Dead end...

When i was a kid,i got bullied.That cause a psychological trauma.Now,i'm 14 to 15 years old.I can't go on in my life cause i am in caution all the time.I feel rock solid and i'm choking,i can't exercise for the last two weeks because my heartbeat has gone up to 255 beats per minute from the 180 that i had,I can't concentrate on my work,i can't seem to learn anything,i suffer from depression too,i had APD for some years,a blank mind all the timeno spirit and will, i'm ready to fall down all the time because i can't sleep at night,i tend to have flashes and thoughts of my childhood all the time,things that were childish fears but i have them too now because i can't relax and think and finally everyone i know is against me because they think i'm crazy and that i'm an *****.What i have and what should i do?Sorry for this but i'm in a situation that i think that i'm such a burden to others and i don't have a purpose in life.Please,i need to do something NOW.Someone post a good answer,please,i'm losing myself here...

((((((((((( Rebel in need )))))))))))))

Is there someone you can talk to about this, a school counsellor, doctor, teacher?

Sounds like you could do with some professional help with this.

I'm sorry to hear how stressed you are Rebel. Try to take deep breaths and relax. Keep posting here, too. It helps to talk it through.

We can't tell you "what you have" as we are not professionals, but we can listen and offer support.

I suggest you talk to your parents or a trusted adult who can get you some professional assistance to work through this.

Ask your parents to make an appointment with the psychiatrist who diagnosed you with APD. (Antisocial or Avoidant?)That should be a good starting point.

Keep us posted and good luck

Petunia

Good morning rebel (evening). Thanks for posting; sorry it's not going any better for you. In this topic, there may be others who understand what you describe. Check back in and see, and keep posting, alright? I'll be thinking about you and hoping you're making it. . . .and get some help very soon. I'll check this topic (Dead End) for your posts -

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Petunia said:
Try to take deep breaths and relax. Keep posting here, too. It helps to talk it through.

We can't tell you "what you have" as we are not professionals, but we can listen and offer support

Keep us posted and good luck

Petunia

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Petunia is right. Slowing your breathing down may help with your heart rate. ((((((((((((((((rebel)))))))))))))))))

Hello Rebel,

I am sorry that things are so bad for you. This is only a support site, and there is very little that we can do to help you, since we are far away and don't even know your name or location. It sounds like you really do need help in real life. Tell us any ideas you have of somebody you could talk to. Do you know a teacher, counselor, or other adult that you would be able to trust? How about your parents? There must be someone who cares about you and would like to help. I wish that we could do more here, but the best we can do is help you find someone IRL who can help.

If you can't go to someone you know, you can go to a hospital emergency room and tell them about your symptoms (or go to the school nurse and get a referral), or call a crisis line. They can refer you to someone who is qualified to help you too. Here are some numbers:

TOLL FREE

INTERNATIONAL

"Just Say No" International - Drug &amp; Alcohol Help 800-258-2766 (24 hrs)
Other Listings by Country (TeenAdvice Online) Click Here - scroll to bottom of page for numbers
Crisis Centers Near You (Web Listings) Click Here - to find listings in your area

CANADA

Kid's Help Phone 1-800-668-6868 (24 hrs)
AIDS/Sexually Transmitted Diseases Info 1-800-772-2437
End Abuse - Domestic Assault Line 1-800-END-ABUSE (24 hrs)
Zenith Child Abuse Reporting &amp; Help Dial the Operator and ask for "Zenith 1234" (24 hrs)

USA

Eating Disorders Help Line 1-800-382-2832 (24 hrs)
Domestic Abuse/Assault 1-800-333-SAFE (24 hrs)
Teen AIDS Line 800-234-TEEN (Mon-Fri) 800-440-TEEN (weekends)
National AIDS Line 1- 800-342-AIDS
National Teen Gay &amp; Lesbian Hotline 1-800-347-TEEN (Thurs.-Sun., 7 pm-11:45 pm ET)
Family/Children's Mental Health Hot Line 1-800-654-1247 (24 hrs)
National STD Hotline 800-227-8922 (24 hrs)
Child help USA - Child Abuse Reporting 1-800/4-A-CHILD (24 hrs)
Family Violence Help Line 1-800/222-2000 (24 hrs)
National Runaway Hot Line 1-800-HIT-HOME (24 hrs)
Runaway Help Line 1-800-621-4000 (24 hrs)
Covenant House Crisis Support 1-800-999-9999 (24 hrs)
Suicide Help Line 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433)
Youth Crisis Line 1-800-448-4663
RAINN - Rape Support Line 1-800-656-HOPE
Pregnancy Support and Advice 1-888-4-OPTIONS
General Crisis Counselling 1-800-785-8111

http://teenadvice.about.com/library/.../aa070500a.htm

First of all i want to all.I'd like to say that even this time i posted this i'm having real trouble.I have to do and i can't focus.I'm very stressed up and i feel weird again.Deep breaths calm me a bit.

