[sherry13]

Now that i know i suffer from ptsd i am left with the why me question..Not so much the pity why me..But the why did the abuser chose me?? Why was i so easy to be controlled and manipulated?? N ow im left with this question so he still controls me...Questions of why and when..if i dont get better im still being controlled by my abuser....When does this go away??When do i find these answers?? i know this all takes time...i'm sorry if i sound like im rambling...I just want my life back...i wanna look in the mirror and see some part of myself looking back.....I want control of my own life..

[nothemama8]

Sherry, go to a Womens Self Defense Class, it will help you feel better also you won't be afraid of not being able to protect yourself, it works wonders
You are not to blame , do not stay a victim, you have begun to get control by coming here and venting
Angie

[ktp]

Angie's right. I agree, self defense sounds like a great idea, as well.

Many blessings,
Kimberly.

[jennie]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Now that i know i suffer from ptsd i am left with the why me question..Not so much the pity why me..But the why did the abuser chose me?? Why was i so easy to be controlled and manipulated?? Now im left with this question so he still controls me...Questions of why and when..if i dont get better im still being controlled by my abuser....When does this go away??When do i find these answers?? i know this all takes time...i'm sorry if i sound like im rambling...I just want my life back...i wanna look in the mirror and see some part of myself looking back.....I want control of my own life..

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

The fact that you are asking these questions AND trying to work on your issues is proof he [abuser] does not control you any more.

Some individuals are more susceptible to abuse, such as children, mentally challenged individuals, people under the influence of drugs/alcohol, and persons who have been victims of abuse in their past. Many people who are "people pleasers," who put others' needs before their own needs, also are at risk for being hurt from abusers.

For me, one of the most difficult things to really believe in my heart is that the abuse that happened to me was not my fault.

It was not your fault. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that. Try to believe it.