I need some help please!

I have some behavior issues that are starting to really affect my life. I'm having problems at school, work, home, and socially. I really need some help and I'm sorry for such a long and chaotic post. I'll try and briefly go over my issues and make as much sense as possible.


I feel like I cannot talk to anyone socially. I can’t connect with someone and don't know how to talk to them. Most interactions are in awkward silence. I feel like I am so bad at it I just avoid all situations. It’s even like this with my parents and my best friend sometimes. It’s really awkward and I find myself hiding in my room. I only have one friend and it feels like I am close to losing him. I also haven't been in a relationship in almost five years.

My messiness and lack of motivation for everything is starting to become a problem. My parents are really close to kicking me out because of it. I feel the only reason they don't is that they fear I will do the same thing by myself and get even worse. At least with me living under their house they can watch out for me. My room and car are always trashed and it is so embarrassing.

I also feel like I am addicted to everything. I can't quit cigarettes and smoke way too much. I go on a lot of drug binges and my sleep pattern is super messed up. I usually drink about four cups of coffee everyday because the caffeine helps.


I honestly don't know what to do. I feel really hopeless and I'm going crazy with internalizing everything. I also feel really embarrassed and don't know how to approach my parents for help.

hi there.
if you don't feel you can actually just talk to your parents, can you write a letter saying what you need to say, leave it somewhere you know they'll find it, then maybe go out and do something that relaxes you for a while, gives them time to see it, read it, digest it. just a thought?