Anyone out there with a T who's not warm & fuzzy?

My T is not warm & fuzzy either. She has shown me that she cares by her actions, as others have already posted about their Ts. Many times I felt a warm glow in my heart just because of something she said or did for me. I've had other Ts who were warmer, but I wasn't able to accept it from them. I have a new friend/relative who is warm and fuzzy to me. I can "take in" her hugs and hug back, and fully appreciate the love she gives me, for free. Ultimately, we need to find our "warm and fuzzies" with people who are in our life outside of therapy. However, if we don't have anyone like that yet, a warm and fuzzy T may be just what we need. May we all find our "warm and fuzzies" wherever and whenever we can!

My T is not very warm and fuzzy and is very professional during my sessions. I do occasionally sense a softer side of her in her email communications. Sometimes her all business approach is hard to deal with now. Especially since we are now trying to tap into my inner child. My small child kind of sees her as an adult/teacher; not a playmate LOL. BUT, I think the persona my T has assumed was very important in my ablity to initially develop trust in her and the overall therapy process.

IDK, I experience my T at the moment as not warm and fuzzy, but genuinely caring.

Me too! I think therapy has helped me find and be open to these warm and fuzzy people.

I just want to clarify that my T does allow hugs and has held my hand on occasion. But she is tough and blunt, lol. She does not baby me, but she is right there if I need her. No one has ever been able to get me back from a dissociated state like my T!

I really think that what works best for one person might not work best for another. I don't think I would have responded very well to a T who was tough and blunt, but that may be just what some others need. It's individual. No right or wrong style...no better or worse style... but what works best for each client and what that client needs. I think that therapists have to work through their own temperaments to try and best meet their clients' needs.

Brightheart, I don't know if I wanted my T to be blunt and tough, but that's the way she was, and that's what she thought I needed. It may not be what I wanted, but what I needed. What we want is not always what we need. Also, a T once told me that each T has to practice therapy in a way fitting his or her personality. Some people are more open than others; some are more blunt, and some are more fuzzy. I agree with you that there is no right or wrong.

That's interesting to me because I never thought before what personality traits I wanted in a T. When I first went to both my Ts (my current T is my second), what I wanted was someone to help me with my problems. I never thought of thinking they should be a certain way or not. I guess I just wanted them to be effective and didn't think much about personality characteristics. My own T is warm, open, and strong. I wouldn't call him fuzzy (especially his head).

I'm not sure I would call my former T "fuzzy" either, but he had the potential to be fuzzy if the situation warranted it. Does that make sense? I would call it more of a capacity for tenderness than "fuzziness". I definitely needed a very gentle, patient and understanding T going in to therapy. Back then, I really think anything else would have spelled disaster for me. But, again, that is just my own experience and what worked for me. Ideally therapists have a sense of what is best for any individual client. If it works, then that is what matters.

my pdoc who is a T, is not fuzzy and huggy at all? She has a no touching type of boundary. I'm not used to this, I actually want to push this boundary but thats what i do. Unfortunatly! Anyway she is really nice and i want to be able to hug her but she also has the firm boundaries that i have never been given.

my T has never touched me in the year+ that we've been working together. I think there are a lot of other ways to show warmth and caring, though. She certainly maintains eye contact and is very present during my sessions. Shows caring through her tone of voice and the words she says, and being available on the phone.

I think it would be really weird for me to have her hug me, I have no idea what she does with other clients but having no physical contact is fine with me. I don't like being touched, she's probably fully aware of that although we haven't really talked about it.

This has been an interesting topic, to think about and to read.

I have been avoiding writing in this thread, as this is a touchy (haha, pun not intended) topic for me.

Mine certainly isn't warm or fuzzy. I wouldn't say she is cold, but I haven't been able to feel any warmth. Its hard because I don't know if I'm projecting my fears onto her, and therefore see her as not caring...or if she's just really rigid with her boundaries.