Braced

(((((((((((((( Petunia )))))))))))))

((( Fuzzy )))

Thanks. I'm just...sigh.

actually pet......i think that removing her from your email would be a positive step....it in no way minimizes your feelings for her but would be a positive step in the realization that she sadly is gone....of course on the other hand.if you feel the need to "hang on" a while longer....there is nothing wrong with that also......

((((( Petunia )))))

(((Petunia))) It's been only a short time... don't push yourself. I think getting some medication help would be good.. get just a few? I think doing it that way you can begin to realize that you can trust yourself. You are not your family. If you were, you wouldn't be still concerned over drug matters (they never were.)

((( Julia )))

A friend gave me some good advice to set up a folder for just her emails.

That way I can take her out of my address book but not delete her completely.

It was because I saw her name every time I'd send someone an email and it hurt/hurts.

((( Always )))

I have to tell you, the Questions Only game today helped me escape for a while. Thanks.

You are not your family

Somewhere inside me I know this.

Petunia, Ty for always being there on the game threads for me. I know I am new. It has meant so much to me. I really can not explain it. Hope it was ok to post here?

((( muffy )))

Sure it's ok to post here.

(((((((((((((((( Petunia ))))))))))))))))

Learning that you (me, everyone) are an autonomous being is a big realization.

Though the years not only has family remarked at my not following family rules, but even have outsiders say such "rules" to me as "MY mother said when in a steak house restaurant, one should eat steak." To which I usually reply, I grew out of my family's rules and make my own now. I eat what I want.

Though I am eccentric, everyone can make their "own rules." That's a right of adulthood.

I see P-doc next week. I'll print some of this and hand it to her.

Thanks everyone.

((((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))
Your the best. Tell the Dr. that!

"Braced " provoked me to feel many emotions and tears in my eyes. But I don't always allow those tears to flow down my cheeks. You should write a poem. Then I read on to your reason of this "braced" I too am currently waiting for the tests from my mom and sister. They are both cancer survivors. We just went through this scare of the chemo therapy and radiation with my sister last summer. And we are waiting on blood work for myself, but it is not for cancer but I have a chronic illness called Fibromyalgia and We continue not to rule out Lupus entirely amongst other things.So thanks for helping me to remember why I am "braced."

Smilie

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I'll print some of this and hand it to her.


</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> With my incorrect grammar and all??? LOL Oh well, even I have bad days. (and fingers)

TC

No worries, _Sky, lol. I'm just taking what I wrote.

Smilie, I'm sorry you are dealing with some of the same issues.

I hope you can slump real soon Petunia

Thanks girls.

Abandoned by the dead. I know that feeling all to well. Thanks for sharing.

Smilie

After finding out that T's cancer came back I sort of had a meltdown. (T tells me she will be fine but it still knocked me off balance.)

The good news is that I got up the guts to ask P-doc for muscle relaxers and she gave me Flexeril.

PS I asked p-doc, if T dies would ahe be my new T and she said yes.

I am still a mess. I am falling apart at the seams and now my blood results are all messed up and that might mean more TOXIC meds.

Everything seems to be going wrong all at once.

((((((((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))))))))) I am so sorry that things are so bad right now. And the thought of losing your t is such a hard thing.

Please take the meds you need. I know I don't lke them either but you need to take what you need to.

PM me if you want to. Take care.

((((((((((((Petunia)))))))))))))))))

I love you dear friend!

Sweet and gentle hugs to you my friend.... Braced means that you are putting up guard... so that next phone call will not give you pain. It is your boundery line... not to let anything come to close.. a protection from all that is on the outside not to hurt the inside...
((((((((((Petunia))))))))))
Always....