[mam855]

Dear all , i wish if u can help me or tell me whats wrong or what is my condition's diagnosis.

i moved before a year from my house "seperate" to an apartment which appeared to be unfortunately "noisy". Although i was tensed before discovering how noisy it was, but after hectic three months i had an adjustment disorder" i guess" . i heard there are no treatments but i used my family and friends' support. i lost lots of weight "12 KG's" and i smoked excessively and i was obsseses by the noisy apartment. i couldnt move the idea from my head even when i was travelling away from home. i kept running from home and hated the idea of spending time or watching TV in it. actually i still do. later last year i gained some of my weight and decreased my smoking but im still obssesed by the apartment and most of the time im thinking of it , negatively of course. my sleeping is always disrupted by my rude neighbours . i approached them several times but they didnt cooperate. the problem is im afraid to move and to face the same hectic noisy situation again, and to regret moving from my apartment which im kind off getting used to . This is my on going suffering , but returning to the past i can tell similar situations . when i changed my work to a night shift work i had the same problems '" depressed i guess , losing weight etc... " but the moment i quit i got better ! . i have the same condition when i want to take a major step in life like getting married , changing jobs... sometimes the symptoms start before i engage in the activity " when i sign my new job contract or when i date several times and START to think about getting married. i guess i suffer from tension a lot , and by the way i suffer since my childhood from UNILATERAL Hearing .
Please help

[madisgram]

hi, mam, and welcome to pc !! i think change is difficult for everybody so try not to be hard on yourself about having difficulties making decisions or moving or etc.
i am so sorry that the place you are living at now is so noisy. that would bug me too! can you approach the people that manage the property and explain to them the situation? that may be a viable solution for you. they take care of it, and you get some peace and peace of mind. everyone's home should be a place they look forward to being.
glad you have a supportive family. u are a lucky lady!
keep us posted on how you are doing, okay? we care about you!

[seeker1950]

Hi, Mam, and I also want to welcome you to PC.
All my life, I've been sensitive to noise, and I would have trouble in the situation you describe in your apartment. If you wish to continue to live there, and if complaints to the supervisor of the apartments (is there one?) do no good, then you might try adjusting to this in the manner that I have done at times in the past.
I teach middle school art, and for many years my classroom was next door to the band room. People would come into my room to visit, and the first thing they would ask is "How do you stand this noise?" And I would laugh and say, honestly, "I don't even hear it anymore." Which was true. I simply tuned it out. I don't know how I managed to do this, as I am truly sensitive to noise....can't abide noise in my home. But if I were in a situation you describe, I would attempt to do this.
I also recognize much of my own symptoms in what you describe regarding change. I have a lot of anxiety over such things as well...to the point that I avoid change if at all possible.
But!!!, when there is a situation beyond our control, such as the noise if you choose to remain in this apartment, perhaps practice tuning it out if at all possible.
Patty

[mam855]

Thanks Patty for your reply ,

Actually there is no supervisor in my building. i own the apartment and the noisy upstairs neighbours do, as well . do you think practice would work for me? i tried it before a year and 2 months but all i get is that my neighbours control my mood ! if they are quit i wake up good. if they dont i wake up down ... the idea of them controling me is driving me crazy

Originally Posted by seeker1950

Hi, Mam, and I also want to welcome you to PC.
All my life, I've been sensitive to noise, and I would have trouble in the situation you describe in your apartment. If you wish to continue to live there, and if complaints to the supervisor of the apartments (is there one?) do no good, then you might try adjusting to this in the manner that I have done at times in the past.
I teach middle school art, and for many years my classroom was next door to the band room. People would come into my room to visit, and the first thing they would ask is "How do you stand this noise?" And I would laugh and say, honestly, "I don't even hear it anymore." Which was true. I simply tuned it out. I don't know how I managed to do this, as I am truly sensitive to noise....can't abide noise in my home. But if I were in a situation you describe, I would attempt to do this.
I also recognize much of my own symptoms in what you describe regarding change. I have a lot of anxiety over such things as well...to the point that I avoid change if at all possible.
But!!!, when there is a situation beyond our control, such as the noise if you choose to remain in this apartment, perhaps practice tuning it out if at all possible.
Patty

[mam855]

thanks for your eply ,
first im a man and not a lady :::))))) mam are my initials . i hate going back home and my building has no supervisor . i own the apartment and i dont know where to go. i feel a bit better but still i hate my home .. i love when they are out "noisy neighbours" ...

