[MoxieDoxie]

........if you're willing to share, is your take on "burnout"...have you felt it and what did you feel led to it the most.

[MoxieDoxie]

If you are wondering why I am asking is because my ex-T who I moved out of state from and are actually long distance friends, emailed me this:

I'm giving a talk in May on "Burnout".

It's their topic but I'm going to be talking about how having an IFS "way of life" leads to less burnout. Having less extreme parts by witnessing how they HAD to do what they did at one time, and unburdening those parts helps to reduce burnout...

But what I'd like to hear, if you're willing to share, is your take on burnout...have you felt it and what did you feel led to it the most etc...

I told him I would post it to the forum I go to so he could have many different perspectives.

[mote.of.soul]

Hi MoxieDoxie. I actually think I've been burned out for half [maybe all] my life through just trying to deal with intense mental and emotional issues on top of all the regular day to day stresses that come along in life. I've definitely felt burned out and still do to an extent, but I think the inner spark is slowly returning. I think trauma can lead to burnout.

[MoxieDoxie]

Originally Posted by mote.of.soul

Hi MoxieDoxie. I actually think I've been burned out for half [maybe all] my life through just trying to deal with intense mental and emotional issues on top of all the regular day to day stresses that come along in life. I've definitely felt burned out and still do to an extent, but I think the inner spark is slowly returning. I think trauma can lead to burnout.

Right! I feel burnt out dealing with the battle in my head every waking minute. Battling dark thoughts, battling the empty feeling, battling the feeling of not belonging, battling the act of looking and behaving normal.

[mote.of.soul]

I so relate to that MoxieDoxie. All those feelings, feeling like you don't belong. I'm the same, I feel like the world doesn't even want me in it half the time. Such a long, long struggle. Hang in there please - at the end of the day, it's all mental turmoils, and illusions, I believe that. I hope you're going okay.

[MoxieDoxie]

Thanks. I am fine. I am high functioning. I get up everyday and do normal people stuff.

[mote.of.soul]

Okay, that's good. It's good to keep yourself busy.

[growlycat]

Do you mean any kind of burnout?

I had a bad case of work related burnout about two years ago. The job itself started as a dream job but with leadership changes the work culture changed.
For me, when my efforts were ramped up and ramped up with decreasing rewards that made the burnout snowball. I was working long hours but when my work was successful others claimed credit so I worked harder and harder. Even worse when I started to stumble and fall my failures were held up for the world to see and my many succcesses ignored or attributed to others

My health was affected I was not taking care of myself as all efforts went to double down at work. I ended up in intensive care for six days (health issue that exploded due to lack of self care).

When your efforts do not equal rewards or equal a punitive environment to me is the recipe for burnout

[eskielover]

My work burnout led to my major depression & anxiety.

I had worked as a computervdesign engineer for 15 years wuth some intense 80 hour weeks involved. I was mostly able to keep my sanity playing hard games of racquetball with the guys I worked with. I think the path to burnout started actually back in 1987 when I had to have my knee reconstructed after blowing iut my ACL. I recovered well & even played racquetball again but the energy it took to get through the PT & be athletically functuonal again started the burn out. The bad marriage I was in wasn't helping & a stable work environment was lacking, one air force contract was cancelled & the marine contract was slow in getting signed & new home expenses needed me to work. I managed to bide my time & the marine contract was in place so I went back to that company. It lasted till 1993. Then there was no good position available so thought I would try a new area in the company. I hated it & just made it to the Christmas shut-down. I just couldn't go back & kept calling in sick in hopes I would recover but it was not just burn-out, it was a breakdown along with it which was finaluzed when the Northridge earthquake hit in Jan 1994. I was already driving 1 1/2 hours to work on the HORRIBLE so. Calif. freeways which Im sure added to my issues too. When the earthquake hit, the bridge out of where I lived & the only route to work had collapsed along wirh damage to almost every road I took to get through the San Fernando valley where Northridge was located. I managed to ride into work wuth a neighbor 2 days after they semi got roads functioning. It was a 6 hour drive both ways & this department wasn't going to be flexible. My H was also out of wirk & looking for an engineering position. Aerospace in Calif was dying & no other companies wanted to hire those from aerospace.

I just closed my office door & cried (& I never cried) I cried all the way home from work on that long ride.

H finally got a job, I stayed home on Medical leave of absence but staying home didn't help becayuse then I felt trapped in my bad marriage. At that point was actually when burnout turned into total breakdown, one I never recoveted from while financially trapped in thst marriage.

When I finally was able to leave (it felt like escape) was the only time my healing started. I moves 2100 miles away to whete I could totally start life over & ehat a blessing that & good therapy has been. It has tsken 10 years to get to this point though I was actually mostly recovered at the 7 year point, things keep coming up though I am now well enough to deal with the divorce & finally force it through. New friends & awesome groups of supportive friends have helped too, something I never had before ever in my life.

I could go into the details about my marriage & my parents but will just say that growing up with a dad who very likely was ASD & marrying a H who definitely was creates serious challenges in life & when added to everything else just adds to the breaking point especially when there is no knowledge of skills to deal with it & it is made to seem NORMAL no matter how not normal it felt at gut level.