[Altered Moment]

I would like to report a successful med story. Tentative though because it has only been two months on the new meds.

I was on Effexor and Abilify for at least a year. Were not working at all. I was in one of my much longer term now fairly deep depressions. I have very refractory or treatment resistant depression. To meds and therapy. I have cycled in and out for many years. Some meds have worked better than others some not at all. I have been on almost everyone and every combination and it has never stopped the cycles. Over all I think they have helped or I would have given up on them along time ago. When in a very deep depression I don't ever remember meds pulling me out. Maybe they have at times. Usually it just has to run its course and I snap out of it.

Two months ago I ditched abilify cold turkey and went on lamictal. The plan was to also ditch the Effexor and switch to Fetzima but we wanted to wait a month to see how the Lamictal did. With the Lamictal I noticed a big improvement in mood after about two weeks. Still had all the other symptoms, no motivation, no energy, no showering, won't leave the house. We know the drill. Same after a month on Lamictal, just better mood over all.

So we ditched the Effexor and went on Fetzima. After two weeks I started noticing a huge difference. It was getting me kind of manic sometimes and I would be very calm at other times. It has been a month on it and this last week I have felt wired a lot. I have gotten very weepy at times and cry real easy. Over all I have slowly seen a huge improvement in all those symptoms I listed above. I am not totally out of the woods yet but right on the edge.

Now I always get a little manic for awhile when I come out of a depression and I could be that it has just run its course again and I am snapping out of it like usually happens with me and it has nothing to do with meds. But I know that is not the case. I know my body and mind well after all these years and I can totally tell it is the meds. From the side effects which I am having some but nothing real bad and the fact that I am getting real wired and different effects I cannot explain. But I can totally tell it is different from the other times and it is the meds.

I am a little worried it might trigger a manic episode, this Fetzima is very activating (it is the nor epinephrine), but I think it will balance out and I will be back to my normal self again. Thank God. My normal self is mild to moderately depressed but maybe it will even keep that at bay. I fully suspect that next Nov. I will cycle back into one but who knows maybe not.

So I still say tentative. We will see. My hopes are very high based on what I am seeing.

Now I still have this theory that people who are doing very well on meds long term don't come to these boards and tell us about it and we don't hear a lot of success stories. It gets depressing reading the depression section.

I would like those of us on these boards who read this to post in this thread if they have had success stories with meds. Thank you in advance.

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by zinco14532323

I would like to report a successful med story. Tentative though because it has only been two months on the new meds.

I was on Effexor and Abilify for at least a year. Were not working at all. I was in one of my much longer term now fairly deep depressions. I have very refractory or treatment resistant depression. To meds and therapy. I have cycled in and out for many years. Some meds have worked better than others some not at all. I have been on almost everyone and every combination and it has never stopped the cycles. Over all I think they have helped or I would have given up on them along time ago. When in a very deep depression I don't ever remember meds pulling me out. Maybe they have at times. Usually it just has to run its course and I snap out of it.

Two months ago I ditched abilify cold turkey and went on lamictal. The plan was to also ditch the Effexor and switch to Fetzima but we wanted to wait a month to see how the Lamictal did. With the Lamictal I noticed a big improvement in mood after about two weeks. Still had all the other symptoms, no motivation, no energy, no showering, won't leave the house. We know the drill. Same after a month on Lamictal, just better mood over all.

So we ditched the Effexor and went on Fetzima. After two weeks I started noticing a huge difference. It was getting me kind of manic sometimes and I would be very calm at other times. It has been a month on it and this last week I have felt wired a lot. I have gotten very weepy at times and cry real easy. Over all I have slowly seen a huge improvement in all those symptoms I listed above. I am not totally out of the woods yet but right on the edge.

Now I always get a little manic for awhile when I come out of a depression and I could be that it has just run its course again and I am snapping out of it like usually happens with me and it has nothing to do with meds. But I know that is not the case. I know my body and mind well after all these years and I can totally tell it is the meds. From the side effects which I am having some but nothing real bad and the fact that I am getting real wired and different effects I cannot explain. But I can totally tell it is different from the other times and it is the meds.

I am a little worried it might trigger a manic episode, this Fetzima is very activating (it is the nor epinephrine), but I think it will balance out and I will be back to my normal self again. Thank God. My normal self is mild to moderately depressed but maybe it will even keep that at bay. I fully suspect that next Nov. I will cycle back into one but who knows maybe not.

