[rep97]

So after reading a post here by motownjohnny about brainspotting that it works wonders and everyone should try it. I did.

I booked a session(not cheap either... $180) with a brainspotting therapist. I went there and it started with music. She put on a little music on her iphone and she took out her pointer. I followed the pointer and then she held it there and I kept listening to the music. This went on for a little while. I noticed nothing different. All the while she kept asking me how would I rate my shame on a scale 1-10. It was constantly 8 which goes to 10 and up during flashbacks.

Then she told me to close my eyes and go to happy place and safe place that no one knows and nothing bad ever happens. This all to be honest sounded like a bunch of hippy stuff. Especially the going to safe place and everything... nothing worked.

At the end I told her to be honest I thought she would move the pointer in front of my eye and I would talk about trauma. And she said lets try that but don't talk about your trauma if you don't want to. What nonsense. All I want to talk about is my trauma and yet here she is discouraging me from talking about the trauma. What kinda nonsense is this really!!

I totally felt discouraged and didn't talk about my trauma and the session ended there.

I am totally despondent and hopeless now and think nothing will ever cure me of my complex ptsd and boredom and shame and flashbacks. This is painful beyond description.

So does anyone know if this is how brainspotting works or have any idea what next should I do or not.... this has left me hopeless beyond words and I think I may be stuck with this boredom and flashbacks for the rest of my life to which there is no hope from and only suicide seems to be the answer.

[CANDC]

Hi rep97. It does not sound you found brainspotting particularly appropriate to your situation. That price is expensive if insurance will not pay part of it.

Here are articles and various opinions about how brainspotting worked for various people.
Psych Central - Search results for Brainspotting

If you want to talk about trauma, try the Emotional Support room or the PTSD chat (Saturday 8PM EST)