[pachyderm]

BBC - Future - What it takes to stand up to authority

...most of us are remarkably bad at standing up to authority. New research is revealing why this is, giving us insight into how the brain deals with – or fails to deal with – these difficult situations. Ultimately, the research could show us how we can train ourselves to become stronger-minded and better able to stick to our guns when needed.

[WishfulThinker66]

I have a great deal of trouble standing up for myself to authority. However, if someone else needs standing up for I can be incredibly assertive..

[BLUEDOVE]

Originally Posted by WishfulThinker66

I have a great deal of trouble standing up for myself to authority. However, if someone else needs standing up for I can be incredibly assertive..

A wee tip I read: "Before you meet the authority,think back
to time when you DID stand up for self or another--really
visualise it in your mind till you get the feeling inside."
Regards,
BLUEDOVE

[eskielover]

I have never had problems doing that which is surprising because my parents weren't goid at standing up for anything & when my dad did, he created a reality in his mind that was no where close to anyone elses reality.

Maybe I learned to stand up for myself because I knew my parents were incapable.

One time I stood up for myself & won, it was my first job in college, my mom said I can't believe you did that.....she was sure they had given her thebwrong baby in the hospital when they brought me home because I was nothing like them.

NOW, I state my case. Most times they stand their ground as I stand mine but I usually don't burn my bridge immediately. I usually part in a way I can think about it & decide how I actually want to handle the situation long term. Sometimes I go along, other times I keep my stand....depends on what is in MY best intetest.

Lol....in my divorce I hired a STRONG lawyer because after 33 + 11 years of dealing & fighting with an idiot, I need strong support legally in my standing up. I know when my standing up needs support but most times my independent personality is quite capable of logically defending my stand.

Had it out with my mom's oncoligist many times. He was a jerk.....I don't have respect for jerks no matter how much authority they have.

I have to say, I have gotten out of more tickets tgan I have received....I have learned what battles to pick & what ones not to. It has paid off.

Just a thought too.....the DBT section on interpersonal effectiveness has taught me valuable skills in standing up for myself in a way that works much better than before...helps organize thoughts

[eskielover]

Interesting....this study could also apply to our own internal authority voice....what we believe is right or wrong with our own choices we make. Like patents who chose to abuse their children. There is no authority figure telling them they have to do that but their own internal authority telling them to make that choice.

I also see as the concept of everything becoming relative thinking & that it could make persuading someone to do something they are told to do, more difficult because in their mind they are already saying what that person says is right for them....maybe it's ok for it to be right for me.

Without having STRONG convictions already formed on one's mind of what one knows is right or wrong it would be more difficult to stand to to someone in authority who tells you to do something that goes against what you truly believe.

I know that I have strong beliefs & no one not even authirity has ever bern able to make me sway from what I believe is right. I may pick my battles on the confrontation front....but my actions will never end up following what I believe is wrong. Greying the area of what people in their own mind see as right & wrong (brainwashing excluded) just seems like it would end up making the thought process to stand up or not all that much more difficult.

Just some thoughts.