[tin58]

Ive been seeing a thrrapist for over a year and my official dx is ptsd. I come from alcohlic family and the trauma is more a complex trauma and not a single event. In the past I never would have said I experienced flash backs. But then I had one today and I was aware of it.

Today my aunt started talking about a family vacation from years ago. While she was talking I noticed my vision drop to like the floor. I was zoned out and it was like i was experiencing a vision of the past. I could tell my aunt was talking but i couldnt hear her. I had this flood of anxiety. Then I suddenly realized I was zoning out and i snapped out of it and then I was afraid my aunt noticed I was doing something odd. (IE staring out into space blankly)

But it got me thinking and I think I go through this all the time and I had no idea. I mean in the past i would have just called them "bad memories". oddly enough i have never thought about what they are about or what triggers them lol. And ive not talked to the therapist about many of the specific memories. I feel like this is a good thing so now I'm going to keep track of what they are about and what triggers them. They are extremely stressful.

I've also noticed that when some thing happens and I feel embrassed or bad about myself or if feel I've done something wrong I will get slammed with this confused and dazed feeling. I'm wondering if it's some sort of emotional flash back or reflex. I don't have any particular memories that go with it just the feeling of being dazed and confused. sometimes so much so I won't be able to speak clearly or understand people talking to me. Any thoughts on that? Could that be a flashback too?

[tin58]

Ps. Another good way to explain my last bit about feeling bad about myself is that I feel like I go into this mental fog. I frequently call it just that 'brain fog'

[healingme4me]

Have you tried EMDR?