Foster Mother Had PPD - Biological Mother Had Bipolar

Teal2018 · Apr 23, 2018, 01:44 AM

I have just found this forum from Wikipedia.

My foster mother definitely had PPD, it is only now I have a partner and child I understand a lot of things I had to endure was not normal. My mother loved me and raised me, and I will always love her. However it leaves a deep scar when you spend all your life constantly trying to make someone happy, and still get berated, belittled and told how to act, feel and respond.

The post of all people who have had mother's with PPD, ring true to my upbringing. My mother had no friends really, and she would quickly fall out with people. However she was quick to be overfriendly and compromising with new people, in ways which she would not be with the family.

I was fostered into a White family when I was 2, myself and my deaf brother and I was always told I would be sent back Whenever I did anything wrong. Life was amazing until I hit teens, then it became clear mum had issues dealing with my curiosity of my own culture and me being a girl. My mum had two boys of her own so was used to men and boys I guess.

There's too many things to list, but its the same as what you have all endured in your posts. Explosive behaviour, with no acknowledgement of why, apologies or the repurcussions on how the other person feels. Narcissistic behaviour, forever looking for compliments. Always dividing the family by constantly talking about everyone at different times....hence why my hearing is too acute now, and also why I can be distracted by dual conversations. Attaching gifts to favours. Over the top control. I was grounded when I was 21. The reason because I knew she would throw me out. Being told your stupid, useless, no common sense, yet allowing you to do nothing, even guilting you to going away to university.

Due to my father's death I don't talk to my mum, I took a risk which I knew she would never forgive and told my uncle he was dying. My mother had stopped them seeing each other for 15 years, after my uncle found a wife? Again my father had given into mum, so always went along with it with 'you know what your mother's Like'

In a nutshell it ended badly, my photos were removed from the house and I was banned from his wake. I don't speak to any of my brother's, just my uncle.

It still hurts to this day. Which I guess has only added to my own issues, as I have Indeed inherited her traits.

My biological mother has Bipolar, so I'm unsure where some of my issues come from. All I know is from the age of seven I had over the top paranoia, sometimes thinking there cameras behind my NKOTB poster. I never told anyone this.

Since my daughter's birth I have been in contact with my biological family. I have now found out, mental illness affects a lot of the members of my family. Which again helps explain a bit.

Randomly I love going out, throwing parties, being there for my mates. And lasted longer than I should of in large office and a lot of insecure women! I don't like people abusing my trust, I expect a lot from people as I give a lot (too much). ICan have an argument with a brick wall and over analysise stuff. Even getting lost in my own thoughts about injustices that have yet not even happened.

Reading these posts and hearing my partner say the same things about me is a shock, but a relief. My thoughts go out to all people affected by this, children, partners and relative's of PPD.