Talk to me

Hi Rainbowzz,
I'm having a kind of weird day, and I hope I don't put too many typos in here. I just upped my dose of tegretol, and it is making me so woozy. I feel like I'm on a cruise ship (without the good stuff like the buffet!). In a way it's really good, not the woozy stuff, but I found out I've been having a lot of difficulties because my med levels were sub therapeutic. Knowing it's the meds and not me, makes a huge difference, 'cause I've been crazy.

Okay, funny part about my day so far. Both my sons are home sick, and they kept asking me to get them things (which I was doing). Then they started laughing like silly at me. Apparently, together they decided to make all these requests cause my meds are making me dizzy and I look really funny walking around. They find this very amusing. I'm glad I caught onto them, but at least my dizziness is making somebody laugh

I hope your day goes better, and thanks for this thread. It's fun to read all the stories.

Best,
Kittkins9

No sign of paranoia in you, is there Tishie? LOLOL Good one!

Hey, Mandie, I'm sorry I didn't see this sooner or I would have talked your ear off! LOL

Two things I have to say; Got a massive shelving unit in my bedroom so that I can organize all my craft stuff. Organizing is something else again but it's fun.

The second isn't as nice. The mean, annoying neighbor across the street, the one that has called me "fat ***" came into my house yesterday while I was taking a nap and announced that he brought me some ice cream then proceeded to put it into my freezer! The gall of him!!! At least he didn't come looking through the house for me! I'm talking to him today for sure!

oh I wish I had seen this sooner!

Well, hmm let me think.

My sister taught the family's new dog Gus a trick!
She taught him to do a congo line, what she does is say Gus cha cha, and he stands up on his hind legs and places his front legs on her back and they do a congo line around the living room!!

((((((((((Rainbowz))))))))
I hope you are feeling better sweetie! Always here for you

Rainbowzz,

Did your little one inherit the gift of gab from you? I do believe your little one is getting about that age, the gab age

ide tell you my story but its really long and depressing.. but i will tell you i have chronic bronchitus.. fun. ive had it since december. lol

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a bad time. What's up?

I am depressed. Badly. And stressed. Was having a hard time with my little boy(I am a single parent) but thats gotten better. Unfortunately, the depression hasn't.

I saw an on call doc thats not my regular doc and i explained all of this to her, her diagnosis was i should lose weight and then i wouldn't have mood swings and anxiety. Totally overlooked my multiple diagnosis'. Her idea was benzos for a week and then i should be fine. Well guess what Im still not.

I am lower than a hole in the ground. I have no energy. I have no motivation. I can't be bothered to do anything. I look at the housework, sigh and go back to lying on the couch watching jeremy play.

I wish i could crawl into bed and sleep for a week or two, that would be very nice.

please everyone keep talking to me.

You are my source of connection to the outside world, and outside my head aside from a one year old. I need your chatter, it passes the day.

added:

I feel like throwing a temper tantrum because im not getting enough attention. So im sorry if im repeatedly posting everywhere. I just need connection.

hi. if you want to talk im here. i have no one to talk to and im feeling really down in the dumps. and i have been for a while now. my family and friends have no idea what is going on in my life right now and its really getting to me. i cant sleep. im not eating well and i have been cutting lately.
erin

I would rather talk about something positive

I think I want to become a writer. Writing is so good, to express feelings and thoughts. You discover more about yourself when you write. Have you thought about journaling rainbows??...

The rays of sunlight bounced off her mirror. No longer could she keep her eyes closed from the new day. Tired in body and mind, Nicole slowly slid out of bed, placing her aching feet on the cold hardwood floor. She stretched and yawned several times and told herself to move on with the day. It was already noon and she had plenty to do.

some of my story...

That is a nice and sweet parcel of writing, Nicole (?)

Okay, so i did a good thing.

I emailed both my cousin/birthcoach who does mental health work, and my aunt who is a nurse and has helped me out before.

I basically said everything thats been going on with me. The depression the anxiety, the thoughts, the addictions, the needing a break from jeremy. The problems with mom, the issues with jeremy, everything. I ASKED FOR HELP.. which was massively hard. but I did it. Now to wait for a response. I wish it wasnt the middle of the night so they would get it right away but I know they will get back to me.

So a step i guess. Still feel awful, like crawling into a hole.

I really think I need to be in the hospital. I am still awake. It is seven am. I feel awful.

I just really think that I need to get stabilized.

Cause im not. At all.

and im lonely.

((((((Rainbowzz))))))

Sometimes, the best place IS the hospital, to be stabilized. Thinking of you, Junerain

(((((Rainbowzz)))))

(((((((((((((((( Rainbowzz )))))))))))))))))

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HAHHAHAHAHA, ohh those are rich Anthony, I love the third one, it's hilarious...

((((((((Rainbowzz)))))))))

Today my intro to law enforcement class took a field trip to the state crime lab, it was really neat, TOTALLY different than what they show on t.v.
The coolest part was the firearms ballistics and crime scene department. They have this HUGE inside tank of water they use to get bullets from guns to see if there is a match to a gun they are investigating. It's six feet deep and it is really neat how it works. Our campus officer came with us, and got to shoot his gun into the tank and we got to see how they recover the bullets and make a match using the microscopes!

I hope you get to feeling better hun, here for you, sending lots of hugs and postive happy thoughts to you
Sparrow

thanks everyone for the words and the funnies

I did in fact go to the hospital to be assessed. They changed my meds which seems to be helping.. unfortunately because I was having thoughts of harming myself (although I wouldn't have acted on them) CPS got involved, and I am not allowed to have my son back until Tuesday.. I am managing though. I've been sleeping alot and wasting time online and watching trash television. sort of indulging myself. It does feel a bit like im being punished for getting help but im trying to counter that thinking, because really even though I said I wouldnt do anything I guess they can't just beleive me for the sake of beleiving me. And baby is with birth coach/cousin, so hes in a really great place.
I miss him dearly though.

sounds like you took care of yourself - good on you!

(((((Rainbowzz)))

You were right to be assessed, I do not know they had to 'punish' you this way- were you a good Mom in all the aspects, short of a few bad thoughts which we all have? I would miss my child, too, if I had one. Here's to a sooner than soon reunion of you and your little oneawwwww

(((Bowz))) Clyde loves you and his nephew