[cap029]

Hello all! I'm new here and looking for support. I was in a relationship with someone who has bipolar for 3 years. We were best friends and loved each other very much. He even asked my dad if he could marry me. Then, everything changed when my dad passed away from Parkinson's disease. My ex went into a bad depression and basically disappeared from my life. Over the few months following my dad's death, he and I barely talked. He'd text or call once a month or so, but we didn't see each other. He was drinking more and more. He was not on medication for his bipolar and drank quite often to self medicate. He finally decided to check into rehab after he lost his job for showing up drunk. He wrote me a letter while in treatment saying I was the love of his life and he was going to do everything to make things right with me. I felt hopeful. I still wanted to be with him and believed we could work it out. About a week after he got out of rehab, he stopped communication with me again and would not respond to me. I found out through a Facebook picture that he met someone new. He continued to not answer me for months. He was barely speaking to his parents, also. It turns out, he met this girl on tinder, moved in with her a month later, moved to Florida with her (where she is from) a couple months after that, and now they are getting married next month. He's drinking again and I don't think he is doing anything to care for his bipolar. He has completely removed me from his life and blocked me on social media, all without an explanation. I know this is typical addict and bipolar behavior, but I'm very concerned about him. My theory is that he couldn't face me and the guilt he felt and it was much easier to start over with someone who didn't know him. I'm so heartbroken over this and still miss him everyday. Has anyone experienced a situation similar? I fear that he is running away and when it catches up to him, it will be worse than ever. I know it's out of my hands, but if anyone has any advice on how to cope or any stories to share, it would be greatly appreciated.

[Travelinglady]

Hi, cap029, and welcome to Psych Central! I guess no one here right now has had a similar experience.

I think your take on the situation is accurate. Alas, I believe you'd better let him go. Having a long-term relationship with a bipolar is difficult and often leads to divorce, if the couple marries.

I and my husband have bipolar. But we very carefully take our meds and stay in treatment.

I wish you well. Being with someone who is mentally healthier would be a lot better.

Maybe someone else will add something more soon.

[cap029]

Thank you, travelinglady. I know I'm probably better off without him (his own mother even told me that!), but it's still so hard and I still miss him. I have to keep reminding myself that he's not the same person anymore. I wouldn't want the person he is now anyway.