misdiagnosis?

Does anyone know where there is research available regarding studies between mental illness and poor parenting skills, such as failure to teach proper life, coping , listening and conversation skills? If a child is not taught these things, and learns on thier own how to get their needs met, even in an unhealthy way, and instead of getting the tools they need, end up on meds that cause even more negative behavior in the form of side-effects, how do we know that these people are mentally ill and not just immature adults with poor life skills? Aren't then these negative attention seeking devices revalidated each time there is a sucessful manipulation? If Johhny doesn't want to go to school, and is not sucessful with attempts to be allowed to stay home, then goes to school angry and acts out or threatens violence to himself or others, Johnny knows that he will be removed from school and his mission is accomplished. He can't think through the consequenses, but he knows that Mom or Dad will "rescue" him regardless. Johhny has in his mind sucessfully negotiatied his environment to suit himself, ended up getting his desired result, ie..Johhny is not in school, and has revalidated to himself that his methods are effective. Where is his incentive to change his behaviour? If this continues through adulthood, it is then interpreted as anti-social or sociopathic behavior.
I know this is risky ground to approach, but if over 10 years of drug therapy and countless placements in Group homes and long term care facilities aren't effective, then something eles has to be considered dosen't it?
I am desparate to 'Do no harm' here, but I'm also determined to not enable this negative cycle.
Any suggestions welcome

Poor parenting skills often include a level of neglect and contribute to many diagnoses and especially the Personality Disorder diganoses. Particularly Borderline Personality disorder, from what I've read.

That's why psychodynamic and psychoanalytic psychotherapies might provider kind of 'reparenting'.

I'd recommend this book: Understanding the Borderline Mother as well as a site www.guidetopsycholoby.com which has a great Q&A section, and of course there is much great information in the "disorders" box at the top of this page.

Lorisauntie, you hit upon one reason why I dislike the term of "mental illness." Many ppl who are struggling are labelled with the term, but really are quite normal for what they've been through and how they learned to cope. They will be normal for social settings and the like once they learn a better way, too.

Sky said: </font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Many ppl who are struggling are labelled with the term, but really are quite normal for what they've been through and how they learned to cope.

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lorisauntie, my link in my previous post is incorrect and should be: www.guidetopsychology.com.