[ECHOES]

Borrowing the topic idea from the General forum...

We often wish T was this way or that way, would do this or that... but:
What is one thing (or more!) that you would never change about your T ?

[Melbadaze]

who she is.

[Perna]

The sense of her presence, that she is "there," listening.

His straight forward honesty with me.

[darkrunner]

good question Echoes!

Her patience is the first thing that comes to mind.
And, along with that, her determination not to give up on me.

[chaotic13]

She doesn't placate. If you're not up to talking about stuff that's OK, but she won't lie to you and say its not a problem.

[BlueMoon6]

The way she listens and responds without judgement and understands where I am at now.

[WePow]

He is exactly who I need him to be as a T. I want him to change though on his own for his own growth. He brings that with him into session in a very positive way - as examples of what is working for CSA recovery and healing. I suppose that is what I do not want him to change - his own ability to learn and grow and teach me how to do the same. I look up to him as my role model in a huge way.

[0171292]

the way she sort of understands how i'm feeling, and how she doesn't get shocked by anything i say.

His trust in me, and his belief in me. His TOTAL acceptance. Almost everything.

[sw628]

Her empathy and nurturing presence. How she shows her love for me in so many ways

[pinkcorr]

Her honesty, her patience and the fact that all the things I've told her she hasn't been different with me.

I am looking for a T, but if I find one I hope it is patience and being gentle.

[jexa]

I'm going to ignore the "one thing" part and list a few things.

- the fact that she self-discloses about her own social anxiety
- the fact that she always goes overtime with me when I am her last patient of the day (usually) and even sometimes schedules the people after me at 7:45 instead of 7:30 to give me extra time for free. I can't believe she does that for me!
- her "presence," she is always truly listening
- her honest concern for my well-being
- her genuine nature - she is always "real" with me
- her gentleness. She treats me with such care.
- her humility. It is so very endearing.
- her perfect balance of calling me out on things while also validating my feelings and who I am.

Wow, I love her (in a healthy, professional relationship way).

[sunrise]

His self-disclosure and willingness to reciprocate. And, as tree said, "almost everything."

[polarsmom]

I love that my T and I can share a good laugh.

[skeksi]

His slow, quiet "I care about you and I don't want to scare you" voice.

[fallenangel337]

I can't think of anything I would change about her.

-I love how we can laugh together.
-She discloses things about herself that really help and make me feel less alone in what I'm dealing with.
-She lets me know she's there when I need her.

[Hearty]

If I had to pick one thing, it would be the amazing way he is able to look into my eyes and connect with me...sometimes in silence. At that moment I feel understood, loved...and satisfied. Satisfied and thankful that there's finally a person in this world I trust enough to allow into my soul. I've never felt this level of intimacy with anyone...scary and wonderful at the same time.

He is the most special human being I have ever come across in my life...honest, trustworthy, respectful, sensitive, giving, brilliant, fearless...I'm lucky to have found him after going through a painful termination with a prior T.

And despite my occasional negative transference, my love and respect keeps growing for this man.

[TayQuincy]

Her being there when I really need her

Her level of self disclosure, it helps me so much to know her

[BlackCanary]

His sense of humor, and his willingness to sass me just a bit every once in a while
The sass makes me realize he was listening and observing, can flip it back on me in a funny, annoying and special way.
Ex: A David Burns book mentions how therapists are conflict-phobic, won't acknowledge a client's anger. Told my T about this and recounted the failed therapist role play. At the end of my session he gave me stupid feedback and I told him that it was stupid. He apologized, said he was looking at the clock. Then he said "You must be angry". Had to say it twice before I got the joke. I stuck out my tongue and gave him the finger I could have left there still annoyed but I left with a smile on my face, happy that we can work together so well.

[rainbow8]

Even though I'm looking for a new T because I finally realize that there are too many things I WOULD like to change about my T, there are still so many things about her that I like.

She always returns phone calls promptly, often within a couple of hours, and often answers the phone herself.

She has always been able to schedule me within a few days after I call for an appointment.

She has always given me 100% of her attention during a session, and if rarely, she has to answer the phone, makes it very brief and apologizes.

She has never canceled a session in 7 years.

I miss her.

[lostin08]

My T is truely one of the best T's I had. One other 1 was great too and I still communicate with her to this day. There is nothing I would change about my T now I can even tell her when she is driving me nuts!

lets see...that she trusts me.

[polarsmom]

Originally Posted by BlackCanary

His sense of humor, and his willingness to sass me just a bit every once in a while
The sass makes me realize he was listening and observing, can flip it back on me in a funny, annoying and special way.
Ex: A David Burns book mentions how therapists are conflict-phobic, won't acknowledge a client's anger. Told my T about this and recounted the failed therapist role play. At the end of my session he gave me stupid feedback and I told him that it was stupid. He apologized, said he was looking at the clock. Then he said "You must be angry". Had to say it twice before I got the joke. I stuck out my tongue and gave him the finger I could have left there still annoyed but I left with a smile on my face, happy that we can work together so well.

This is how my T is. I love that even when I have an emotional session he can lighten things up before I leave. To me that is huge. It helps to get on with the rest of my day. So when I think back on the session I not only have the thought provoking stuff we discussed, I have that laugh, giggle or smirk to think back on. It usually makes me smile again. Which at this time in my life I am needing. I am working on feeling genuine happiness. As I'm sure most of us are.