I don't actually see any possibility for "cure" and "management", well, it sucks.

Hellion · Jun 22, 2014, 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacake

There is a compelling symptom of PTSD called "repetition compulsion". Freud discussed it. I have experienced it myself. My compulsion is about "making a bully stand down". It is hugely satisfying. It could be retraumatising if I made an error and stood up to a bully who didn't back down. To date they all have. I think it is not wrong to tell a sufferer of PTSD to be aware that powerful unconscious motivations affect us all.

People do like to complain. Think about it. We "ventilate" it, hopefully to willing participants, and we get stress relief. We get reassured that we are OK and reasonable and it wasn't our fault. Stronger egos turn a moment of awkwardness into a moment of comedy and move on. Weaker egos take complaining more seriously. It's possible all our complaints reflect our early childhoods. Certainly our constant refrains do. My constant lament is people are dumb and don't help me. That's a gifted child whose educational needs are neglected. (they used to think enrichment was good enough). I like to complain from weak ego spots and strong ego spots. It's the weak ego spots we want to recognise and not loop in childhood stuff.

Freuds theories don't all exactly hold up...there have been quite a few advancements in knowledge about psychological disorders since his time. So I am sure there are unconscious motivations but in my opinion Freud got a little carried away with that been a while since I actually learned about that in psychology.

Also maybe in that context people in a sense 'enjoy' complaining in the sense it lets them vent some of that negative energy out...but I think most people would prefer the situation causing their complaining didn't occur in the first place so they would not need to vent out that negative energy. I mean if I go to therapy and its not helping its not like I enjoy that it didn't help so now I have some excuse to complain...it would be preferable if it was helpful, thus far it really hasn't been.

Jun 22, 2014, 10:10 PM

Not only that but I don't like to talk about my traumas. And I don't put down cpt it works for some ppl. Just didn't for me. I've only complained to maybe 2 ppl irl, about how now I feel worse.

Teacake · Jun 23, 2014, 01:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hellion

Freuds theories don't all exactly hold up...there have been quite a few advancements in knowledge about psychological disorders since his time. So I am sure there are unconscious motivations but in my opinion Freud got a little carried away with that been a while since I actually learned about that in psychology.

Also maybe in that context people in a sense 'enjoy' complaining in the sense it lets them vent some of that negative energy out...but I think most people would prefer the situation causing their complaining didn't occur in the first place so they would not need to vent out that negative energy. I mean if I go to therapy and its not helping its not like I enjoy that it didn't help so now I have some excuse to complain...it would be preferable if it was helpful, thus far it really hasn't been.

Repetition compulsion has held up. Animals do it too.

People complain about the weather. It gives us something to talk about.

If therapy isnt helpful find a somatic therapist. There are many in Colorado.

Teacake · Jun 23, 2014, 01:52 AM

Being in touch with emotions can be exhausting. I raised a gifted son. I remember days, sometimes whole weeks of really hard emotional work. I got housecleaning down to an hour a day and I worked out and cooked but there were whole days the thing on my mind was what was going on in kiddo's. I was very surprised by emotional work of being a full time mother. That alone was a full time job.

The kiddo is a successful well adjusted guy. I had to hit him up for money last week. Believe me I o why some mothers keep paying into social security at any emotional cost. It's humiliating and scary to be busted flat in midlife. But...no amount of money could ever compensate me if the kiddo were the one with the broken life because I had my head up my career. I've seen that tragedy too many times.

Hellion · Jun 23, 2014, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacake

Repetition compulsion has held up. Animals do it too.

People complain about the weather. It gives us something to talk about.

If therapy isnt helpful find a somatic therapist. There are many in Colorado.

I am a bit fuzzy on what exactly repetition compulsion is...

Also people complaining about the whether is quite a bit different than complaining about things like therapy not being effective or not working at all, though most conversations I hear don't really start with complaining about weather per say.

Not sure what a somatic therapist is, if there are any in my area of Colorado or if medicaid covers it....perhaps worth looking into but even then what is to say that would be all that much more helpful? My point is I doubt people commonly go to therapy they know wont work, just so they can complain about it. As in I do not think there was some unconcious motivation to seek out therapy I know wont work just so I can complain about it not working....I actually found what was availibile in my area that i could afford and hoped it would help thus far I cant really say it has...still in the process of trying to figure out where to go from here.

Jun 23, 2014, 02:36 PM

[quote=MotownJohnny;3817221]Is this seriously ALL I can look forward to the rest of my life, being set off by any odd random event, and feeling like crap for days or weeks or months or forever?

