[BlueFaith]

As many of you know my mother in law has been living with us for awhile now, and she has been so mean to me and driving everyone in the house crazy with her rude behavior. I mean every once in awhile she was ok, but not often. Well, today she is in the psychiatric hospital, because she was thretening to kill herself last night.

Here's my question:
How can I find a way for them to help her find a place on her own? After this, I don't want her coming back here to live. Can't they find her a place to go? Are there agencies she can get in touch with to help her find a place of her own? I mean like low income housing. Does anyone know of anything?

Because when she gets out of the hospital she can't come back to my home. She has to have somewhere to go.

Oh... Jenn! I can't give you any information on the subject... I don't know how things are working in US. But I can support you, by listening to you. Please PM me any time!!!!

(((((((((((((((((( Jenn )))))))))))))))))))

[LILITH]

Hello dear one! Yes talk to the Social Worker that Tell them she is a disruption to your family. It sounds like she is having mood swings...They might adjust her meds or start her on new ones. Depending on her age there are different options for her housing. PM me if you need to have more imformation.
Altheia

[bebop]

I totally agree with Lilith...call the social worker today!! they can only hold her for 72 hrs without her consent so you don't have alot of time. You have to take care of you and your family first!!!!!

[desirae]

I don't blame you for not welcoming her back into your home. Your home should be the one place that you can go and feel comfortable.

I don't know about your state where you reside but I do recommend calling your local DHHR (Department of Human Health and Resources), and asking to speak to a caseworker who could give you some resources to research for this situations. This is their job.

I hope all works out, obvisouly this lady needs some help. And you need a break!!

[SwallowedByConfusion]

and many hospitals have their own outpatient housing that you may be able to check out. It depends on the hospital of course but some do offer it as a way to help patients learn or relearn skills that are crucial to supporting themselves once they are released

good postings...good luck, xoxoxo pat

[January]

(((((((((( Jenn ))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry you're going through this. There are social workers at the hospital. They can find your MIL a place to live. State emphatically that she may not ever come back to your house to live, even temporarily.

Hugs,

Jan

[darkeyes]

(((((((((( MP ))))))))))))))
I haven't been up to date, I thought she was gone, sorry to hear she has been back.
I wish I had some valuable info, but I don't.
I hope you can get some info and help, it's not mentally healthy for you and her, and even your family to have to continue being her caregiver, and hear the nasty things she had said to you awhile back.
MP, you do not need this, and you shouldn't have to take her in for life, your lives are important, does your husband realize this? It helps when both understand, vs just the "daughter in law".
I'm sending you many good wishes for strength,patience and healing.
Love,
Roe

[(JD)]

DCF (Dept of Children and Families) helps with issues too.. you might also need to call your lawyer, for if your home has become her legal residence, you might have a problem....

The hospital could release her and she would be on the street... it's happened. The 72 hour hold can be extended if she continues ranting...that's up to the doctor. If she has medicare does she also have medicaid? There are 2 new programs that are funded through medicaid (medicaid waiver) that allow for in home care.... so she could live in her own place with a caregiver, rather than a nursing home...

You have many options. I hope your spouse is supportive in this particular decision. IMO it's a good one

[BlueFaith]

Okay, here's the update.
MIL has been in the hospital this entire time since Monday night. She's being released tomorrow morning. I called the hospital yesterday and explained the situation to a social worker. I asked if they could help find her a place to go. They said no. The reason why is because she has no source of income whatsoever. The social worker said she has to at least be bringing in a monthly disability check to be eligible for low income housing. She doesn't even qualify for a nursing home. I called and talked to her daughters, and they refuse to help her. They won't let her stay with them. She has no other family other than her 3 children (her 2 daughters, and her son... my husband). My husband and I have power of attorney for her. She doesn't have Medicare because she isn't old enough to get it yet.. she's only 56. And she only has limited Medicare (called TennCare here)... all she has is the mental health coverage through TennCare.

Another social worker from the hospital called me this morning and said that since we have legal power of attorney over her then WE have to make sure she has a safe place to go. And since she has no type of insurance or income to help pay for anywhere else, then I suppose she will be coming BACK to my house... GRRRR. I can't win with this one I don't think.

[seeker1950]

OH, my, I hate to hear you are going thru this. It sounds like a losing situation. I also hate hearing the recourses are so limited for you! I'm facing something similar with my own mother, who drives me bonkers and around whom I can only stand to be for a few minutes.
Please keep us updated.
Love
Patty

[darkeyes]

OMG, MP, I feel for you. I'm also POA for my mom, but fortunately she isn't in the situation your MIL is, oh man, this is rough.
It really is beat, when the rest of the family doesn't help,I know how that is, with mom, it's just my hubby and me, we do everything.
Mom is now in low income housing, gets rent charged according to her income, Soc.Security, it has helped her a lot, she has so many health issues, that Medicare is a blessing. She is 79, and worked most of life, I'm glad she is getting some sort of financial help.
MP, you are in my thoughts, please try to keep strong,even talk to someone to just release. I've even called my mom's social worker, when I'm emotionally lost, she coaches me and has access to further help with seniour services,etc. it helps to just vent to someone, Lord knows my brothers get tired of it, but heck they do not help at all, grrr!
Their lives must be nice to have weekends doing what they like and the time to do it, grrrrrrrrrrrrr!!
One only calls if he is high and wants to goof on someone or brag how he's ripping off the system, gr!
Okay I digressed, sorry.
I'm sorry to hear MIL's is not old enough for Medicare,that really stinks, does she get something but not enough of some help, that can leave her in low income bracket?
My mom's place isn't really bad, and the people in the complex are nice. I hope for your sake something will come along that will work for all.
Please take care, and know we are here.
Love,
Roe

((((((((((( MP ))))))))))))

[BlueFaith]

Thanks Roe and Patty. Yes, it's a hard situation. Think I'm gonna just pull my hair out.. lol. Maybe the new meds will help her, though. She wasn't on any meds before this. She's been diagnosed with bipolar and mild OCD. They have her on Celexa and Seroquel now. I just pray that this helps. Oh, and I meant to say she has limited Medicaid... not Medicare. lol

I just feel like my world is out of control. I hate that feeling. ICK..

[January]

Oh Jenn!!!!!!!!!!

I'm so sorry!!!!! What if you and your husband relinquished legal power of attorney. Then she'd be made a ward of the state if the daughters won't help.

Hugs,

Jan

[seeker1950]

That is a good suggestion, January. I'm the executrix (sp?) of my mother's estate and thinking about doing same.
Patty