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#1
May 14, 2009, 02:22 PM
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At my last session I told my therapist I was raped five years ago. I don't think I can go to my session tomorrow. I'm terrified he knows.
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#2
May 14, 2009, 03:06 PM
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Hi Vienna,
I'm so sorry for what you went through.  It is totally understandable that you are scared to back after disclosing something so painful. Could you call/email your T beforehand to get some reassurance? Or maybe you could go and not talk about anything scary? - just be with your T and take it easy for a while.... Take care of yourself, ok? 
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#3
May 14, 2009, 03:27 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( dear vienna ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
I cringe every time I hear T come to the door of the waiting room, she knows so much about me; but when I look up and see her face my fears start to leave me. She is so strong for me on the days when I cannot find any strength in myself. May it be so for you.
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#4
May 14, 2009, 07:38 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((vienna)))))))))))))))))))
For me, the HARDEST therapy sessions to go to are the ones after a big disclosure. But I go, and T is still T, and he still cares for me in the same way, and even though I've said this HUGE THING, I'm still okay with him. I hope you feel some relief after your session.
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#5
May 14, 2009, 07:49 PM
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(((vienna)))
The worst is going back after a disclosure. Especially if you been whipping yourself for the past 1-2 weeks for doing it. The good news is... your T is likely to treat you A LOT better than you've been treating yourself. Vienna, I urge you to go. It is difficult to get yourself there, but you will likely leave feeling a little bit better than you do right now.
__________________
"Joy is your sole's knowledge that if you don't get the promotion, keep the relationship, or buy the house, it's because you weren't meant to.You're meant to have something better, something richer, something deeper, Something More." (Sara Ban Breathnach) |
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#6
May 15, 2009, 03:34 PM
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I'm sorry...I canceled. I couldn't go. Thank you for replying to me though.
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#7
May 15, 2009, 04:04 PM
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((((((((((vienna))))))))))
__________________
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#8
May 15, 2009, 05:25 PM
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(((( HUGS ))))
I've sooooo been there...and I will be there again....Tomorrow, we will be exploring some real SA and some "I'm not sure if this really happened to me" memories.... Then, I'll have to face him in group T on Tuesday....and another individual session on Thursday. Soooo scary.....
__________________
Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail... 
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#9
May 15, 2009, 06:19 PM
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It's okay that you cancelled. Your T will be ready to listen and talk when you are ready to go back.
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