I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling this way, Mo-Jo. But I know what it's like. I'm feeling it especially strongly today as well. (Maybe it's the alignment of the stars?) A fair amount of the time, I'm just in a state I call: "dull acceptance". But then there are other times when I feel like I just can't stand it for another minute!

I know there's no cure. And, at least so far, there doesn't even seem to be much of anything in the way of management, & no one who really gives a rip either. So, at this point, I'm relying on Pema Chodron to get me through. Hey... it's not perfect... but no one's offering any better solutions. So The Skeez is holding his seat.

I hope that you find something that will make your circumstances feel at least more tolerable, even if true healing is not to be had.

Restin · Jun 23, 2014, 05:06 PM

I especially noticed one thing in your post. You want to quit doing what everybody in the family expects you to do just to please them! That's a step. Also, as discouraged as you are, it would help to get into therapy. No, I don't think you can be that down and expect to just lift yourself by your bootstraps. I was so touched by your complaints about life. Every one touched a chord in my heart, as I went thru hell myself for about a decade. I will say, tho, therapy saved my life!

Teacake · Jun 23, 2014, 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hellion

I am a bit fuzzy on what exactly repetition compulsion is...

Also people complaining about the whether is quite a bit different than complaining about things like therapy not being effective or not working at all, though most conversations I hear don't really start with complaining about weather per say.

Not sure what a somatic therapist is, if there are any in my area of Colorado or if medicaid covers it....perhaps worth looking into but even then what is to say that would be all that much more helpful? My point is I doubt people commonly go to therapy they know wont work, just so they can complain about it. As in I do not think there was some unconcious motivation to seek out therapy I know wont work just so I can complain about it not working....I actually found what was availibile in my area that i could afford and hoped it would help thus far I cant really say it has...still in the process of trying to figure out where to go from here.

Look on traumaprevention.com for Berceli practioners. If you can get to Boulder the drop in workshop is free or donation. There have been inexpensive drop in workshops in Carbondale. Probably elsewhere. You dont actually need a teacher. You can learn from David's book. Its on Kindle. Or ask your library to purchase it.

I also really like Peter Levines audio CDs. If your library doesnt have them they ought to purchase them.

Medicaid is frustrating. Ive been happy with my doctor, which is something.

If you want to share what county you are in or city you are near is be happy to help look for someone near you. Sometimes its easier to help another than to help oneself.

I retract whatever I said about complaining. Some people do but we are concernedq with ús and all of us are looking for a good life and á cure.

Jun 24, 2014, 10:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MotownJohnny

Thank you for the kind sentiments.

Maybe the problem is that ... I'm searching for a solution that doesn't really exist. Perhaps I should just accept this for what it is, and let it just "be".

I know metaphorically running on a treadmill chasing a vision of "cure" just isn't getting me anywhere.

Has anyone ever just walked away from all of the "treatment", said "to Hell with it," dropped the therapists, doctors, medications and had it work?

"A big part of me says "crazy is as crazy does" (a la Forrest Gump), and if I stop "acting crazy" by seeing therapists and doctors and chasing after some "cure", and just live a normal, day to day life and try to FORGET about it all, let it stay in the past, and just deal with the triggers in my own way, recognizing them for the ghosts of the past that they are, I would be so much better off? Time to take my toys and go home?

"

What is a normal life?? Obviously if it was that easy you wouldnt be going to a therapist in the first place. I thought the same thing, I dont think you can go back.

Hellion · Jun 24, 2014, 11:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teacake

Look on traumaprevention.com for Berceli practioners. If you can get to Boulder the drop in workshop is free or donation. There have been inexpensive drop in workshops in Carbondale. Probably elsewhere. You dont actually need a teacher. You can learn from David's book. Its on Kindle. Or ask your library to purchase it.

I also really like Peter Levines audio CDs. If your library doesnt have them they ought to purchase them.

Medicaid is frustrating. Ive been happy with my doctor, which is something.

If you want to share what county you are in or city you are near is be happy to help look for someone near you. Sometimes its easier to help another than to help oneself.

I retract whatever I said about complaining. Some people do but we are concernedq with ús and all of us are looking for a good life and á cure.

Yeah I could look at a book on it, and see what I think I am rather open minded towards non CBT approaches since that one just doesn't do much. I live west of denver and don't drive and busing to bolder is quite the hassle I've done it a couple times...that and of course finding my way around boulder would be very difficult.

Menu

I don't actually see any possibility for "cure" and "management", well, it sucks.

My Support Forums