Ending up in a padded room................

Its unbearable I will do something I wont be happy about. My mom isnt helping me at all she is making everything worst. I work through IHSS a state program to help the elderly. I cant deal being with her everyday she wont give me a break by working 2 or 3 days a week for her. She wonders why I hate spending time with her because I spend all my time with her. I am about to just check into the state hospital to get away from her. She cant understand that I cant survive with her everywhere I go. I cried myself all the way home from her house. She cant get or she wont get it I having a terrible time dealing with this situation. She doesnt even care. She says I love you, and it repells me I dont want to hear that from her again. I really believe that she is saying it for the sake of hearing herself say it so she will feel better. I dont want this life. I want my own life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. I want to quit this job and find abother and I have been on a search for a good 2 weeks now and nothing. I will keep going till I can quit this job and be free of her ties on me . I can not take her being a mother to me I dont need a mother now I need understanding in my circumstances and she has no understanding for me as she had no understanding for my siblings. This is not fair to me !!!!!!!!!!!!

Does IHSS have some kind of registry for caregivers? Would you consider helping someone other than your mother? It would give you the income you're looking for with some flexibility in your schedule. You might even find someone who would actually be grateful for your service.