So I still say tentative. We will see. My hopes are very high based on what I am seeing.

Now I still have this theory that people who are doing very well on meds long term don't come to these boards and tell us about it and we don't hear a lot of success stories. It gets depressing reading the depression section.

I would like those of us on these boards who read this to post in this thread if they have had success stories with meds. Thank you in advance.

To many med changes achieve zilt in the end. if you ever reach 70% remission don't change a thing .

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by sewerrats

To many med changes achieve zilt in the end. if you ever reach 70% remission don't change a thing .

Huh??? It is to late for that. And what the hell is 70% remission?

I have had 100% remission for years before prozac was ever invented.

And aren't you switching meds right now? How many med changes have you had total? Sometimes you are contradicting yourself SR.

I have had 4 different AD, in the last 6 years

And this is supposed to be a thread about success stories on meds. Don't you have one? I thought you did with Lexapro besides the side effects you put up with.

My success stories end up in stopping meds or at least that is the goal I know that isn't going to work everybody. The celexa a number of years ago kicked me out. I would come home from work and organize my music the whole weekend... Mostly tagging it and adding information from the web. Very time consuming and now I stream it! I think I was in a bit of hibernation but at least I wasn't sleeping all the time which would have been worse. That's the good part. When I stabilized I should have come off it but I will stop the story right there.

"Now I always get a little manic for awhile when I come out of a depression and I could be that it has just run its course again and I am snapping out of it like usually happens with me and it has nothing to do with meds. But I know that is not the case. I know my body and mind well after all these years and I can totally tell it is the meds. From the side effects which I am having some but nothing real bad and the fact that I am getting real wired and different effects I cannot explain. But I can totally tell it is different from the other times and it is the meds."

This "manic" phase... Is it really hypomania? It could indeed be a natural part of your cycle. I have mentioned the creative energy in my own experience. It is not unusual. Beethoven wrote his arguably best work after coming out of a deep depression. I suspect you could find this behavior in scientists too. Think of it like waking up where the depression was a time of processing. While I know you believe it is the meds it might still be a good time to take advantage of that energy and do something you haven't been able to in a while.

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by zinco14532323

Huh??? It is to late for that. And what the hell is 70% remission?

I have had 100% remission for years before prozac was ever invented.

And aren't you switching meds right now? How many med changes have you had total? Sometimes you are contradicting yourself SR.


And this is supposed to be a thread about success stories on meds. Don't you have one? I thought you did with Lexapro besides the side effects you put up with.

your own words in the thread above, I HAVE BEEN ON EVERY COMBINATIONYou have tried a few med in the last year or so you wrote, remeron, lamicat ,effexor many times, fetzima, abilify That's quite a few meds please read you own post first. you do change to many times looking for the golden egg , there isn't one. no one has had %100 remission not even a Normal there is no 100% you should no that, unless its the right shot of morphine. I have had 4 med changes in 6 years 2 of them in 3 week do to seisure with one. Lexapro my last and I have not given up I have lowered it to 5mg a crap level but my GP has given me 6 mg of lorazapam because I have no addiction issuies and im hoping the extra 2mg will cover me. I am not looking for a long life just a comfortable 1 for maybe another 5 years . I never touching anything to do with a combo and never will.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by sewerrats

your own words in the thread above, I HAVE BEEN ON EVERY COMBINATIONYou have tried a few med in the last year or so you wrote, remeron, lamicat ,effexor many times, fetzima, abilify That's quite a few meds please read you own post first. you do change to many times looking for the golden egg , there isn't one. no one has had %100 remission not even a Normal there is no 100% you should no that, unless its the right shot of morphine. I have had 4 med changes in 6 years 2 of them in 3 week do to seisure with one. Lexapro my last and I have not given up I have lowered it to 5mg a crap level but my GP has given me 6 mg of lorazapam because I have no addiction issuies and im hoping the extra 2mg will cover me. I am not looking for a long life just a comfortable 1 for maybe another 5 years . I never touching anything to do with a combo and never will.

You are right I have changed many times. But I do not think too many times. I am very treatment resistant and meds have never worked so great for me. I will admit that a part of me hopes for a magic bullet. But I know there is no such thing. I have always stayed on a med for at least six months and usually one or two years. The only one I ever stopped right away was wellbutrin. The last three years I was on abilify and effexor or abilify and pristiq. Same thing. I am exaggerating when I say I have been on every one and combination there are so many of them. It has been alot though.

