[inside]

sleep at night
dont think about what happned when you are able to nod off
how not to be so frightened

It takes some practice.

You might find this helpful. It works for me sometimes. My safe place is a favorite beach of mine that I "made" into a fortress.

"Safe Place" Visualization for Containment and Grounding

Like other techniques for containment and grounding, "safe scene" visualization enables an individual to nurture and soothe him or herself and to practice effective control over their feelings and thoughts.

"Safe scene" work utilizes an individual's natural talent for dissociation. When doing "safe scene" work and individual chooses to experience internal stimuli which is safe, soothing and nurturing over internal stimuli which is unsafe, traumatic and re-victimizing. With practice an individual can soothe him or herself at will and exercise control over the spontaneous dissociation and flashbacks that survivors of trauma often experience.

To create an effective safe scene, it is important to incorporate all of the senses. The more senses involved, the more functional the scene will be.

Examples include:
Visual
seeing colors, distances, details, features of the safe place.

Hearing
soothing sounds with varying volumes.

Smell
a variety of pleasant scents.

Touch
a variety of safe and pleasant textures.

Kinesthetic
standing, walking, sitting, lying down.

Focusing inwards and internally visualizing a safe scene can help an individual to quickly relax. There are no limits to the creativity or imagination an individual may employ in the safe scene work. A safe place can be an actual place, an imaginary place, or a combination of the two. Safe scenes can be inside or outside, on this planet or another, and include beaches, islands, meadows, forests, or any other setting that an individual would find safe and soothing.

Safe scenes include items within which can contribute to an even greater feeling of safety and security, such as walls, moats, containment images, and safe animals. It is best to not include other real people in an individual's safe scene image because the security and soothing derived from the safe scene should not be dependent on others and should not reinforce a dependency for safety and soothing on others. Rather, safe scene work reinforces an individual's ability to take responsibility for their own soothing.

Once an individual has developed a safe scene, there are many things he or she can do to reinforce their safe scene and increase its effectiveness. The first step in this process is to write out a detailed description of the safe place, including the experience of all of the senses in the safe place as described earlier. This should then be shared and processed with others (i.e., therapist, or group therapy) in order to receive feedback, comments and suggestions. Then it is often helpful to make a picture which represents in some way the safe place. This, of course, is not to be an artist's rendering of the safe scene, but rather a representation of it through colors, images, etc. Most importantly, the safe scene should be practiced at least three times daily, when a person is in a calm and relaxed state. Safe scenes increase in their effectiveness the more they are practiced.

[MINIME]

I have heard on the news recently that being surrounded by good smells while u sleep promotes good dreams. Not sure if it works. I tried this new Tide detergent and it smells like lilacs and it smells so good and when I wash my sheets in it I feel cozier. I also try to be careful of what i watch and read or think about before bed. I struggle with this also.

[lifeblows]

That is an excellent question. I'd like to figure out how to sleep myself. I have had nightmares ever since I was little, but for the past five years they have been so frequent, bad, and intense that I try to avoid sleep because of them. I wake up literally screaming from them or choking on my own tears. I am so anxiety-filled that even sleep is stressful. What the hell?!?

I'm beginning to think it's too much to ask to be able to sleep without nightmares (among other things I need in my life). I can't make them go away or stop. Whenever I feel like dying, which is pretty much every day, that is one of the many reasons why. It's like I can't escape from my problems day or night, asleep or awake. I hate nightmares, they're horrible. Why won't they go away?