[leomama]

Hello everyone,
It was just brought to my attention that PTSD is hard on other people. I have it, my partner has it, and I have been told by a support person my daughter has it although she has not been dx yet, so its my norm. However I have take for granted it is not other's norm. Has anyone else had this experience of coming to and realizing PTSD is not the norm for the rest of society and adjusted their behavior and attitude accordingly?

[Trace14]

Originally Posted by leomama

Hello everyone,
It was just brought to my attention that PTSD is hard on other people. I have it, my partner has it, and I have been told by a support person my daughter has it although she has not been dx yet, so its my norm. However I have take for granted it is not other's norm. Has anyone else had this experience of coming to and realizing PTSD is not the norm for the rest of society and adjusted their behavior and attitude accordingly?

Never really thought about that. But being in such a numb , neutral state of mind I have noticed more people with issues, (Anxiety and BP) that I had never noticed before. Maybe I am just more educated now on these subjects and that's why I notice them. Who knows?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by Trace14

Never really thought about that. But being in such a numb , neutral state of mind I have noticed more people with issues, (Anxiety and BP) that I had never noticed before. Maybe I am just more educated now on these subjects and that's why I notice them. Who knows?

I meant that PTSD is hard on people with anxiety and BP although ironically people with undiagnosed anxiety and bp can cause PTSD in others. We're all connected.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[snarkydaddy]

Originally Posted by leomama

I meant that PTSD is hard on people with anxiety and BP although ironically people with undiagnosed anxiety and bp can cause PTSD in others. We're all connected.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I have been thinking about this...
the effect may not the same from person to person, and perhaps not as dramatic. For example in a close relationship there might be periodic unexplained distancing which would defiantly effect another person. In a romantic relationship not being interested in sex would be a problem. Just being around someone who is always in a state of hyper vigilance would really cause stress on the others, I think in general there may be a tendency to feel hurt, alienated, or discouraged by being around someone with PTSD. I think being exposed on a regular basis to another persons trauma, without taking the proper precautions over a long period of time is going to be injured in some manor.

[leomama]

Wasn't talking about a close relationship, was talking about a group dynamic. I think I may need to try again .

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[snarkydaddy]

In that case. IMO
It is the repetitive verbalization and emotion connected to that verbalization in a group setting with those without PTSD that causes the "strain". It creates a stickiness to that trauma that gets passed on to others and is hard to stay clear of it without the proper training. This causes tension and a leeriness to engage with those with PTSD.

At any rate that is what I have observed in both my behavior and that of others with PTSD and those without. I learned and stopped talking about my issues for this reason. At the time I did not know that I had PTSD, but understood the power of repetitiveness because of career choices and my general confusion about understanding others that forced me to take a hard look at this in my 30's.

[leomama]

Thank you that explains it. I know I've been traumatized by others SA when they've told me without warning me. I have a very difficult family .

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[MtnTime2896]

In a non-close relationship, no one has any idea because I force myself in every way to not show any abnormalities. Yes, they've seen me jump out of my skin but that's shrugged off so easy by everyone that I don't get too caught up in it. I don't live in an area of the state where showing "weakness" is a good idea. If you do, something will always happen. Therefore, only people I trust know about my condition. On top of that, I'm just really private. So, to answer your question, I guess I came to that realization the moment my PTSD symptoms came into my life.

[leomama]

I'm trying to be private while not having secrets. My way of life demands vigorous honesty. Someone used to tell me I don't have to give a deposition. Now I know everything say and write can be brought up again. That makes me feel very unsafe, again going back to my childhood. I have some possibly triggering abuse I may talk about later.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[MtnTime2896]

Originally Posted by leomama

I'm trying to be private while not having secrets. My way of life demands vigorous honesty. Someone used to tell me I don't have to give a deposition. Now I know everything say and write can be brought up again. That makes me feel very unsafe, again going back to my childhood. I have some possibly triggering abuse I may talk about later.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I wish that you didn't have to do something that makes you feel unsafe, but sometimes that's just out of our hands, isn't it. Well, I used to be a support aid for people with cancer, PTSD and/or major depression. When I was doing this, I had to be open for questions that would require honest answers. More than that, to introduce myself I would have to touch on my own experiences to show my understanding of their illness. I acted much like I do on this site. Sure, I talk about it and go as far as I feel comfortable with but don't allow any emotion to surface until later in private. If I begin feeling uncomfortable about something, I usually would let that person know and begin talking about something else that could benefit them. People are remarkably understanding at times. Other times, they want to keep "picking at the scab". That's when I would set a clear boundary and would simply tell them that I will talk about it but only in my own time. I didn't allow myself to feel any more unsafe than I already had to. It can make not only me uncomfortable but it can make the other person as well. I wouldn't talk about a lot because I refused to trigger the other person.
I don't know if any of this actually helps but it's all I can think of at the moment.

[leomama]

It does! That's it! Picking at the scab! There are certain things I do not want to talk about in a public forum. It does not feel safe. I appreciate that analogy! Thank you. I'm trying to heal with as small a scar as possible. I'm also trying not to get injured again.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk