She will do well, she'll go far
Oh her, she's just one of the Maguire's (name changed, anonymity preserved)
I had never ever in my whole life been accused of being, a "mink." That side of my family had many respectable people with good jobs - police, managers, bakers, welder....
Your getting the sack...you never covered the phone properly....is she still here? I thought we were getting rid of her...OH *****
Last laugh is mine...except I am not laughing....such an anti-climax

Oh yeah, Stan...at least she is helpful
Don't worry the next carer actually has some experience
You better tell your team leader, no one seems to ever do it. I knew why she hit out, finding a client who had passed away would affect me too. Poorly. Crumbs. Hoover. Try the other side. The left hand doesn't know what the right is doing.

[Henry John]

Sorry you are plagued with this burden, SapphireRed.

[Jellyfish18]

I'd like to respond but can you sum up what happened, I didn't quite understand?

I made some school boy errors and was heading towards dismissal. I had cut down my meds and I had what's called the "self sabotage syndrome" because nothing good ever happened to me so if someone didn't ruin it I did it myself unconscious and unaware I was.
In hindsight if I hadn't had such a string of failures behind me I would have not accepted the job after my two weeks trial after seeing what I would be up against.
The company found out in no time I had been unwell, so I was ear marked. I was used to flak, underhand remarks and peoples games by then so I played along. It was never going to end well.

Then by some twist of fate I woke up one day. Like when the apple fell on Newton's head. I sent shockwaves through the health system and finally I had people on MY side, at last. I could not do this alone. I was done telling white lies, and living a lie, lying to myself...

I had my second major relapse. Lost my mind in order to regain my soul. this time was different I was not cast adrift on my own and I swallowed my pride and jumped through the hoops. I had brought too much attention on myself and people started to emerge from the woodwork. Can't run when the wells run dry

There's an obvious solution to this problem: change your surname. It might be harder for those who have close ties to their families or some type of pride in their heritage, but those of us who have been wronged by our families might find it easier to want to change it.

You could do something creative with it like change the surname to something similar but better sounding. For example, my surname is Brown but I plan on changing it to Black, both because Black sounds more professional (at least to me) and the name change would have a symbolic meaning to how much the hell I dealt with as a child has changed me.

I hope I gave you a unique perspective

My mother was very guilty of this, and her assumptions were usually extremely bigoted.

Every time I mentioned someone by first name she demanded to know their last. Then she would run a commentary on the ethnic/religious origin and her assumptions about the name. This was so frustrating and I would inform her that such thinking was prejudicial and not appropriate. I would also point out to her that her own surname was Scandinavian yet she herself was actually Scottish. "Mom," I would say, "last names mean nothing." But she would shake her head and go on about her extreme prejudicial assumptions and coinciding paranoia. I am not kidding here. This whole verbal transaction would happen every time I mentioned a name.

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by DarknessIsMyFriend

There's an obvious solution to this problem: change your surname. It might be harder for those who have close ties to their families or some type of pride in their heritage, but those of us who have been wronged by our families might find it easier to want to change it.

You could do something creative with it like change the surname to something similar but better sounding. For example, my surname is Brown but I plan on changing it to Black, both because Black sounds more professional (at least to me) and the name change would have a symbolic meaning to how much the hell I dealt with as a child has changed me.

I hope I gave you a unique perspective

I agree. You could change your surname. Best wishes.

[Junerain]

I, too, am judged by my last name. My father is the top dermatologist in the city. I just kind of passivley hoped someone would marry me, and give me a new last name.....I'm 44 now, and no one has been interested in marrying me yet.......

I would rather my parents changed my surname to my bro's dads name so we were both the same. People would ask me if your brother and sister why do you have different surnames? Different dads dumb f$%ks.
My mum and him split when I was barely two. I am a grown woman and he has just decided to stump up money to divorce. The two of them locked in some bitter feud for over twenty years. Why? Why hold onto ill feelings. But I am learning to let go of my grudges.
I still plan on suing the *** off the psych team at hospital. No offence to any individual doctor. But patients have rights. Twelve years, to get proper treatment, its disgusting.

For 16 years I had a five-member-three-surname-family. Blended family. I have always used my own name. My children have their father's of course and my then husband and his son had theirs.

We were constantly scrutinized and at times outright accused of trying to pull a scam - for example things like library cards and family memberships. The assumption was that we were trying to scam two family memberships for one.

Also, my parentage/guardianship of my own children and stepson constantly came into question. Travelling as a family was a nightmare.

I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time...

I'm with the above poster who seems to be confused as to what you're dealing with here...

More of a vent, maybe? Or maybe I'm just too stupid to understand.

You're right. I guess I came to the incorrect conclusions of what the original poster was getting at. Which is?