[Rpierfelice]

It was 5 years ago, I was 28 years old. My fiancé and I attended her girlfriend's Halloween party up north at a cabin during the winter. The cabin was VERY secluded and no telephone signal was available. The cabin belonged to her friend's boyfriend (now husband unfortunately). Her boyfriends name is Vito. His buddies and a few of his bone head druggie friends were there too, real losers but I did not know until what extent until this experience. During the night everybody was dressed up in costume partying away. It was actually quite fun until they started doing Marijuana and cocaine! Mixing drugs with a lot of alcohol. My wife and I weren't those kind of people but we just ignored it and had fun regardless. The next morning, Vito had a fight with my wife's friend (his girlfriend). What happens next was terrifying and drugs and alcohol could have had something to do with it. He started trashing the cabin violently destroying everything in his path screaming crazily. No calming would work, he was breathing rapidly and his eyes seemed different; like he wasn't in control. He destroyed everything from plates to cabinets. We were all there with him trying to calm him down. He was in complete rage screaming at his girlfriend until she finally said "it's over". He then went outside and started destroying whatever he could find. We followed him out to try and calm him again. His idiot friends give him a joint to smoke to calm him down, no success. I wanted to leave but my wife said no she wanted to be there for her friend. Vito repeatedly asked her if it's really over, and she said yes over and over. He went inside and came back out with a kitchen knife and threatened to stab himself if she left him because he said that's how much he loves her. She still said no and he then stabbed himself on the top of the thigh with the knife. My wife and I were scared at this point. His friends were just laughing. Vito's girlfriend went in her room on the second floor of the cabin and Vito followed her there with the knife and locked the door. Yelling from both of them followed and he wouldn't let her leave the room. He kept yelling rim inside "she's not going anywhere!". His friends wouldn't let me make an 911 call - the only call I had a signal to make. I wanted to leave and go get help but my wif refused to leave her friend, and I wasn't going to leave my wife by herself while I went. This whole event lasted about 6 hours straight until Vito's girlfriend texted my wife that it's ok and that we can go home. I grabbed my wife and we left. I was shaking for about 4-5 hours afterwards. Ever since then I freeze and get uncontrollably nervous if someone gets angry or upset. I work in security and this is affecting my job performance. I have noticed that I have gotten more bitter and have developed a grim attitude. I avoid confrontations now and have anxiety. Don't know how to just accept that this happened and move on emotionally and psychologically. I am on edge and lot and my confidence is low. I don't know if this is Post Tramautic Stress or not. I just know I am distressed and can't enjoy life anymore and I believe it's because of this event. Don't know how to move on,thinking that this is permanent and tattooed into me

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[Out There]

If you are distressed and not enjoying life anymore something is amiss. Can you seek therapy? I understand the feeling this is permanent and encourage you to reach out.

[Open Eyes]

Hi Rpierfelice, welcome to PC and the PTSD forum. Well, none of us can diagnose you here, but I can say that what you experienced could have been enough to result with post traumatic stress. PTS can happen with anyone who experiences a traumatic event where they either feel their life is endanger or the life of someone else.

I think it is good that you are talking about it, explaining how it has affected you and that you are concerned about this challenge. You may not have PTSD, however, you may be sensitive to anything that might remind you of that event that clearly frightened and deeply disturbed you and you felt you had no control over it.

It could have been the drugs that contributed to this individual's behavior, he may have been experiencing a psychotic episode. It's not good to mix drugs like that because it can throw off the chemicals in the brain that can produce some troubling behaviors. Even marijuana can be a batch that contains high levels of THC that can have a really bad affect on the brain too. Some people get involved with drugs and that can lead to them becoming unpredictable so it's better to stay away from people that are involved with drug using. There are people who already have problems that use drugs to escape and it sounds like this individual is already unstable and should be getting help.

I had to move away from a group of people that were into drugs and my husband was a binge alcoholic and I hated when he was around this group of friends because they always talked him into getting wasted. My husband has been sober for 25 years now and we stay away from individuals that get involved with drugs. Your wife may need to distance from this friend because it sounds like this friend may be codependent if she is still with this unpredictable individual. Unless he gets help with this challenge he can remain "a risk" for her.

I think you should seek out a therapist, preferably a therapist that works with individuals who have been traumatized so you can talk more about this, how it has affected you and slowly get the support you need to work through it so you don't struggle alone with it.

(((Welcoming Supportive Hugs))))
OE

[Rpierfelice]

Thank you it's good to talk to someone even if it is on the Internet. I WILL try and seek therapy because I have tried burying these emotions but it doesn't work.

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