I thought of getting immediate help next week since i'm feeling more depressed and anxious every day.That is really killing me.It's like seeing something you want and when you go get it,there is something that stops you and you can't go on.I have only one problem to go to a doctor:my mother,who suffers from depression(i think so),but hasn't gone to a doctor to see if she really has.I told her to go to a psychologist but she laughed and said :''We'll see".She doesn't believe that i might have something.My father has many things in his head and i don't want to trouble him more.I'll see what i will do with my mother.

PS:Rapunzel,do you know any telephones for Greece?Just asking.

On google, I found the Aghia Sophia Childrens Hospital in Athens has a mental health hotline and crisis hotline. Can you get their telephone number? The next thing I would recommend is calling your local hospital for a mental health or teen crisis number. They will be able to give you some numbers that you can call at any hour, day or night.

If you are having distressing symptoms, it might be best to just GO to the hospital, if your mom will take you.

The website that I got those crisis numbers from had a link for more international numbers, but just now when I tried them, the links didn't work. You would probably have better luck searching in Greek. I searched for "teen hotlines" and also "teen crisis lines." Try the Greek equivalent terms, and see what you get.

Or you can always go to a hospital and tell them you need help. Or maybe there is someone at your school you could talk to. Don't wait too long if you need help now. You still sound stressed, but you sound better than you did. I do hope that you will be around for a while so that we can get to know you. And be sure to let us know when you find help. We'll still be here for you as extra support.

Rap

If you have post traumatic stress, you really do need to get expert help. In the meantime, trying using the cognitive distortion list (at the top of psychotherapy forum) to review your speech and thoughts. Often we add to our stress by not thinking rationally.

Of course you're not expected to know what to do and how to do it at your tender age. Don't beat yourself up over how you are feeling...try to allow it to be "ok" for now... and some of the stressing will reduce, imo.

One of the best self talk things is to tell yourself "It isn't happening now." That goes for the bullying... it helps you to ground yourself (another good sticky post at the top of this forum)... realize that you are really quite safe right at this moment, right? You're sitting/standing and reading a post at PC...

You can get through this... give yourself time, ok? TC

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE

Sky,i have been ignoring this for many years.Next year i will be fifteen and as a man i want to finally face it.I was telling this to myself this since i was ten.Now we are friends with these persons that bullied me,but sometimes i have <<illusions>>,that send me back at that age and with the same feelings that i felt back then.That goes for the bullying.I know it has passed and isn't coming back but is causing me terrible anxiety,depression and fear for what happened back then,at my ten to twelve.I know it's all inside my head,but they can't go away,my memories are chasing me merciless.But i keep giving myself time.And i know that i will get through this,because a glimpse of hope awakened inside me.Yesterday,i snapped out of my fears for a day and managed to have a nice day with my friends and schoolmates,because we went to a school trip.I felt very happy that i managed to find myself and settle things up.I'm very happy that i'm beating this alone and i'm going to close an appointment next week,i will,and i will let you know how i will have done.And right now i'm listening to a new music cd and i'm very calm,lost inside the music.I'm feeling great...

I agree that ignoring it only works for a short time. PTSD just doesn't heal itself. While the cognitive focus (keeping away from using the distortive thinking) helps to feel better in the present, it really doesn't heal the past and the pstd response. PTSD is a medical condition, that's why you can't get it out of your head... it changes us.

Glad you found something to help calm...yes I use many things. I'm not sure what you mean by you're going to "close' an appt next week... if that means cancel, please don't. True PTSD needs expert help to work with/through.

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE

No,that means that i will go to a doctor.

(((Hugs)))

Believe in Him or not --- GOD LOVES YOU!

Want to share your Christian faith? Click HERE

Rebel, I hope that things begin to look up for you. Imho, your father may be able to help, even if he is busy. He just may be waiting for you to talk with him.

I will keep "pulling" for you.

lemmkins