[Lilly2]

Can you provide tips on how to (1) establish trust and (2) maintain trust? By "establishing trust" I mean the distinguishing of red flags from initial dialogue to get to know someone. By "maintaining trust" I mean the ongoing dialogue that could take place to maintain a certain level of trust with another person.

Although trust varies from the type of relationships we encounter, such as trust in marriages may differ substantially from trust in friendships, work relationships, peer relationships at school, therapeutic relationships, and online relationships here. It would be good to share some tips on establishing and maintaining trust.

The most critical element of trust includes communication, that is, if red flags are not present. That said, it would also be good to know what red flags we should look out for in certain relationships that preclude the establishment and/or maintenance of trust.

Identifying red flags becomes tricky when our own biases and hypervigilance misunderstands a situation and/or person. Sometimes we are too flexible with our boundaries and therefore too trusting, and sometimes we are too rigid with our boundaries that we distrusts most people. From what I've read on boundaries, "flexible" boundaries are the most ideal and healthy, which lies somewhere on the continuum between loose boundaries and rigid boundaries. See the link provided at the thread I started on boundaries here: https://psychcentralforums.com/self-...ose+boundaries

I'm now attempting to start a new thread on establishing and maintaining trust. It would appear that trust takes two to tango, maybe more. Trust should not fall solely on the responsibility of one person in any given relationship - at least as I understand it.

What do you all think?

[Blknblu]

Timely post for me, thanks for starting this thread.
Food for thought. Not too much to say, and will be journaling away today.

[Fuzzybear]

This is a good (and timely) post for me

I think I have varied at times between loose and rigid boundaries. I've been ''had'' when I've been too trusting and I have been hurt. Their intentions? I can't be sure since I'm not a mind reader

I was tricked for a long time by some irl. grrr. Very serious for a young cub. Not trivial in any sense.

I don't usually journal but will be reading this thread with interest. Thanks for the thoughtful and thought provoking thread Lilly (as always)

[Lilly2]

Thank you guys!

I struggle with these areas, so we're all in the same boat.

(((safe hugs)))

Fuzzybear, I'm so sorry that person hurt you IRL.

Blknblu, I hope your journaling helps!