[MINIME]

The love i get from my t's has healed me so much i can hold their love to the yuckiness and feel my self through their eyes and love her to. Weird how love heals.

[sarahxxkristine]

amen to that

Hi MIninme,

I am still try to figure that out for myself, I know it intellectually, but emotionally I am trying to accept that from my T. Last week when I told her about what my unethical T told me, that he wouldn't come to my funeral and that he didn't care about me. She told me that she couldn't do what she did if there wasn't any love for me or any of her clients. It is the first time I had any of my T's say this.

But I believe love does heal, when I work with troubled kids, you can see it working, but it is hard to accept when it comes to me RECEIVING it. I give it all the time, but I guess you have to be able to know it is okay to receive it.

I think of you too when I have my sessions Minime, because I am doing EMDR today, but my T said she will do a milder form to ease into it since I do have a lot a anxiety of doing it because of what happened with that unethical T. You must be so brave to do it all the time.

[chaotic13]

Interestingly I was at a talk the other day not directly related to therapy or psychological issues. But one of the speakers spoke briefly about yoga. He had us do an exercise first with the palms down (warrior pose) and then with the palms up. He asked if we felt a difference. Most people, myself included experience the exercise very differently depending on the position of the palms. He made a comment about how ancient cultures understood how important is was to practice both giving and receiving and embedded subtle ways to bring this into daily practice.

The interactions I've had the past few month with my T...well have profoundly affected me. I'm not sure I'm ready to profess it as love, but it is. I just haven't yet fully liberated that word.

wow chaotic! I practice yoga, so I guess I am receiving even when I don't think I am. lol But what a powerful exercise, gonna tell my yoga instructor today about that! :-)

(((((((((((minime)))))))))))

Love is so healing when we can let it in. You deserve all the love you can soak up

[chaotic13]

Exotic,
I am a yoga novice but I felt a big difference in the "energy flow" between the palm up vs palm down positions. I know there are different types of yoga, but the next time you are in yoga class see if you can shift your focus from your breath into your hands. Its cool. What I find even cooler is how different ancient practices connect you with various concepts like love, acceptance without you consciously realizing it. How many times have you done the mountain pose or the triangle pose or other poses and just immediately felt lifted in some way. When you let yourself explore and experience you realize these monks or other spiritual gurus were really scientists. Exploring ways to connect to something that the average person doesn't even know exists. Then they shared their research with the masses in a way that we could benefit from without spending hours in isolated mediation. Bottomline, most people do yoga, tai chi, exercise, meditation, prayer...whatever because they feel good doing it. What is REALLY amazing to me is...no matter what the technique or who helps you do it (T, priest,best friend, personal trainer...) at the most basic level it is about connecting with that universal energy source that is clean,renewalable,free to all,abundant, and unlimited -- LOVE.

Mimime... I am so glad your Ts are helping you reconnect with and receive love. My therapy along with my friends are helping me too. I think there is hope that one day I will be able to use that term freely, without worrying how others might misinterpret it, and without feeling guilty, unworthy, and suspicious when others try to give it to me.

[MINIME]

I tell them i love them all the time. I hold on to that love frow them everyday. I know some t's wouldnt like this or do this but my therapy wouldnt work any other way. They say u r internalizing our love and now u feel worth better things and i say yeah but dont think ur job will get any easier lol. I feel happy and able to sit with flashbacks by imagining what they would say.

[rainbow8]

I have trouble with "love" too. I want to receive it from my T, but not give it. When friends say they "love" me, I feel awkward. I guess I still don't feel worthy of being loved. But I'm thinking lately that I DO love my T, and others in my life too. I love them, but have trouble using the word "love" except to my kids. I'm trying to tell my very elderly father, on the phone, that I love him. It's hard!

The yoga stuff is very interesting!

[rainbow8]

MINIME, I think it's wonderful that you are able to love and receive love so freely!! You make me

[peaches100]

Minime,

I'm so glad that you have t's who let you experience the give and take of tender caring feelings. It's a wonderful thing.

[chaotic13]

Rainbow... ME TOO! I struggle with the word LOVE too. But, I'm trying to expand the narrow definition I seem to have for this term. It is definitely a process. One that Minime and her Ts are sharing and building without allowing others to influence it or distort it into something else.

If my T told me at this point that she loved me, it would freak me out a bit. However, I THINK I would not run for th hills anymore. I would likely ask for a clairfication. "Ah, OK...what type of love are we talking about here?" Now that I think about it...a comment like that would be a good test for me to practice navigating through uncomfortable gray areas.

Minime...you seem like you beyond this stage so... You go girl!

[Sannah]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

MINIME, I think it's wonderful that you are able to love and receive love so freely!!

This is an excellent statement and oh so true!!!!!!!!!!