I would just like a med that works as good as they do for a lot of other people, so I can at least get out of bed, out of the house. Maybe I have found the right one or combo. I don't have any doubt I will relapse. I would bet money on it. And it will happen in Nov. If get really lucky and these meds prevent that relapse that would be awesome.

Where do you come up with this if I have a 70% remission rate I might as well give up on meds and just stay on what I am taking??? You are sounding like Michanne and I don't think she will like you sounding like her.

I know there is no magic bullet but I won't give up on meds or changing if I need to. We do combinations here that is just how we do. I ain't skeeered.

I will say it again I had 100% remission rate long long before Prozac was ever invented or ever touched an AD. It is true that in the last five years it has gotten much worse. I have done a pretty thorough inventory in the last month about it and it has mostly been due to situational. Working, getting laid off, working getting laid off, financial situation getting worse and worse. Ever since 2006 is when it started. I was laid off for two years one time. I got unemployment the whole time but that is only half of my normal pay.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by Michanne

This "manic" phase... Is it really hypomania? It could indeed be a natural part of your cycle. I have mentioned the creative energy in my own experience. It is not unusual. Beethoven wrote his arguably best work after coming out of a deep depression. I suspect you could find this behavior in scientists too. Think of it like waking up where the depression was a time of processing. While I know you believe it is the meds it might still be a good time to take advantage of that energy and do something you haven't been able to in a while.

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

It isn't really hypomania. It is more being wired. I have had hypo mania and it is a part of my coming out of it cycle. It is really hard to put into words the difference for me. I have just felt the Fetzima kicking in. It is very activating, I am sure due to the nor epinephrine. I don't feel more creative and I do know what that feels like. I have been able to go through all my paper work and get things some what organized. I have reasons for needing to do that. Today I am going to take a shower and go grocery shopping. No big deal for most. It is huge for me compared to where I have been. The amount of coffee in the morning isn't helping. The addict in me just won't let me switch to decaf. It is weird but when I am severely depressed I never touch coffee...no desire for it.

When I went through that full blown manic episode from the meth withdrawal I was very creative. I would walk outside and look at something and a whole poem would pop into my head. I have never written l line of poetry in my life. I would blow people away with my writings and sayings I would come up with. I wish I still had those notebooks. I was full blown manic and psychotic but I loved it, it was very cool to have whole poems just pop into your head. Good poems too. I get much more creative once I have fully come out of the depression.

I find it very interesting too that so many great American writers were major alcoholics. There is definitely some connection between addiction and mental illness and creativity. Normally I am very left brained and analytical but in the right situation I have access to that right brain creativity.

There are supposed to be exercises that you can do to access that creativity if you are left brained. I have read about it but never did them. I am sure you and I are much more creative at work then we give ourselves credit for, having analytic jobs.

This thread is getting off track from my original intention. Oh well it tends to happen.

[marmaduke]

To many med changes achieve zilt in the end. if you ever reach 70% remission don't change a thing .
I think sewerrats is just trying to say if you keep changing meds looking for perfection, to be 100% happy you will probably fail.
Even most 'normal' people are not 100% happy with everything in their life.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by marmaduke

To many med changes achieve zilt in the end. if you ever reach 70% remission don't change a thing .
I think sewerrats is just trying to say if you keep changing meds looking for perfection, to be 100% happy you will probably fail.
Even most 'normal' people are not 100% happy with everything in their life.

That could be what he is saying and that is true. I know there is no magic bullet and meds are only part of the solution. Believe me I have done all of the other stuff too. Therapy and groups and on and on and everything I could think of. So it is not like I am relying only on meds.

But if my current meds quit working in a year or two should I just stay on them? I won't I will try something else. I am not looking for 100% satisfaction from meds. I have very treatment resistant depression. Resistant to all forms of treatment. I have written about it at length in these forums. I want something that at least partly works.

It seemed to me more like he was saying it based on some theory about remission rates and AD's.

[Altered Moment]

Ever since 2006 is when it started. I was laid off for two years one time. I got unemployment the whole time but that is only half of my normal pay.

Now a lot of people will get pissed about this. How could I collect unemployment for two years and not get another job. You lazy bum you.