Originally Posted by madisgram

hi, mam, and welcome to pc !! i think change is difficult for everybody so try not to be hard on yourself about having difficulties making decisions or moving or etc.
i am so sorry that the place you are living at now is so noisy. that would bug me too! can you approach the people that manage the property and explain to them the situation? that may be a viable solution for you. they take care of it, and you get some peace and peace of mind. everyone's home should be a place they look forward to being.
glad you have a supportive family. u are a lucky lady!
keep us posted on how you are doing, okay? we care about you!

[madisgram]

oh mam, so sorry!!!!......ok "man mam" so who does manage the complex for repairs and such? could you contact the owners of the complex? i'm just trying to figure out what if anything you can do like that.
if that is not a viable solution, that would leave you with 2 choices i believe...move out and expressly ask when you move to another place if the complex is noisy. walk around the place and listen...even go back at different times to "case out" the new place before moving there or not.
the other choice would be learn to abide with the noise and ignore it. as long as you are able to sleep at night without being disturbed perhaps you can get "de-sensitized" with the noise. moms learn to do this all the time with noisy children. when i visit my grandchildren i sometimes get tensed up with all the commotion. my daughter in law seems completely calm. why?.. she has become desensitized and it doesn't even bother her that she has a "bunch of wild indians" in the house.
keep us posted, k?

[mam855]

Thanks a dozen , i will try and try and try so .. god help me

Originally Posted by madisgram

oh mam, so sorry!!!!......ok "man mam" so who does manage the complex for repairs and such? could you contact the owners of the complex? i'm just trying to figure out what if anything you can do like that.
if that is not a viable solution, that would leave you with 2 choices i believe...move out and expressly ask when you move to another place if the complex is noisy. walk around the place and listen...even go back at different times to "case out" the new place before moving there or not.
the other choice would be learn to abide with the noise and ignore it. as long as you are able to sleep at night without being disturbed perhaps you can get "de-sensitized" with the noise. moms learn to do this all the time with noisy children. when i visit my grandchildren i sometimes get tensed up with all the commotion. my daughter in law seems completely calm. why?.. she has become desensitized and it doesn't even bother her that she has a "bunch of wild indians" in the house.
keep us posted, k?

[Capp]

Hi mam and welcome to PC!

Noise bothers me a lot also so I can relate to how this makes you feel...
There are times I have success in using "white sound" to block some of the noise. I've also tried using the soft ear plugs. It took some getting used to but it did help.

My best wishes for you to find an answer,
Cap

[AAAAA]

This would drive me absolutely crazy. If you are both owners of your apartments, are there any laws where you live reguarding quiet hours? If so I would get the police involved, it may seem petty but you are entitled to some peace in your own home.

[mam855]

well, i was thinking of some support , not telling it would drive you crazy : ) lol . anyways there arent laws and the police interfernce would make things worse coz i work at night and get back home at 3 am . if they abide by being quiet all night and start banging all day it would my life like real HELL .

Originally Posted by AAAAA

This would drive me absolutely crazy. If you are both owners of your apartments, are there any laws where you live reguarding quiet hours? If so I would get the police involved, it may seem petty but you are entitled to some peace in your own home.

