Breast Cancer; I wanted to check out but now I am really scared

I went to my family doctor today. First of all, he checked my urine. There was (hmmm) things in it that shouldnt be. I guess the jist of it was that my muscle is now "eating away". Not enough water intake or anything else for that matter. So off I went for blood work.
But that's nothing new. I found this lump in my right breast. I was not going to say anything but I need to know what it is. The look on my doctors face was enough. It is very large and has been there for a while. I just thought it was nothing, until now. Cancer runs in my family BIG TIME. After he felt it, he phoned for a mamogram. I don't want to go, I am scared now. I wish I had someone to come with me. My appointment is next Tuesday. First they are doing an ultrasound then the mamogram.
So here I am killing myself day by day, then this. I thought I was ready to die but I am not. I am so scared all I can do is cry.
Please hold my hand, maybe its only in thought but its real in my mind. All I can say is [censored]. Sorry but I wanted to edit this. Is this my punishment? Not everybody believes in a higher power, but I do. This bad feeling that I had, that something is going to happen to me, well this is it. I just know it. I hate these feelings I get.
When my Mother got sick with cancer, I had this nagging feeling before we even found out. The feeling was before she even told us that she was not feeling well. I get this a lot. 90% of the time, I am right. I can't see the future or anything; lol, but its these feelings I get.
This is it. This is what I was talking about.

Justy

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Justy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm going for a mamogram and ultra-sound this Friday at 8:30 am. You're not alone. What time is yours on Tuesday? We can hold hands.

Oh my. (((((((((((((((((((((September)))))))))))))))))))))). Will you let us know the outcome. Mine is on Tuesday, and yes we can hold hands.

Wishing you the best outcome. Its frightening isn't it?

Thinking of you,

Justy

It sure is frightening! Don't worry. I'll let you know what they say.

You didn't tell me what time of day your mamogram is... I'd like to be saying a prayer for you about that time.

I am holding your hand, Justy. And I will be with you in spirit and thought at your appointment. If I were near you, I would be with you in person.

((((((hugs)))))) Life is a treasure, sweetie. Value it. It's real.

Love to you,
Angela

I know this life is real, sometimes to much so. This just sucks. But you know, its what I deserve and that is that.
My appointment is at 10:15 (ultrasound) then mam at 11:15.

Justy

((((Justy))))

I'm so sorry you're going through this on top of everything else!

My, my, nothing but a swift kick in the chops to knock the wind right out of ya, huh?

I will be holding your hand, dear girl, in spirit. I will send up good thoughts for you at the times of your mam and your ultrasound. If you get too scared just think you have SEVERAL people here putting a spiritual arm around you

Try not to worry too much, easier said than done, but you have alot of people pulling for you and I think that makes alotta difference!

(((((JUSTY)))))

Take care of yourself.
Kimberly.

I'm here for you {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Justy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} You know how I feel about you. If it's not one thing, it's another. Life is really testing you right now. You say that you are not ready to die--I'm not ready for you to die either. Keep the fight. You have the spirit in you. And you have all of us. What time zone are you in? I didn't think to ask before. Hugs and prayers.

I have hugs and prayers to go around {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Septembermorn}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I care about you, too. You are special to so many people around here. You keep us posted as well. I can't imagine the scare you have ahead of you.

I'm holding your hand, too Sept!!! ((((((Hugs))))) I didn't see your post before for some reason

Justy~

From my heart I know how you feel. I went thru this about a year and a half ago and its all I can do to not find you and be there with you. I fortunately came out on the good end , Just fat necrosis . I hope and pray that this is what is going on for you too. I will be there with you however you need me to be.I too thought this was punishment , but its just another one of lifes things that get thrown at us to test our strength and faith I believe. You keep your chin up and know that whatever comes your way, you will make it . PM me if you need to ok ?

Hugz~ if that is ok
Tryin

Justy, I really hope that this does not end up being cancer. But if it is...there are treatments that are often very effective.

I'll be thinking about you.

Sorry for not reading your post fully, but I can tell you for the last 16 years I have had to have 2 mammograms vs the usual once a year most woman get, I have had numerous amounts of tumors and cysts (thankfully benign)and I really can understand your fear and frustration.
I happen to be one of those that have had to have ultrasounds, mammograms, biopsies, etc. to confirm crap, the best I can say is go for your mammograms, go for the ultra sounds, surgery,etc. in the very long run it removes the prolonged stress of "should of gone, what if?, when?, you know all those additional things that plague us.
Okay, bottom line, I wish yoou lots of love and luck with this, but do not let it go too long.

((((((((((((( itsjustme111 )))))))))))))))

((SeptemberMorn)) Sorry I missed your post too...

You know you can count on me to be there. You helped me out too! I'll be mentally holding hands with you and wishing you only the best.

(((Hugs)))

Take Care.
Kimberly

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Justy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'll be praying for you, especially at the times that you'll be having your tests. No matter what happens, we'll make it through.

Please try to take better care of yourself, ok? At least drink water, please! {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Justy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Inky}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} Thank you, Sweety. It's much appreciated.

No problem about not seeing my post. This one is about Justy anyway. {{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}} back atcha. Thanks for caring.

Nah, this is never about just one of us. I am wishing you all the best as well. I am sorry that you are going through this dear. We love you.

((((((((((((((((((((September))))))))))))))))))))

Justy

Thank you, Kimberly. Justy and I can't help but be okay with all of you wonderful people pulling for us. It still puts a smile on my face knowing I was thinking about you while you were in the dentist's chair helped you! I didn't have a panic attack while the dr. examined me either. {{{{{{{{{{{{Kim}}}}}}}}}}}}}

(((((((((((Justy)))))))))))
(((((((((((Tomi)))))))))))

((((((((((((Tomi and Justy)))))))))))))...

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Jillers!!}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} You're back! Aren't you?

Just wanted to thank everybody on this thread that stood by me and thought of me this morning. My answer to how it went is in the Kudos section because it was the first one I came to when I got home. Just too tired and in pain to post any more.

Love and hugs to all for your support! You're wonderful bunch of friends! Now it's Justy's turn, ya'll.