In 2006 when the real estate market crashed in CA I decided to join the plumbers unions. It cost me 2000 bucks to join and I had to go to a year of school two nights a week. They still had a lot of work on the books. Big hospitals, schools, processing plant, refineries. Alot of good work with good pay and benefits. I thought I was set. Then the work they had started drying up and the lay offs started. Work six months get laid off, work three months, get laid off. In the union if you go get another job they kick you out. I had invested a lot in the union gig and I wanted to stick with it. And there were no other jobs out there in plumbing. Even my side jobs ran dry. So I sat on my butt for two years and collected unemployment. Half my normal pay. My financial situation was getting worse and worse. This was not at all good for my depression. It kept getting worse and worse. After those two years I got called out to a big prison hospital. It was the only work the union had in two years. Everyone had been laid off. I worked for a year on that job but my depression was getting worse and worse. I finally got fired for missing to much work due to depression. I went into a six month long very deep suicidal depression. Longest and worse I have ever had. So I don't know for sure if my depressions are just getting worse naturally or it is due to all the work and financial issues. Finances are a huge trigger for me. I snapped out of it for four months and then went diving into another long one that I am just now coming out of. The last year and a half no way I could have worked. I did a lot in the four months I was better but you can't hold a job being depressed 8 months out of the year. I am still in good with the union and could go off the disabled list and go back if they have the work. I have heard that most of the guys I worked with on the prison hospital job are laid off again. The construction trades have been hit the worse since the economy crashed in 2006. It has not recovered since except for the oil boom in North Dakota. I am not a pipe fitter I am a plumber so I couldn't really work an oil rig or gas well. I know I could pass the test and learn but in reality I would be like a one year apprentice. And I have no idea what my depression is going to do in the future. I am gaining more hope. But I have had hope lots of times.

Not that anyone cares but I felt a need to explain. I could be writing all this in my journal because it helps me to write about it. I would rather do it here. I know I write these really long posts and a lot of them. Maybe no one reads them, doesn't matter, but if it helps one person than it is worth it. It helps me so I do it.

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by zinco14532323

That could be what he is saying and that is true. I know there is no magic bullet and meds are only part of the solution. Believe me I have done all of the other stuff too. Therapy and groups and on and on and everything I could think of. So it is not like I am relying only on meds.

But if my current meds quit working in a year or two should I just stay on them? I won't I will try something else. I am not looking for 100% satisfaction from meds. I have very treatment resistant depression. Resistant to all forms of treatment. I have written about it at length in these forums. I want something that at least partly works.

It seemed to me more like he was saying it based on some theory about remission rates and AD's.

I am saying that a depressive is never truly happy, and 100% is never going to happen , my GP and shrinks work at getting you 70% then there well happy and me to. Don't doc ask what number your on from 1-10 . they don't get worried till you say bellow 5 seven in England is what they want to get you to that's a good percentage for a depressive , I can live with that

Originally Posted by sewerrats

I am saying that a depressive is never truly happy, and 100% is never going to happen , my GP and shrinks work at getting you 70% then there well happy and me to. Don't doc ask what number your on from 1-10 . they don't get worried till you say bellow 5 seven in England is what they want to get you to that's a good percentage for a depressive , I can live with that

How realistic is "happy"? I think we define as much better than it really is. You need downs to know what up feels like. That's the problem with meth addicts. They have experienced an up that no person can produce on their own. Even the best natural high can't compete. What they would describe as a 3 would be a 7 for generally healthy people. They don't need more medication. They need to learn to be ok with a 7 or 3. I realize people like us suffer more downs than other people and that's not good but I also think our culture has unrealistic expectations of what happy should be. People addicted to social sites are very unrealistic.



Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Altered Moment]

Haha, I think I am addicted to this site. I think you mean facebook and the like where all you see is happy happy. There is one friend I have on there who posts her misery but that is rare. People only want to post how great their life is and give off this false impression.

I think you are right and that our culture has this unrealistic expectation of happy. And that makes it all that much harder for us.

With Meth use when you are high you are a 9 or 10 unless you have gotten to the psychotic part of it from a lot of use. But the comes downs are a .5. So you experience both extremes. You keep chasing the high one. That is why it mimics bi polar and so does the withdrawal.

They have never been asked me the 1 to 10 scale. They do have tests you take though and answer a bunch of questions. When I am depressed I score an 85 which is right below needing hospitalization. Over all my whole life it is really hard to put it on a scale. I would give you different answers depending on what phase I am in or what year we are talking about. I have told Michanne that on a scale of 1 - 100. 100 being the worse that overall I am probably a 75 or 80. On the 1 to 10 scale I am an overall 4. That is mainly because inbetween severe depressions I am still moderately to mildly depressed. I have learned to live with this.

