[doogie]

I've really been struggling with the worry that all my issues and problems and neediness with eventually push my T away. I think I've finally reached a point in our relationship that I know - really know - that he isn't going to leave me. That he is going to be there to see me to the end of all this. I've struggled so much with trusting him, and it has just been I am so glad that I'm finally "there", you know? I feel like I've been trying not to "need" him as much as I really do or ask as much of him out of session as maybe I needed because I afraid that all that would push him away. But now I'm finally realizing (after he has told me over and over) that my need of him is ok. I have a really long road ahead, but I'm at least glad to have this hurdle behind me.

[mobius]

That's amazing, doogie. It speaks volumes to your process of healing and willingness to keep doing what you needed to do to establish trust.

I'm in the midst of that process...think it's getting easier, but it's still damned hard sometimes.

[zooropa]

I really struggle with this, too. My T has told me that she's going to see me through this trauma work, but at the same time, I know I don't an unlimited amount of time that she will be in my life. It's partly due to funding, and partly due to the kind of therapy she does. It's not a long term therapy. I'm trying to trust that I will have as long as I need, but it is scary.