[Morsatra]

Hi everyone, I'm new here.

I created this thread to talk about memories that bother me.

I always think and remember about things that happened in the past and I can't just stop thinking about it. I always get nervous, angry and sad and I cry when I remember these things.

They are things like: my father rejecting me (child), my mom screaming (saying bad things) at me when I was a child, things that my ex-boyfriend and actual boyfriend used to do/say (like talk to other girls, having so much fun with them) and these stuff.

Any memory bother me and I avoid doing things that reminds me of these people. Even drawing something or listening to some music.

I hope I can get over it.

[kaliope]

it is difficult with ptsd to get beyond the traumatic memories, they rob us of our lives and keep us from having lives. but if we can start building new memories, shaping new lives, start looking forward instead of living in the past, we can begin to see joy instead of sorrow.

[LifeGetsBetter]

I have intrusive bad memories too. Almost anything will trigger them, and they are totally out of my control. Sometimes they can ruin my day bringing up wreckage of my past. I'd like to know if anyone has had luck dealing with this in therapy.

[Quarter life]

Looking back is certainly a time thief. I spent 25+ years lost through terror, grief and perpetually asking the question ‘Why Me?’ Blindly handing myself over to professionals and family members to ‘Fix’ me.

So many of us have done this, chased elusive answers to impossible questions. Finally conceding that there are no answers to why, has been the turning point to changing how I choose to live the remainder of my life. The simple fact is that mental illness bought on by trauma, genetics or environment is a lottery…..bad things happen to good people all the time.

For all those lost years I got so caught up in deciphering my feelings and fears, that I forgot to live my life. I believe that this had a great deal to do with my learning to compartmentalise, as opposed to ruminating and churning my grief and loss in my mind for years on end. Not an easy task ...at least it wasn't for me. A dreadfully steep learning curve, with many bumps along the way.

But I have now managed to put my trauma and grief into a pretty little box where it can't hurt me anymore. I know it's there, I know that it is a puzzle that I cant possibly solve and that I can open it anytime, but I resist the urge now as there are millions of other opportunities in life for me to explore. I no longer need my feelings validated or medicated, I no longer need to know why or allocate blame.....I choose life.

Be kind to yourself Morsatra, and welcome to Pc...Were a pretty good bunch here

[Morsatra]

Originally Posted by kaliope

it is difficult with ptsd to get beyond the traumatic memories, they rob us of our lives and keep us from having lives. but if we can start building new memories, shaping new lives, start looking forward instead of living in the past, we can begin to see joy instead of sorrow.

I appreciate your answer and I thank you. I really try not to think about those bad things but it bothers me every day. I`m still trying to think about good things. thanks x

[Morsatra]

Originally Posted by LifeGetsBetter

I have intrusive bad memories too. Almost anything will trigger them, and they are totally out of my control. Sometimes they can ruin my day bringing up wreckage of my past. I'd like to know if anyone has had luck dealing with this in therapy.

yes, that`s how I feel. I remember of a simple thing and it ruins my day. It`s really had not to think about the past. I`m trying to help myself with good thoughts.
thanks for your answer.

[Morsatra]

Originally Posted by Quarter life

Looking back is certainly a time thief. I spent 25+ years lost through terror, grief and perpetually asking the question ‘Why Me?’ Blindly handing myself over to professionals and family members to ‘Fix’ me.

So many of us have done this, chased elusive answers to impossible questions. Finally conceding that there are no answers to why, has been the turning point to changing how I choose to live the remainder of my life. The simple fact is that mental illness bought on by trauma, genetics or environment is a lottery…..bad things happen to good people all the time.

For all those lost years I got so caught up in deciphering my feelings and fears, that I forgot to live my life. I believe that this had a great deal to do with my learning to compartmentalise, as opposed to ruminating and churning my grief and loss in my mind for years on end. Not an easy task ...at least it wasn't for me. A dreadfully steep learning curve, with many bumps along the way.

But I have now managed to put my trauma and grief into a pretty little box where it can't hurt me anymore. I know it's there, I know that it is a puzzle that I cant possibly solve and that I can open it anytime, but I resist the urge now as there are millions of other opportunities in life for me to explore. I no longer need my feelings validated or medicated, I no longer need to know why or allocate blame.....I choose life.

Be kind to yourself Morsatra, and welcome to Pc...Were a pretty good bunch here

wow that's such a story. I'm not going to psychologists or something like that, but I think I should go. I'm trying to help myself each day, but it isn't too simple. Today is a bad day that I'm bringing back those bad memories, and it isn't good. I'll keep trying to help myself during the days.

Thanks for your time