So if you mean by 70% a 7 and a 10 being the best then hell no I wouldn't change a thing. My expectations are not even that high. I would love a 7 for the rest of my life. Hell yeah I would be "happy" with that.

[Altered Moment]

And those damn opiates give you an 8 all the time. Best anti depressant I have ever found. Better than meth. Luckily I never got addicted to them. If I could get away with it and they were not so addictive I would self medicate with them.

Originally Posted by sewerrats

I am saying that a depressive is never truly happy, and 100% is never going to happen , my GP and shrinks work at getting you 70% then there well happy and me to. Don't doc ask what number your on from 1-10 . they don't get worried till you say bellow 5 seven in England is what they want to get you to that's a good percentage for a depressive , I can live with that

I actually really disagree with this. I have suffered with depression my entire life, but I now have significant periods of true contentment and happiness, moreso now than at any other period in my life, and a great portion of that improvement is directly related to the success of my meds. And I have tried MANY combinations and types of meds to get to this point. I was not satisfied with 70%, nor was my pdoc or T, and we kept working at it both in therapy AND with various med trials until we found a combination that has gotten me very close, if not all the way, to the 100% mark a good portion of the time. Is it 100%, 100% of the time? No, but I am so pleased that it IS 100% the majority of the time now. I am SO glad I didn't just resign myself to only be 70% okay.

So, I guess I'm saying I don't completely agree with the philosophy that a) you have to stop after so many med trials and just be okay with mediocre, and b) people with depression have to settle for being depressed to some degree all of the time. That may be okay for some, and it is absolutely the reality for some. I'm sure moderately depressed is an improvement over severely depressed; I used to be content with that too. I get that; been there; understand that. But I've also been able to finally experience NOT depressed and I realize I don't necessarily have to settle.

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

I actually really disagree with this. I have suffered with depression my entire life, but I now have significant periods of true contentment and happiness, moreso now than at any other period in my life, and a great portion of that improvement is directly related to the success of my meds. And I have tried MANY combinations and types of meds to get to this point. I was not satisfied with 70%, nor was my pdoc or T, and we kept working at it both in therapy AND with various med trials until we found a combination that has gotten me very close, if not all the way, to the 100% mark a good portion of the time. Is it 100%, 100% of the time? No, but I am so pleased that it IS 100% the majority of the time now. I am SO glad I didn't just resign myself to only be 70% okay.


So, I guess I'm saying I don't completely agree with the philosophy that a) you have to stop after so many med trials and just be okay with mediocre, and b) people with depression have to settle for being depressed to some degree all of the time. That may be okay for some, and it is absolutely the reality for some. I'm sure moderately depressed is an improvement over severely depressed; I used to be content with that too. I get that; been there; understand that. But I've also been able to finally experience NOT depressed and I realize I don't necessarily have to settle.

Curious... Did you learn to be more forgiving or accept the downs than before depression?

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Originally Posted by Michanne

Curious... Did you learn to be more forgiving or accept the downs than before depression?

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I don't know. I've learned to accept that the depressions cycle in and out and up and down, and I've also learned to predict and anticipate that those cycles indeed DO cycle and there will be real relief if I can maintain some perspective and patience with myself and the whole damned process. I have much less utter despair now than I used to, and that is encouraging. I have more stamina through the episodes of depression than I once did, in great part to therapy with immense help from successful meds.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

I actually really disagree with this. I have suffered with depression my entire life, but I now have significant periods of true contentment and happiness, moreso now than at any other period in my life, and a great portion of that improvement is directly related to the success of my meds. And I have tried MANY combinations and types of meds to get to this point. I was not satisfied with 70%, nor was my pdoc or T, and we kept working at it both in therapy AND with various med trials until we found a combination that has gotten me very close, if not all the way, to the 100% mark a good portion of the time. Is it 100%, 100% of the time? No, but I am so pleased that it IS 100% the majority of the time now. I am SO glad I didn't just resign myself to only be 70% okay.

So, I guess I'm saying I don't completely agree with the philosophy that a) you have to stop after so many med trials and just be okay with mediocre, and b) people with depression have to settle for being depressed to some degree all of the time. That may be okay for some, and it is absolutely the reality for some. I'm sure moderately depressed is an improvement over severely depressed; I used to be content with that too. I get that; been there; understand that. But I've also been able to finally experience NOT depressed and I realize I don't necessarily have to settle.