[AAAAA]

LOL sorry, just letting you know you aren't alone I. I've worked shift work all my life and I know how difficult it is with the rest of the world thinking that their schedule is the only one that matters. One summer I was cleaning at about 10 pm, my neighbor came and complained that we both had our windows open and the sound of the steam cleaner was bothering him. I stopped, but I added that he remember that the next time he runs his wood chipper under my window when I'm trying to sleep at 9 am. He did move the wood chipper.

[mam855]

Dear AAAAA

Isnt it wonderful to have understanding neighbours : ) well, i dont . They mind their own business , but at the same time they made it clear , it is not their problem. Believe it or not , my mom owns the apartment above them so i took her keys and started banging at night , but they didnt care !!!! they told my mom they were moving normally and didnt mean to disturb me !!!! so i stopped banging coz it seems they are OK with noise : )

Originally Posted by AAAAA

LOL sorry, just letting you know you aren't alone I. I've worked shift work all my life and I know how difficult it is with the rest of the world thinking that their schedule is the only one that matters. One summer I was cleaning at about 10 pm, my neighbor came and complained that we both had our windows open and the sound of the steam cleaner was bothering him. I stopped, but I added that he remember that the next time he runs his wood chipper under my window when I'm trying to sleep at 9 am. He did move the wood chipper.

[AAAAA]

Yes, I'm pretty lucky now. It hasn't always been the case. When my husband was in the military we lived in an upstairs apartment of a 4-plex. Our downstairs neighbors played their music so loud that it vibrated my lamps off my end-tables. But they turned it off right at 10 pm so there was nothing we could do about it.

If you want to stay put, there might be another option. There are those noise dampening drop ceilings that are pretty easy to install and they work pretty well. Is this an option?

[Maxsam]

Originally Posted by mam855

Dear all , i wish if u can help me or tell me whats wrong or what is my condition's diagnosis.

i moved before a year from my house "seperate" to an apartment which appeared to be unfortunately "noisy". Although i was tensed before discovering how noisy it was, but after hectic three months i had an adjustment disorder" i guess" . i heard there are no treatments but i used my family and friends' support. i lost lots of weight "12 KG's" and i smoked excessively and i was obsseses by the noisy apartment. i couldnt move the idea from my head even when i was travelling away from home. i kept running from home and hated the idea of spending time or watching TV in it. actually i still do. later last year i gained some of my weight and decreased my smoking but im still obssesed by the apartment and most of the time im thinking of it , negatively of course. my sleeping is always disrupted by my rude neighbours . i approached them several times but they didnt cooperate. the problem is im afraid to move and to face the same hectic noisy situation again, and to regret moving from my apartment which im kind off getting used to . This is my on going suffering , but returning to the past i can tell similar situations . when i changed my work to a night shift work i had the same problems '" depressed i guess , losing weight etc... " but the moment i quit i got better ! . i have the same condition when i want to take a major step in life like getting married , changing jobs... sometimes the symptoms start before i engage in the activity " when i sign my new job contract or when i date several times and START to think about getting married. i guess i suffer from tension a lot , and by the way i suffer since my childhood from UNILATERAL Hearing .
Please help

That must be difficult for you.

[mam855]

im considering that, but i heard its not very efficient and it costs a lot . im afraid i lose money on it , and it doesnt work and then i would spend the money i have saved for moving from my apartment

Originally Posted by Maxsam

That must be difficult for you.

[AAAAA]

Well I think it depends upon a lot of factors. When my parents came to stay here I would have my sons double up and we'd take my eldest son's room, which happened to be directly under our room. It turns out that you could hear the TV from my room over the volume in his room, you could clearly undertand what was being said etc. I don't know how it didn't drive him crazy. We were doing renovations anyway so we added a new ceiling for him on the list.

His room is 16 ft x 12 ft and we got the least expensive sound dampening tiles out there and it was less than $100 for his room. It really did make a huge difference, not sound proof by any means, but it was a vast improvement. There are some pretty attractive ones out there now too that have a higher sound dampening rating.

Even if you only did one room, say your bedroom, that gave you a place to escape to some peace and quiet it might be well worth your investment.