Can't calm down...

I can't even go to therapy and feel calm. I hate waiting and watching people walk pass me. The nervousness and paranoia kicks me. I think everyone is a threat. I feel like I can't trust anyone. I feel like everyone is laughing at me. They think I'm a joke and I feel like I don't even deserve to be in therapy. I have no idea what is wrong with me. I accidentally saw my notes today and it said I had ptsd. I don't even remember sharing about any traumatic incidents, I don't know why they wrote that. I have no idea which thoughts are real and which aren't. Am I just being paranoid or is this all true? Just so tired of having to live like this. I wish someone who has been through this can tell me for sure that I'm just being paranoid. I wish someone could give me all the answers to what is going on. Am I really going crazy??

I'm so sorry to hear you are in such pain. Are you seeing a psychiatist, too? Are you taking any medication that could not be working correctly? Therapy is good but being seen by a doctor sounds like the thing to do. If you have a psychiatrist already give him a call now. There should be something that can be done to help you. Best wishes.
Gayle

((wolfie25)),

PTSD is an anxiety disorder and it sounds like you are having a lot of anxiety attacks and you feel very uncomfortable around other people. I have experienced that myself, yes I thought I was going "crazy" too. You can slowly learn how to gain more control over these attacks and learn "not to feed into them".

You are reacting to these attacks by being "more fearful" so therefore you are continuing to flood your brain with "cortisol" which is what our brains do to prepare us for "flight or fight". You can learn to "distract" your thoughts to "things that have no signals of need to prepare for flight, which will signal your brain to stop producing cortisol and you will slowly "calm down again".

I hope you are still seeing a therapist who can teach you "self soothing" techniques so you can learn how to "self calm instead of feeding into the anxiety".

(((Hugs)))
OE

I am sorry you are going threw this.I tend to go threw this A LOT.I wish the same as you that we could get answer's.You are not alone.

I don't know what else to say but