Please post in my med success stories thread.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/depre...ess-story.html

http://forums.psychcentral.com/psych...post-here.html

Oh wait maybe you did already. thanks if so. i put it in the depression section to. To me that section is more important because so many people are really struggling in that section and may not come to this one.

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by Michanne

How realistic is "happy"? I think we define as much better than it really is. You need downs to know what up feels like. That's the problem with meth addicts. They have experienced an up that no person can produce on their own. Even the best natural high can't compete. What they would describe as a 3 would be a 7 for generally healthy people. They don't need more medication. They need to learn to be ok with a 7 or 3. I realize people like us suffer more downs than other people and that's not good but I also think our culture has unrealistic expectations of what happy should be. People addicted to social sites are very unrealistic.



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I didn't think we were talking about meth addicts, heroin addicts , or sex addicts . I thought we were taking depressives, michanne you know the answer, what does a forum addict like to score out of ten ps, you slipped a cheeky one in there

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

I actually really disagree with this. I have suffered with depression my entire life, but I now have significant periods of true contentment and happiness, moreso now than at any other period in my life, and a great portion of that improvement is directly related to the success of my meds. And I have tried MANY combinations and types of meds to get to this point. I was not satisfied with 70%, nor was my pdoc or T, and we kept working at it both in therapy AND with various med trials until we found a combination that has gotten me very close, if not all the way, to the 100% mark a good portion of the time. Is it 100%, 100% of the time? No, but I am so pleased that it IS 100% the majority of the time now. I am SO glad I didn't just resign myself to only be 70% okay.

So, I guess I'm saying I don't completely agree with the philosophy that a) you have to stop after so many med trials and just be okay with mediocre, and b) people with depression have to settle for being depressed to some degree all of the time. That may be okay for some, and it is absolutely the reality for some. I'm sure moderately depressed is an improvement over severely depressed; I used to be content with that too. I get that; been there; understand that. But I've also been able to finally experience NOT depressed and I realize I don't necessarily have to settle.

What meds do you reach 100% on you want to bottle it, WOW , if you stubbed your toe would that put you down to %95 carnt you see how unrealistic 100%is

Originally Posted by sewerrats

What meds do you reach 100% on you want to bottle it, WOW , if you stubbed your toe would that put you down to %95 carnt you see how unrealistic 100%is

You didn't quite read my post, did you? Try reading it again for what it really says.

[sewerrats]

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

You didn't quite read my post, did you? Try reading it again for what it really says.

O I read it the first time you reach 100% many times but cycle down to 70 % to, do to meds and therapy

So a depressive doesn't have to be depressed all of the time. You aren't doomed to always have some level of depression 100% of the time. I don't have to settle for that. I DO experience true, 100% happiness and contentment a great deal of the time. Is that that way 100% of the time? Of course not. I said that. No one is 100% happy 100% of the time. But YOU said, no one with depression is EVER truly happy. I disagree with that.

I think where our misunderstanding is coming in is in how we define 100%. It appears that you define "not depressed" as zero depression 100% of the time. THAT is unrealistic. AND it is not my definition. I define "not depressed" as zero depression at some point in time, in my case at this point, the majority of the time. I'm cool with that. I'm ecstatic with that actually.

You say what I experience is impossible for someone who suffers from depression to experience at all ("a depressive is never truly happy") and that if I "stub my toe", and get a bit depressed about it it negates my experience of complete absence of depression (happiness) entirely. I'd say we have an entirely different view of what happiness is.

[Altered Moment]

Also in the depression section which would actually probably be more helpful to people as in that section people are really struggling and we need hope.

Thanks so much for posting.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/depre...ess-story.html

Originally Posted by 1914sierra

I don't know. I've learned to accept that the depressions cycle in and out and up and down, and I've also learned to predict and anticipate that those cycles indeed DO cycle and there will be real relief if I can maintain some perspective and patience with myself and the whole damned process. I have much less utter despair now than I used to, and that is encouraging. I have more stamina through the episodes of depression than I once did, in great part to therapy with immense help from successful meds.

That's good. That's kind of what I am striving for though time will tell. I am starting to see it as cyclical and perhaps even necessary in some ways. I'm one of those people that needs to hibernate sometimes. I come out of it so maybe that is not really a bad thing (as long as I can manage the paycheck part). Meds don't really let you do that so I can see hoe they can be detrimental in that respect. It's about listening to your mind and acceptance. The therapy is helping with acceptance.

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