Non-Combat Military PTSD?

Hi all. Anyone have military experiences that exacerbated existing PTSD or that caused PTSD but wasn't combat?

My PTSD story is a little convoluted so hang in there with me ok?

The shortest story I can make it: When I was 16 I was abused terribly by a boyfriend for a year. I joined the military in 2006, and during my 4 years in I was sexually assaulted and threatened with bodily harm by my fellow soldiers, and emotionally manipulated by my then-husband. All of this brought up the feelings of when I was 16 and it really messed me up. I was a walking rage bomb.

During this time I was Dx'd with bipolar disorder and they began my med board.

Once I was out, I started showing classic signs of PTSD, but since I had never deployed I wasn't ever screened for it, nor would I be officially Dx'd since it's not "combat related". I'm afraid that if I push for this diagnosis they will change my other Dx too, leaving me without benefits (60% for BPD and nerve damage from training)

Should I push for a real Dx? I feel like since it wasn't combat related it wasn't technically the military's fault, and if I go after any of their programs I'll be taking a slot away from a solider who really needs it. I already feel so much damn guilt for the resources I already use, since I know many soldiers who have it way worse than I do. I can at least walk.

Does anyone else ever deal with this kind of guilt? I know I earned it, sort of, but I can't shake this feeling that so many people have it worse than me so I should suck it up and deal.

I would say to pursue it because you were once in the military and it does have a connection.

My story is similar to yours. I got out, and sort of blew it off, all the other ideas of "sucking it up" IMHO will follow you into your civilian life, at least it did for me.
"worse than you" ))))))))))))))))(((((((((((((((((( you deserve to live a healthy life too.

Good luck to you, and I wish you well.

regards
Jade

Me too, folks, I went thru some similar stuff and received treatment for it, tho was not rewarded compensation. However, the therapy was very helpful. I was going thru this before Iraq and Afghanistan, so times were a little different then. But it is still a trauma. If you are interested in pursuing, you might look for an organization called Vetwow. They are on FB and used to have a website. There was a lot of support and info from these people. Also have BP as a primary DX. The best!

I think one won't tale away the other,I hope...

Sent from my VS920 4G using Tapatalk 2

" I know I earned it, sort of, but I can't shake this feeling that so many people have it worse than me so I should suck it up and deal. " quote LionLion

This is the mentality that gets you into trouble, this is "victim mentality" and why you keep getting abused too.

You suffered "abuse" when you were in the service. So just because your PTSD is not combat related, your time in the service "did severely affect you". This problem is being recognized more and more out in the open now.

I am not convinced you actually suffer from bipolar either. When someone is "abused" they develop a "coping pattern" that is often "mistaken" for bipolar disorder.

If you search Sanctuary for the Abused and make sure you put in the date Sunday, March 31, 2013, there is a really good article that explains what happens from being abused and developing "complex PTSD".

The truth is "you are worth it" when you reach out for help. Don't even entertain guilt about it either.

(((Caring Hugs)))
OE

To be honest, I'm not sure either. I mean, yes, I have intense moods that swing from high to low to left to right. But the more I talk to people, the more I research on my own (I love researching stuff) and the more SSRIs I was stacked on that never sent me into a manic state, I just started thinking maybe it's not right. I'm better, even-keeled, on my current cocktail (Lithium600mg+Buproprion450mg) and I do sink into a morass of dark apathetic depression when I skip more than one dose, but that could easily be withdrawal.

I will search out that article you mentioned. I've never read about prior abuse victims developing coping mechs that mimic bipolar disorder. I've often thought I actually had borderline personality disorder, but as soon as I mentioned that thought both my pdoc and shrink batted it down like a mean cat. I've read that abuse victims can develop a borderline personality due to their experiences.

I know that my feelings of "it's not that bad, there's lots of people worse off than me" will get me in trouble some day. I had to have my stomach herniate inside of my esophagus before I'd go bother my doc about my acid reflux. I honestly try to keep telling myself that I am a proud veteran, and I deserve what my country has given me. I'm working towards a Masters in psychology, actually, with the express purpose to go back to the VA to work in their Mental Health Clinic. That is something I can do to make myself feel valued.

Thanks and hugs to everyone. This has been weighing on me for some time and it's great to tell it to people who can understand.