[Emayham]

I have no education in sociology or psychology and would appreciate some insight from those who are. I am trying to put a balance to the tension between this article:How to Avoid Being a Victim
and victim blaming. I understand fully that we cannot control anothers person's choices and actions against us. But yet do we not own some responsibility to do our part to avoid becoming victims just as the article suggests?

[MsLady]

Can you post the link?

[Travelinglady]

Hi, emayham and welcome to Psych Central! Without further details, I can't say much. But I think as adults we can do things to avoid becoming victims.

[Have Hope]

Once one becomes a victim and is aware of it, then it's up to that person to decide that they are going to either stand up for themselves or exit from the situation entirely. To continue being a victim once one is aware, then it becomes that person's responsibility. And often times, victimhood cannot be helped.... any one of us can be a victim to deceit, or betrayal, abuse, sociopaths, and the like. One can certainly arm oneself with knowledge of red flags to look out for when meeting new people in order to avoid becoming a victim again. Knowledge = power and self-empowerment.

[sarahsweets]

Can you share the article for context?

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Emayham

I have no education in sociology or psychology and would appreciate some insight from those who are. I am trying to put a balance to the tension between this article:How to Avoid Being a Victim
and victim blaming. I understand fully that we cannot control anothers person's choices and actions against us. But yet do we not own some responsibility to do our part to avoid becoming victims just as the article suggests?

I'm struggling not to be a victim. I wish I knew how to stop being a victim.

[mote.of.soul]

Originally Posted by Emayham

I have no education in sociology or psychology and would appreciate some insight from those who are. I am trying to put a balance to the tension between this article:How to Avoid Being a Victim and victim blaming. I understand fully that we cannot control anothers person's choices and actions against us. But yet do we not own some responsibility to do our part to avoid becoming victims just as the article suggests?

Just going by what you've said here (I haven't read the article) it's always good to take responsibility, precautions, for ones safety and security to lessen the chances of becoming the victim of negative deeds or crimes, sure. But to go to the further extent of actually blaming oneself and the apparent victim for the harmful actions of an abusive person or a violent offender - no, you have to draw the line there. The responsibility falls on the person committing the harmful deed, not the recipient or victim.

Like a lot of things there might be a grey area in there somewhere too, but that's my basic understanding of it. It's called being a 'victim' for a reason.

[divine1966]

I think there is a difference between being a victim and having victim mentality.

When something happens to people that they have no control over like being hit by a car with no fault of your own, they are victims. That’s legitimately so. You are not to be blamed for being hit by a car by a reckless driver! But if you choose that to define your entire life with no attempts of improvement of anything in your life and your entire identity becomes “person who was hit by a car” then you choose to live by victim mentality

Some people become professional victims allowing it define their life and using that as an excuse for never growing up. That’s victim mentality. Saying that of course horrible things happen to people and people become victim of natural disasters and crimes and assaults etc Thats a sad reality. Victims aren’t to be blamed for what was perpetrated on them against their will

But life is about choices. You can make a choice to seek help and improve or you can live in misery and make victimhood your life long identity. Nothing good comes out of it