what about if one gets triggered but doesn't even know they've been triggered but they know they feel angry or afraid or somethningn but they dont connect it to themselves as such so how does one get to learn about triggeres

[InACorner]

i feel like that all the time....i am pretty much on my own ......sooooo its hard for me to understand anything at all...in fact i didnt even know what a trigger meant until i came here...and then it all made sense....what i tend to do is when i first start to trigger i feel like im hanging on the edge of cliff....sometimes i can keep myself from falling and getting full blown into it....or i can sorta veer off alittle....while i have this on the edge of cliff feeling i try really fast to think of what happened(because it doesnt give me much time to do much thinking lol) like go figure..one of my triggers is chores...not really chores..but more if people are dictating chores to me....or looking at me expecting me to know what im supposed to do...kinda thing...when it first started ...i started getting that on the edge of a cliff feeling.....now i just try to stay away from those situations by never letting the house get dirty where the head of the house hold starts dictating to us what she demands to have done...or starts staring at us like we are supposed to get up and know what to do.....i must be babbling on ....like a fool....but just talking about the above mentioned subject is starting to make me....um yea....id better go...hope i helped you out .....alittle at least....just try to view the scenerio and what happened...and when something comes across you....and you feel sharp intake of breathe then you know....alright ttyl ....love, inny

((( _mouse )))

It takes time, at least for me it did.

When you're feeling angry or afraid etc, it's hard to stop and think about the why's and what's and the core roots.

But at some later time, if you stop and ask yourself, "What did that sound/touch/smell/sight remind me of that caused me to react that way" you should be able to start identifying triggers.

A trigger is not a symptom, it's what activates your symptoms. (heart palpitations, sweats etc)

Like sirens are a major heart-stopper for me. I never really even knew why, until I got into therapy and connected it, but now I am able to say, "Ok, it's not happening now. No one you know is hurt or dying. You don't have to save anyone and your heart is racing but you know why."

If you can stop and rethink what you were doing at the time and what might have prompted you to react, you can begin to identify what triggers you.

Then you can begin to be aware and avoid (yes, sometimes avoidance is good) such things or at least have grounding techniques in store.

Doesn't always work but it's a start.

Hope that made sense.

thanks!

I seem to resist asking myself what is this reminding me off, because part of me resists really wanting to know, to have to re experience the original wound. I feel like I;m in a straight jacket and fighting to get out of it as fast as I can.

[InACorner]

i know how you feel...i resist too...alot in fact....i feel exactly the same.....and the sad part...no body either believes me or they dont think i can actually feel this way from something they think seems so .....innocent.....nobody understands....and nobody will undo the straightjacket...sorry to be so depressing..but sitting in the semi dark with a packet of dry hot chocolate mix is not...exactly upbeat at the moment

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Petunia said:
((( _mouse )))

It takes time, at least for me it did.

When you're feeling angry or afraid etc, it's hard to stop and think about the why's and what's and the core roots.

But at some later time, if you stop and ask yourself, "What did that sound/touch/smell/sight remind me of that caused me to react that way" you should be able to start identifying triggers.

A trigger is not a symptom, it's what activates your symptoms. (heart palpitations, sweats etc)

Like sirens are a major heart-stopper for me. I never really even knew why, until I got into therapy and connected it, but now I am able to say, "Ok, it's not happening now. No one you know is hurt or dying. You don't have to save anyone and your heart is racing but you know why."

If you can stop and rethink what you were doing at the time and what might have prompted you to react, you can begin to identify what triggers you.

Then you can begin to be aware and avoid (yes, sometimes avoidance is good) such things or at least have grounding techniques in store.

Doesn't always work but it's a start.

Hope that made sense.

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It made perfect sense to me Petunia, as the fire whistle makes my world stand still. I wait to see if the ambulance is coming here, knowing its not. Then I think can I help. well no..........Then I think ......about when I was hit by a car when I was 4 and I have to stop and tell myself its ok!
SOmetimes I have to just sit still and wait for it to stop. SIlly isn't it?

[Perna]

I pay attention to the secondary stuff. When I get road rage, I imediately stop and look to see what's making me anxious, what I feel "powerless" about. I don't get road rage "normally" so I'm keyed to see that particular "different" behavior in me. Sometimes it takes awhile but, over time, I can now sometimes get it with just a single thought instead of a really really obnoxious action (cutting someone off, "racing" against someone, not letting someone merge or trying to get in front of them to get off the highway before they can go by, etc.).

But extreme anger with action is usually not my way of being so when I called a grocery store manager, for example, and cussed him out and then was thinking about it and realized there wasn't a whole lot he could have done to prevent the problem and some of the problem was my fault and my whole reaction was "extreme" for the degree of the problem, etc. I then get interested in seeing what's "really" going on, what happened somewhere else usually, to set me off.

But I think that's one of the things emotions are "for" is to clue us in? Out-of-place emotions or those stronger than usual serve me as flags that there's something going on somewhere else I need to attend to.