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#1
Jun 04, 2010, 11:07 PM
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I started a thread called "video" on the Survivors or Abuse forum, but I think maybe it's more relevant here.
Basically, I have a video file on my computer of a violent episode involving my father from a few years back.. Even though I know how it's going to end, I always end up watching it and triggering myself. I do it every year, and i'm fighting with myself not to do it. It's like I think after a year has passed I'll have better insight and discover something when i watch it. I want to talk to T about it. I kind of want her to watch it with me...but I don't think she would. And maybe that's not a good idea. All I know is that I'm drawn to watching it this time of year, every year. And I know I'm going to do it again. Maybe if I watched it with her, something about it would kind of be "settled"..and I'll feel like there's no need to watch it again. I'm not sure  .... thoughts?Thanks for reading. |
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#2
Jun 04, 2010, 11:32 PM
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wow, lily, that's tough.
 Have you talked to your T about the video at all? I think that's a good place to start. You could talk about why you have it and why you are drawn to watching it again and again, especially this time of year. Why do you think your T wouldn't watch it with you, or is it just that you're afraid she will say no?
__________________
She left pieces of her life behind her everywhere she went.
"It's easier to feel the sunlight without them," she said. ~Brian Andreas |
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#3
Jun 05, 2010, 04:40 AM
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sounds like compusive repetition, hoping to work outna different outcome and outride your feelings that were going on at that time? Yes talking about it and putting another slant on it is the way through I feel.
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#4
Jun 05, 2010, 09:23 AM
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I would talk to T about it and see if she would be willing to watch it with you and discuss it.
__________________
"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#5
Jun 05, 2010, 09:28 AM
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hi lily, yes, definitely share that with her. i'm sure she'd be willing to watch it as it might help you a great deal. i don't think it's that different than listening to you tell her about an abusive event from your past, it's just a different form of communication. either way, i think therapist are trained to handle all this kind of stuff. but i think i'd ask first, just out of respect. it might be something that you both have to "prepare" for.
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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