[johnsmom]

I don't think my therapist is listening to me at my sessions. Every once in a while i look up to see if she is hearing what I am saying. She looks like she is falling asleep as I tell her that I just lost my aunt and grandmother in one week. I tell her that I have hit bottom and she stares at me blankly. I want to smack her in the face everytime I see her. I am a rapid cycler and I am in therapy because I know I need it. I know I have to talk to someone about how feel, if I wanted to talk to myselfI wouldn't have to find a ride to her office thirty miles from where I live.

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by johnsmom

I don't think my therapist is listening to me at my sessions. Every once in a while i look up to see if she is hearing what I am saying. She looks like she is falling asleep as I tell her that I just lost my aunt and grandmother in one week. I tell her that I have hit bottom and she stares at me blankly. I want to smack her in the face everytime I see her. I am a rapid cycler and I am in therapy because I know I need it. I know I have to talk to someone about how feel, if I wanted to talk to myselfI wouldn't have to find a ride to her office thirty miles from where I live.

Do you like her in any way? All you've posted about her is negative. What is keeping you with her instead of seeing another therapist?

If you do want to stay with her, you could ask her if she is bored or falling asleep when you talk, and see what she says. Maybe her answer will help you know whether to move on or stay.

[johnsmom]

That is good advice. I am the type of person who is afraid of hurting someone. I have tried to think ways to confront her about this and I think your suggestion will be the best way. Thank you.

[justasmallpiece]

With my therapist that I had, I stayed too long for fear of hurting him. I developed a type of Stockholm syndrome. It wasn't healthy for me to stay so I left. You can do it too if you want.

[Melbadaze]

oh there are times I've like wacking T in the face for what I percieved as indifference...looking at it though, I was raised in a household where shouting and dramatic outbursts were the norm and I'd never actually learnt to have healthy relationships and couldn't read anyones true empathy, oe understand unspoken communications.

Sorry for your losses

[ECHOES]

It is very important to share all your feelings with her, including these that you posted about. Ask her if her appearing to be falling asleep and not listening are what she is experiencing. Tell her that you felt she looked at you blankly when you were telling her about losing your losses.

There are times that my T gets a 'look'. lol I thought it meant one thing but I have come to understand that it is the look she gets when she is intently listening (to what is said, what is not said, what the feelings are) and drawing from what she knows about me and drawing from her therapist history and education. When I mentioned it, she said she knew exactly the look I meant. Now I just say "Oh, there's that look." and we both laugh. Actually, now knowing what it is about, it makes me feel really heard and attended to.

[johnsmom]

Thank you sunrise justasmallpiece Melbadaze and ECHOES for your input and advice. I still want to smack her in the head. lol. My next appoint is on the seventh of June. I will let you know how it goes. Thanks again.

[johnsmom]

Update. my appointment went well with my T yesterday. I asked he I was keeping her awake. She immediately started apologizing. She told of she was keeping mental notes as she does not like writing while I talk. I told her about a forum where I talk to others about what's happening in our lives and that I get advice, good advice, from others like myself. She said that was great that I have found an outlet. She asked the name of the forum and I used my sons reply "I don't know" I told her when I remember I would tell her. thanks again for your help and support.