[dancinglady]

I went through 13 years of abuse by mental health professionals. There is no available legal or board actions. I tried for several years.
I also sustained years of abuse as a child.

All I hear is forgive them and move on with your life. Ok so I stated I forgive each and everyone.
I still have horrible flashbacks and memories which brings it all back. I have done EMDR, meditation and mindfulness. I have done hypnotherapy etc. nothing stops above. I have sleep problems because of the things and have been sleep deprived for 10+ years. I have been to sleep disorder clinics.

I am asking “step by step guide” on how to forgive people so I can at the age of 70 have a peaceful life? Any help is greatly appreciated.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I went through 13 years of abuse by mental health professionals. There is no available legal or board actions. I tried for several years.
I also sustained years of abuse as a child.

All I hear is forgive them and move on with your life. Ok so I stated I forgive each and everyone.
I still have horrible flashbacks and memories which brings it all back. I have done EMDR, meditation and mindfulness. I have done hypnotherapy etc. nothing stops above. I have sleep problems because of the things and have been sleep deprived for 10+ years. I have been to sleep disorder clinics.

I am asking “step by step guide” on how to forgive people so I can at the age of 70 have a peaceful life? Any help is greatly appreciated.

I believe you. I been mentally abuse by a therapist and mental and physical abuse by my mom. Lisa A Romano had great self help video and meditation, Lauren Fenton has great self help video and meditation. Sometime they have live chat and does therapy.

[*Beth*]

I'm so sorry you've been through such a trauma. You may find others who have had experiences similar to yours on the psychotherapy board.

[pachyderm]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I am asking “step by step guide” on how to forgive people so I can at the age of 70 have a peaceful life?.

It is not obvious to me that forgiving people is a requirement.

[Fuzzybear]

[Open Eyes]

The person you need to forgive is yourself for not being able to better protect yourself. Bottom line is you did not know enough at the time and it contributed to your suffering and suffering a loss. Part of that loss is “trust” and that is a big deal.

Unfortunately there was not as much understood when you reached out and that came out in the therapy you received. Ptsd was not as understood as is is now and given your age and generation the help you needed was lacking.

IMHO a person doesn’t just get over ptsd. Instead the person has to work very hard at learning how to manage it. It’s a very personal challenge depending on what kinds of traumas have been experienced.

[SprinkL3]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

I went through 13 years of abuse by mental health professionals. There is no available legal or board actions. I tried for several years.
I also sustained years of abuse as a child.

All I hear is forgive them and move on with your life. Ok so I stated I forgive each and everyone.
I still have horrible flashbacks and memories which brings it all back. I have done EMDR, meditation and mindfulness. I have done hypnotherapy etc. nothing stops above. I have sleep problems because of the things and have been sleep deprived for 10+ years. I have been to sleep disorder clinics.

I am asking “step by step guide” on how to forgive people so I can at the age of 70 have a peaceful life? Any help is greatly appreciated.

When I first started out in therapy with my current T about two years ago, I told her about my past history of bad therapies, one of which was an abusive one. We spent the better part of our first few months discussing why I struggled to trust therapists and the entire field of psychology, for that matter. It was painful discussing what was going on because I didn't know if my therapist was going to blow me off like the others always did. But this one didn't. She acknowledged my pain, validated my traumatic memories, and reemphasized how brave I was to revisit therapy, even after all that. My therapist continues to feel honored working with me, and she allows me to ask her questions when I'm feeling unsure or insecure. She reassures me all the time. I've not had a therapist like her ever before. And I wasn't really looking; she just happened to be at the right place at the right time to treat me. It only took like two decades of me struggling from therapist to therapist and feeling hurt along the way.

Hopefully you'll find the right therapist to help you heal, and to validate your pain.

I'm so sorry you have struggled with all of this trauma from therapy abuse.

[RoxanneToto]

I disagree you need to forgive anyone else in order to heal - I’m not saying you can’t if you want to, but I’ve found letting myself be angry, then dealing with that anger in a cathartic way, has been more helpful for me than forgiving my abusers, mostly because said people got pleasure from hurting others and had no desire to change.
I’m not giving into the “be nice, because being rightfully angry makes the perps uncomfortable” social conditioning.