[CJR520]

I know that my parents are struggling so hard to stay in their home; and even with the part time caregiver they have, it is getting harder every day. They are both in bad shape; Mom has no short term memory left, and Dad has had strokes, and can't see very well. He is now trying to mow their huge lawn with a riding mower, and has broken something different on the mower each time he gets on it. We have tried to get them to move, and now, maybe we will have to force it before someone gets hurt. It is such a hard thing to see them like this.

[Perna]

Just remember, it's probably harder for you to watch than it actually is for them.

I remember when my stepmother would call me and we'd get into an argument and she'd hang up on me. But, she would call me back 5 minutes later and have forgotten and start talking about the subject again and I'd have a "second chance" not to upset her, knowing what would :-)

[NuckingFutz]

It is hard to watch your parents health decline. Sometimes safety becomes really a priority in a time like this. There are a lot of assisted care places that are more like apartments and they would have help when they needed it. Have you considered talking to them about something like that? Keep posting!

[muse]

That's probably one of the hardest things to go through with your parents. Remember, though, that so long as you visit them regularly wherever they end up living, they will be better off. That's really the most important thing though--make sure you talk to them once a week at least, and better yet visit them that often. It's hard for older folks to live without family around them, but in the long run, so long as they know you care and are nearby if they need you, you're doing the right thing in making sure they're safer.

[CJR520]

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

It is hard to watch your parents health decline. Sometimes safety becomes really a priority in a time like this. There are a lot of assisted care places that are more like apartments and they would have help when they needed it. Have you considered talking to them about something like that? Keep posting!

My sister, brother, and I all want them to go to assisted living to be safe, and have more things to do and people to talk to. The place we have picked is really nice, and has a bus that takes them places every day. It is just a very very good place. I would not mind living there myself, when I need extra help. The apartments are large and inviting and all have new paint and new carpet when they move in. We really think that it would help preserve some of Mom's memory to play cards, bingo, puzzles, etc. They can have their own furniture. We are trying and trying to talk them into it before winter hits again. We just really had a horrible winter with them, out in the country and constantly plowing them out, shoveling snow, and now a huge four acre or more lawn to mow. They can't drive, wouldn't move to a condo before, and things are getting harder all of the time. Dad is blaming us for everything that is going wrong, and the mower accidents he is having because he can't see. My sister came to Ohio to visit them from Wisconsin this week, and they treated her so bad that she came to my house to stay the last night. We are thinking that maybe if we quit babying them so much and let them try to figure things out, they will see that they just really can't. We are running to their house to fix the t.v. remote because they keep messing it up, they can't use their home phone very well, can't call for gas or make doctors appointments or remember them, can't manage meds, can't recongnize when the other guy has health issues. What a mess we have!!