do it quietly (which is easier for many folks). Taking a break is a healthy way to reconnect with your own needs and putting things in perspective.

Especially if you find yourself posting that you're leaving time and time again, that's a good sign that it may be time for a break. One part of you clearly wants to get away for awhile, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'd suggest listening to that part, and take a break for awhile. Come back in a week or however long feels right for you. Everyone will still be here. You'll be missed, but it's often for the best. (Heck, I do it all the time, here and many other places online!)

Best,
DocJohn

----------

[Nikki2000]

(((((((((((((((((Fuzzybear))))))))))))))))

you make everything feel... well, warm and fuzzy!! thank you....

[Irine]

tell me something guys- i don`t understand- WHY IN THE WORLD do you make up all the "leaving here" issue? what is it good for?

seriously, i am sorry if i sound judgmental to you or insolting-it`s just that i can`t really get the concept behind it:

see, i leave a site becasue it DOESN`T INTEREST me any more. i have forums where i still have an account but don`t feel like coming there.

the things just HAPPENED BY ITSELF!
i don`t make a goodbye post saying "hey guys i am leaving here bey bye sorry hope you all understand"
it sounds more like you are FORCED TO LEAVE than you want to!
and here on the internet, i think that we all have the freedom to choose. we don`t work here or something. (except for the mods maybe)...so...that`s what i want to say.

it seems to me that members who post "i am leaving PC" don`t really want to leave PC, they want more attensions.

-and -please DON`T get me wrong- I DON`T SAY THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG with wanting attention! it`s o.k!
just the whole point of "leaving here" seems to me not exacly there

so really NO OFFENSE to all our "leaving" members...

[Gracey]

what she said. . .

Lady Mac. . .you should have seen the other threads.

[gostryter]

i'm not planning on going anywhere fuzzy...you'll have to light a stick uh dynamite under my hynie to get me to leave....

gost luvs fuzzy

[Fuzzybear]

[January]

Each of us have our own way of dealing with stress, whether that involves taking a week off and telling no one or leaving via a "goodbye" thread. It is really easy to sit back and judge another person when you don't live his/her life. There is no right or wrong here.

Let's all drop the issue and move on.

January

[Irine]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
January said:
There is no right or wrong here.

Let's all drop the issue and move on.

January

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

i couldn`t agree more. there is not right or wrong. it`s more what you feel like doing

i just think that most of the members who say they leave don`t really want to ....from what i see here most of then return.

so i think you nohtinkg to worry about Fuzzy. most of us are still here.... (and there are always nice new members too)