[cannblevins]

I have a 24 yr old daughter that has been diagnosed with bipolar,schizophrenia,personality disorder,manic depressive etc. We have a crisis center (usually a 48hr to 72hr stay) where she has been several times, when they cant deal with her they send her to a Mental Institute (usually a 5 to 7 day stay). I am at my wits end. We have been on this merry go round for 3 yrs. She has purposefully overdosed twice and ended up in the ICU. She will be doing good and taking her meds and then she will take off and either drink or do drugs and we get a call to come get her because she has went off her rocker again. She hallucinates and thinks people are possessing other peoples bodies, camera's are set up everywhere watching her. My dilemna is when is enough enough? When she is doing good she makes a conscious decision to go mess up again. She is greedy and selfish. She meets guys on the internet and haves them pick her up. If I tell her she is not allowed to use my phone (you wouldnt believe some of the filthy texts and messages I have gotten from strangers) she pitches baby fits. The crazy thing is, she knows what she is doing. She wont act like that in front of certain people. She claims she doesnt remember how she ended up in the Mental Institute the last time. Yet when we were talking with her case manager and I brought up the strange guy she left with, she got mad and forgot she told me she didnt remember and started spouting off everything she had done leading up to her going the Mental Institute. One counseler says she is manipulating and its time to kick her to the curb. And another says its part of her disease. I am starting to think that she is just a selfish selfcentered individual who is using me and Im getting sick of it. She has left once again and my husband doesnt want her back in the house. He says it has taken a toll on me physically (it has) and that financially we cant do this anymore. Would I be wrong for telling her to either come and stay now before she loses her mind again or that she is no longer welcome here. I have not been able to work since this started and everytime I get her disability filled out we get to the point of her going to the S.S. doctor and she runs off again.At my wits end. She can think straight if its something she wants.

[SeekerOfLife]

She is of legal age. You are not responsible for her behavior. Sure, you still love her. But she is tearing up your heart. For your own sake, she needs to move out. I will be bold and say, that if it can be arranged have her move near a relative that is at least 500 miles away (someone who could help her settle in her own place. She is acting immature and expecting you to pick up the pieces. They used to call that tough love.

I knew a family many years ago that could not escape an abusive grandma! The husband and wife packed up and moved away when grandma was gone on a visit.

[Victoria'smom]

Have her case worker get her into a group home.

[shezbut]

I agree with the group home idea. There would be structure there, as well as some independence, as well as therapeutic support available daily. They would be in charge of medication intake as well.

I would definitely recommend taking this step before kicking her to the curb, so to speak. As, there are some real helpful options for people challenged with more significant mental illnesses that really could use a bit of extra help, but still have a better sense of independence & safety.

[Little Lulu]

It sounds like substance abuse is also a problem. If you have not already, I encourage you to try Al-Anon, a support program for families and friends of people with addictions (and mental health problems). You will meet other people there who have the same issues and you will get the support and love you need to make the changes necessary for your sanity. They meetings in nearly every city.

[cannblevins]

She has no insurance and no seems to be able to get her in a group home without it or disability. I have found a place that will take her (its women only) they will help her get a job and help with taking her to her appts and meds. They will also support this ongoing batlle to get diasabilty. The problem with this place and the group homes that will take her is that they are alll voluntary. She can walk away at anytime. I finally told her thats her only option, she cant come here. If she needs a roof then she can go to the womens place. On top of all this my son has flipped his rocker too and the last 2 days have been pure hell. This all started 3 yrs ago when they went to a party together, some drug they did that night blew thier minds. He went to prison for stealing and was released 2 weeks ago. Apparently he was on meds in prison but they released him without an order to get help and more meds. He got so crazy we gave him the option of getting help or getting out, he chose to leave (in a cop car) showed back up at 4 in the morning freezing. We took him to the crisis center but his heart rate and blood pressure was thru the roof so they wanted him in the hospital first he ended up running. The last I seen him security had him. I told them he was homeless. I was told they would get him put somewhere if they knew he had no other option. I am so scared one of them is going to end up dead.

[shezbut]

Wow! Sounds like you're dealing with some major stress with your adult children. That must be SO hard! I am sorry to hear that your son is also suffering from illness.

Very best wishes to your family!

[endoftheline]

So sorry, your daughter is so like mine in that I'm pretty sure she knows, most of the time, exactly what she's doing. She treats the whole family like crap, steals from us (more so me), and then turns around and uses the excuse that she's sick, she has no idea what she's doing, etc. and we're all mean to her. Now she's 31 and I just don't buy it anymore and life is way to short for all this.

[Helpbritt1]

I understand my daughter is 24. And uve sent her to sober grou homes paid by me she leaves..now she is in a psych hospital. And she has no place to go..but this time all i will do is love her ..i cant do this any more,,9000 this year spent on dr s ...er..rehabs...and sober homes..and here she is yet again..my heart is broken