[rainwater]

So, I was driving home from work it was dark already but pulled up to a family dollar store to get a couple items. While shopping this man comes standing at end of the isle looking tired and saying he doesnt know why hes tired and needs to get some coffee as he was saying this to me i just smiled and knodded thinking yes I felt the same way and he walked away.

A few minutes passed I went up to pay and he was up at register paying for his items. Well I was next after him then he looked at me saying "are you following me"? I was uncomfortable by his remark as I only saw him when he came to my isle. Well, I opened my mouth and said what?, you came and talked to me in that isle over there.

This was the Scary part for me, he looked straight at me and threw himself at me telling me "Your simply Gorgeous" putting his around me to hug me! I pulled away and he started saying "are you doing anything later"? I just stood there Ptsd... couldnt talk until he left, and Frozen...

He was parked in front of store window I watched him although it was dark he turned his lights on not leaving though. I was so scared I told the store clerk I wasnt leaving the store until he left. She said would call someone walk me to my car and said a Stalker was bothering me. Then he wasnt in his car.. So, I hurried home with a vision of a maniac in my mind and Fear in my body thats right away Triggering all of the Physical and Sexual abuse in my life.. Now I am not again going to go to the store alone at night.. Its times like this I may never want to leave home because I cant wash away the memory..

Rainwater

[Nola22]

Dear Rainwater,

That sounds really awful! I'm sorry that happened to you while you were simply taking care of an everyday task like picking up a few items at the store. The guy's behavior was so creepy, unnecessary, and odd...and totally wrong. It's awful that a common little social interaction like acknowledging his need for coffee and offering him some understanding would make him think it's alright to do to you what he did. Again, I'm sorry.

Sending you lots of positive thoughts.

Hello, rainwater. I am so sorry.

[Perna]

That sure sounds scary! Glad you got home okay. I live in a difficult, mixed area and there are parts of it where one shouldn't go in the evening/night. I could imagine the Dollar General in that part of my town and what happened to you.

[rainwater]

Thanks for your caring support. Im feeling alot better after a good night sleep. Although I havent had to leave my apartment yet since when that happened last night. Im feeling detached from it maybe best for me put it behind me real quick and I made to big of a deal or got in a sudden state of shock over hardly nothing.. Im so whimpy and so tired of being someones target.. Rain

[rainwater]

It is unusual because this is not an unsafe place at all about 60 percent retired folks here in this central Florida community..

[invisigirl]

I am SO sorry, Rain.. that would be so scary!!

[skeksi]

Rain, you didn't make a big deal or get unreasonably upset. That man violated normal social boundaries and harassed you. Any woman would have been upset and fearful to some degree. Your worry was not unreasonable, either--bad enough he harass you, but to hang around outside the store? Creepy, inappropriate, and intimidating.

You did the right thing, it sounds like you handled it quite well. I am so glad you didn't walk out to the car alone and scared. Telling someone else what was happening and getting walked to your car was a really good idea.

[eskielover]

(((((rain))))),

Your reaction was right on.......even a person who hadn't gone through prior issues in their life would have reacted the same as you did. It's a big deal when someone crosses normal allowable boundaries in our life. Too many people minimize things that should truly effect us like this.

I have a post on here about 4 years ago when I was followed in my car for over 40 miles on one of the Los Angeles freeways.....the guy never touched me physically, but he sure effected me emotionally.....sadly he was mentally ill & the sheriff was able to take him to a place where he could get help....but he had just gotten out of jail the day before he followed me & had a drug record already. He told the sheriff that he recognized my car & wanted to make sure I got home safely.....he didn't even know me & was from a whole other part of the huge city of Los Angeles where I was living at the time. He definitely didn't know me.

Took me a long time before I was able to put that behind me & like I said, he never even physically touched me which would have made it even worse.....but I still remember to watch for people who may be following me especially now that I live in a very small town.

The good thing is that situations like this make us more aware of our surroundings & more protective of ourselves that we had taken for granted before.....the sad thing is that we have to feel the need to be more aware & more protective of ourselves.......grrrrrr

[oepika]

I actually went through something similar during the summer. It really is scary.
I was grocery shopping alone, when an older drunk guy came into my aisle. He kept muttering "Damn you're beautiful" and asked if I was warm enough and if I wanted to hook up later. I panicked and backed away, but he took me into a tight hug, kissed my cheek, and felt me up. It was so violating, since he looked in his late 30's. Anyway, I got security after him, and now he's not allowed at that store.
So, I definitely know how disarming it feels. I'm just really glad you made it out safely too. <3

[rainwater]

Oepika, so sorry to hear that you had same similar scary thing happen to you.
I hope your doing ok.. Now, I will not go to the store at night especially that I am alone wherever I go. Well, I had a flashback happen after this. When I was 20 years old went to walk to the public bus stop and some dude in a big cadillac across intersection yelled out of the window hey Beautiful.. I kept going. Well, a couple minutes later he pulled right up to the curb and got himself out and right up to me he had tons of big gold jewlery around his neckand rings on his hands, well he reached out to me in my space..a wad of cash saying beautiful what do you say we go buy you a bunch of nice clothes? I of course said no thank you..but I ran away so fast and like a scared shaking rabbit. I wish there was more I could do to feel safe. Thanks for listening, Rain

[oepika]

Oh dear, that is rather panic-inducing. :/ You're definitely not alone, though, even if it sometimes feels that way. You did a great job by turning down his offer and getting yourself out of that situation. It's still scary, but it was the best thing you could have done. If you ever want to talk or vent, feel free to message me. I'm here for you, hun, and so are the other members here.

[Healing my Heart]

Truly, you should be patting yourself on the back. You did the right thing, you made sure that you didn't go out alone. That was such a smart decision!

[Stanley_19802]

Hello Rainwater,

I am very sorry that happened to you. I think that would make anyone uncomfortable. I don't like to be touched by people I don't know either. A suggestion to help you feel a bit safer? Many gun stores or security type shops, maybe even Walmart often carry pepper spray cans. I got a small keychain type on. To use, you just turn the little tab over and squeeze. Due to my own PTSD, I avoid major groups of people and typically choose to shop at 24 hour places from about 2am-4am to do food shopping or what not. But because it's night time, it's always a risk to go out at night. But at least knowing you have pepper spray should someone attempt to do harm, you can spray them and quickly get to safety. The one I have sprays a red dye with it so a suspect can be ID'ed. Just be sure to check local laws (call a local police station) and find out what percent of pepper spray that you are allowed to carry by law. I carry one of 8%. Each state and country is different so do check so you don't break any laws. I am glad to hear you got home safely. Take care.

-Stanley